Info

Over It And On With It

Christine Hassler provides you with practical tools and spiritual principles to help you overcome whatever obstacles might be holding you back. Each episode, Christine coaches callers live on the air offering them inspiration and guidance to heal their past, change their present and create what they really want. Topics include: relationships, career, health, transitions, finances, life purpose, spirituality and whatever else callers have questions about. Christine coaches "regular people" on problems – and opportunities - we all face. It's a show that reminds you that you are not alone, while also teaching things you can implement in your own life.
RSS Feed Subscribe in Apple Podcasts
Over It And On With It
2021
February
January


2020
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2019
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2018
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2017
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2016
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2015
December
November
October


Categories

All Episodes
Archives
Categories
Now displaying: 2016
Apr 7, 2016

There is a difference between being alone and feeling the pain of loneliness. We do not have to suffer from the pain of loneliness if we are enjoying a connected relationship with our self and a higher power. We are never really alone, and the illusion of the separation of God, higher power source or universe, is one of the core misunderstandings we are all here to overcome. If we tell ourselves things like “I’m alone, I hate being by myself, something must be wrong with me, I really need to be with other people”, then, of course we feel the pain of loneliness. It’s very human to want to be connected and to make sure we are getting our soul food by spending time with people we love. Feeling isolated or disconnected is incredibly hard. But sometimes it is the pain of loneliness that inspires us to do the work to nurture a better relationship with our self, or to create or deepen a spiritual connection.    This is exactly what is on the soul agenda for today’s caller, Christina. Her question initially is about the assumptions she’s making that are sabotaging her relationship, but her core issue is fear of being alone. She has a track record of being in toxic relationships or relationships she truly doesn’t want to be in just because it was better than being on her own. Remember you are never truly alone. You are always connected to infinite and unconditional love from God. I invite all of you to join me September 16-22 for my retreat in magical Bali which  will include meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the opportunity to meet soul friends. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join the festivities or to join me in Los Angeles in July for my signature retreat.   Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Is your fear of being alone so considerable that you jump from relationship to relationship? ● Do you hesitate to do things alone? ● Are you terrified you will end up old and alone? ● Do you only feel safe when you are with another person? ● Are you longing for a deeper connection to yourself and a higher power so you do not have to experience the pain of loneliness or separation?   Christina’s Question: Christina feels she is sabotaging her relationship by assuming this partner will do the same things as her previous partner.   Christina’s Key Insights and Aha’s: ● She panics when she thinks of being alone ● She is trying to learn how to be in a relationship with herself ● She grew up with a fear of losing the people she loved ● She settles in relationships to keep herself from being alone   How to get over it and on with it: ● Redefine what being alone is ● Create a feeling of safety without having someone else there ● Have honest communication with her partner about taking a break ● Bring a spiritual practice into her life ● Apply her own calming tactics into her own life   Tools and Takeaways: ● Understand your default pattern when you feel lonely. What can you tell yourself instead of going into your default pattern?  ● Think of someone you speak highly of and then talk about yourself the same way. You deserve to be the recipient of loving, self-talk. ● Cultivate a spiritual practice. ● Make connections with soul friends and your soul family.   Sponsor: Onnit Wellness - Receive a 10% discount on your purchase when you order through this link (including my favorite Alpha Brain).   Resources: Christine Hassler Expectation Hangover @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Jill@christinehassler.com

Apr 2, 2016

Wouldn’t you love to bring in more of what you want in your life without working so hard at it? If the answer is yes, then I think you will really love the practice I have for you today that is one of the biggest secrets to my success. In this episode of coaches corner I share a practice that has led to the manifestation of few of the things that have been integral to the growth of my business.

Mar 30, 2016

Our dreams come from our inner wisdom and our wants come from our ego. We all have things that happen in our lives, which create fear, uncertainty, doubt and self-limiting beliefs. Often, we try to ease the pain of those things by chasing after something. For example, if you are really hard on yourself, then you may spend a lot of time wanting someone else to love you. You have a high want for a romantic relationship or you have a parent who was really hard on you or only validated you for your accomplishments, and you may have grown up with the feeling of unworthiness and high want for money and success. Ego-based wants come from feeling ‘less than’, and then searching for something or someone to fill the void. These kinds of wants are not coming from an authentic place, because at the authentic self-level we know that absolutely nothing is missing. The want is coming from our ego. When we obtain our ego-based wants, they only give us a temporary sense of satisfaction. They do not cure the deep longing we feel for worthiness, belonging and love. How do we know something we are longing for is not an ego-based desire but a true dream we must pursue? It comes down to the feeling of longing, which we feel in our heart, not in our head. Our dreams are a psychic prediction of what is coming; we feel a deep longing to experience something because we know that on some level, it is our destiny.  We can’t always control the form and timing of it and that is where suffering can come in.  It is imperative we pursue our dreams on the level of essence, not form; and we focus on the feelings we long to feel rather than try to make it happen or get attached to how we think it should happen. An example of this is, perhaps you feel a longing to make an impact on the world. You feel a deep desire in your heart, which is almost painful when you feel you are not doing it right now. Instead of trying to figure out what business to start to make a difference, focus instead on the feelings you want to feel and then begin to take aligned actions in that direction. Set the intention every day to be of service and ask to be used as an instrument of impact. Look for the simple ways to make an impact right now. When it comes to dreams, waiting is not a good idea. Take action now to move you in the direction of how you want to feel and what you want to experience. The biggest roadblock to going after dreams is fear. Nothing silences the voice of your inner wisdom more than doubt and fear. Honor your dreams and stop being so scared.  Today’s caller, Anya is scared and feels guilty about wanting to go after her dream because it was not her original plan. I invite all of you to join me in September 16-22 for my retreat in Bali will include meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the finest conversations with like-minded women. I will also be available for personal sessions. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join the festivities or to join me in July for my signature retreat.   Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Do you know what your dreams are? Are you terrified to go after them? ● Do you feel stuck because you do not know how to turn your dreams and longings into actual steps? ● Are you concerned that if you don’t go after your dreams soon you will spend the rest of your life regretting it?   Anya’s Question: Anya has been feeling lost because she is passionate about acting but she is afraid to follow her dream.   Anya’s Key Insights and Aha’s: ● She feels the pressure of the expectations others have of her ● She is embarrassed that her dream is different than her education ● She needs to take the first step   How to get over it and on with it: ● She can give herself permission to stand for her dreams ● She should communicate her dream to others ● She needs to take the first step ● She should write a list of all the reasons acting is important to her   Tools and Takeaways: ● Give yourself permission to pursue your dreams ● Write down a list of reasons why your dreams have value and are safe to explore ● Change or update your story to include what matters most to you ● Get fully behind your dreams with intention   Sponsor: Onnit Wellness - Receive a 10% discount on your purchase when you order through this link (Including my favorite Alpha Brain).   Resources: Christine Hassler Expectation Hangover 20 Something Manifesto @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram

Mar 26, 2016

This Coach’s Corner features inspirational catalyst John O’Leary.  As a nine-year-old boy, John was burned on 100% of his body and expected to die. Today, he travels the world teaching others how to truly live. John empowers 50,000 people each year to LIVE INSPIRED at live events. He released his first book earlier this month and it is a bestseller on Amazon. After hearing him today in our coaches corner, you’ll definitely want a copy so remember the title: ON FIRE: The 7 Choices to Ignite a Radically Inspired Life. John is a business owner, writer, husband and father of four. Expected to die. Now, teaching others how to truly live. John O’Leary, welcome to Over it and On with It!.

Mar 23, 2016

Have you ever had something come back around like a romantic relationship, friendship, job or career path that you thought was over? Or perhaps you’ve gotten a second chance with a different situation or cast of characters.  Like a new relationship after a divorce or a job after being laid off. Or even your health after getting to the other side of an illness. Second chances do happen for all of us and when they do, it is important that we apply the lessons we learned the first time around. Many of us are great about doing this because we are intentional about not wanting to repeat the same kind of what we’d call mistakes again.  We approach second chances with gratitude and excitement. But second chances can also produce fear.  What is fascinating (and rather sad) about us humans sometimes is that the closer what we truly wants gets, the more we attempt to push it away.  Obviously this is not a conscious thing we do, the saboteur is very sneaky…yet powerful. And the reason we sabotage is because we have not fully healed the core issues and misunderstandings around love and worthiness.    You’ll listen to an example of this with today’s caller Jenny who has gotten a second chance in regards to a romantic relationship.  She would love to just feel grateful and excited, yet what she is experiencing is a roller coaster of emotions.  The time is now for her to accept that she is truly worthy of love. She can open her heart, expose her vulnerability and bloom into her feminine aspect or she can go to her protected, solitary place. Being honest and vulnerable in her relationships will allow her to let someone special in without feeling fear.  Coaching Tip from this call: Focus should be on learning and not on the outcome. Dropping our ego and adopting a learning oriented approach to life serves both client and coach, equally. I invite all of you to join me in September for an my retreat in magical Bali will include meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the finest conversations with like-minded women. I will also be available for personal sessions. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join the festivities on September 16-22.   Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Have you recently gotten a second chance at something and if so, how are you approaching it? ● Is there someone or something you would like a second chance with? ● Do you truly know you are deserving of love and/or success? ● Do you get anxious about a relationship, and experience a roller coaster of emotions? ● Ladies, do you live in your in your masculine energy a lot? Gentlemen, do you have trouble connecting to a woman who experiences a roller coaster of emotions?   Jenny’s Question: Jenny wants to know why she reacted like she did when a nice guy wanted to be her boyfriend and what tools she can use to stay in the present and to drop the anxiety.   Jenny’s Key Insights and Aha’s: ● She doesn’t feel worthy of love ● She is being vulnerable and it feels uncomfortable ● She may feel like a fraud when accepting love ● She can feel safe receiving love   How to get over it and on with it: ● Focus on the shared visions and values ● Recognize self-worth ● Talk to anxiety in a feminine, loving way ● Shift awareness and let love in   Tools and Takeaways: ● Stay in the present and be grateful for all you have ● Think of the ways you can be more vulnerable ● Practice saying “Thank You” ● Check out Men Exposed, Alison Armstrong and David Deita   Sponsor: Onnit Wellness - Receive a 10% discount on your purchase when you order through this link (Including my favorites, Alpha Brain and MCT Oil)   Resources: Christine Hassler Men Exposed Allison Armstrong The Queen’s Code David Dieta @christinhassler on twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Jill@christinehassler.com

Mar 19, 2016

Are you too nice? That may seem like a strange question because most of us would think that being nice is a wonderful way to be. But sometimes we are too nice. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for love, kindness and generosity. Yet I’ve noticed that although niceness is very p.c., it isn’t always authentic. In today’s coaches corner I discuss the danger of killing yourself with inauthentic kindness!

Mar 16, 2016

Why does our list of requirements for a lover, looks a lot like a job application? There are considerations for height, weight, and experience. Did we meet the person based on a reference from someone else? Do they fit into our mold of the “right one”?

When we focus or obsess more on how the relationship is progressing than the quality of the experience, we miss out on why we are supposed to be in the relationship in the first place. What we are questioning is not actually a real dispute. We are creating doubts in order to use them as distractions so we do not have to address the real issue, which may be something from our past we need to let go of.  

Today’s caller, Jennifer, wants to find a reason she should not be dating her younger boyfriend. She says he is supportive and loyal, which are both things she believes she wants from a relationship, but she can’t seem to make herself trust that his feelings are real. As we drill down to the actual issue, Jennifer realizes she may be the one who is holding the relationship back and that it has nothing to do with age. 

A special note to the coaches who are listening - if I had formed an opinion about the age gap in Jennifer’s relationship, we may have never gotten to the root issue, which is a core wound that needs healing. Coaches should be present and without judgment when working with clients.

I invite all of you to join me in September for my retreat in Bali which will include meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the finest conversations with like-minded women. I will also be available for personal sessions. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join the festivities on September 16-22 and if you can’t make it to Bali, you can get information for my upcoming “LA weekend” retreat.  

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Have you been dating someone and would like to know if they are the right fit? 
  • Is there something external about your partner that bothers you?
  • Is there a question unrelated to dating which is distracting you by keeping your mind busy?
  • Do you desire a love but as it gets closer you find yourself wanting to run away?

 

Jennifer’s Question:

Jennifer is in a relationship with someone 10 years younger than she is, and she wants to make sure she is not taking advantage of his youth.

 

Jennifer’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • Her boyfriend may be coming on too strong
  • She attracts unavailable people
  • She is holding anger towards her father
  • She’s continually trying to fix herself

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • She should forgive her father
  • Learn to release her emotions
  • Find her own inner parent and give herself unconditional love
  • Stop defining her relationship and open her heart to what she can learn

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Journal about underlying issues and use sentence starters like
    • ○ I really need to know the answer to this because...
    • ○ I’m really wondering about this because...
    • ○ If I had the answer to this question I would…
    • Ditch the requirements checklist when looking for or judging a partner; instead focus on how you want to feel with that person
    • Set up practices to assist you to integrate new disciplines and habits
    • Attend one of my retreats

Sponsor:

Onnit Wellness - Receive a 10% discount on your purchase when you order through this link (Including my favorite, Alpha Brain)

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

@christinhassler on twitter

@christinehassler on Instagram

Christine@christinehassler.com

Jill@ChristineHassler.com for retreat information

Mar 12, 2016

Where’s the line between preparation and obsession? Picture a time, maybe it is even now, when you have been preparing for something BIG like an interview, event, presentation, or the release of some creative endeavor. Now consider how much mental, physical, and emotional energy you put into it. Was it a lot -perhaps too much? Did you find yourself stressing out about it?  

Mar 9, 2016

You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s not your fault. You did the best you could with the tools you had at the time. These are powerful statements. What if you were told these things when you were young? Would you still be searching for your soulmate to complete you?

When we are born we are complete. We have a sense of unconditional love and acceptance. As we go through our human existence, we are influenced by others around us and we tend to believe what they tell us as truths. Since those people have been apart from source love for a longer time, they say things which may not be encouraging for us. We then experience the illusion of separation. We feel a longing for the love and acceptance of others to fill the void and heal our core wound. 

If you have ever chased love, been deeply hurt by a breakup or felt addicted to another person, you are unconsciously longing to find your way back to source love. The hurt may be hard for your ego to accept but your soul needs internal love, not love from another person. It is time to reprogram yourself. It is time to move away from being a victim and time to release your anger instead of recycling it.

Today, Deborah thinks her issue is about her indecisive new love but we find out it is not really about him but about her and her story, which is ripe for being revised.

If anything in this episode resonates with you, get my book Expectation Hangover and come to one of my signature retreats.  Together we will help you to release the feelings which no longer serve you.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Are you really hooked into someone in an unhealthy relationship?
  • Are you still reeling from a break-up and you don’t know how you will move on?
  • Have you felt a sense of loneliness or not belonging? Is there a void you are attempting to fill?
  • Do you believe once you meet your soulmate everything will be wonderful and you will feel complete?

 

Deborah’s Question:

Deborah is having a difficult time understanding why her recent great “love” keeps distancing himself from her and why her heart feels lost.

 

Deborah’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She brought the relationship to herself to heal a core wound
  • She is stuck at the emotional level
  • Loss is a core wound in her life
  • She realizes she needs to release her old story
  • It’s not her fault

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • She should release her emotions, not just recycle them
  • Try an adult temper tantrum
  • Make use of release writing until her energy shifts
  • Understand that Little Deborah did the best she could with the tools she had at the time
  • Try mothering herself as a younger child
  • Be choosy about what and who you believe
  • See past relationships for what they are, which is learning opportunities

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Read Facing Love Addiction by Pia Mellody
  • Use the emotional section of Expectation Hangover and do the meditations
  • Unfriend your ex on social media
  • Start your spiritual practice

 

Sponsor:

Onnit Wellness - Receive a 10% discount on your purchase when you order through this link.

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

@christinhassler on twitter

@christinehassler on Instagram

christine@christinehassler.com

Facing Love Addiction by Pia Mellody

Mar 5, 2016

When it comes to making a choice, is better to listen to our head or our heart? I explore this question in today’s episode of Coach’s Corner

Mar 2, 2016

Being “busy” seems to be a way we identify ourselves.  We run ourselves ragged trying to meet the expectations of our bosses, our colleagues, and our families. We begin to put our needs aside in favor of what others want. To compensate for not practicing self-love, we wear our busyness as a badge of honor, which only seems to distract us from the lack of balance in our lives. We run the risk of having our children believe that stress equals success.

The distracting device which is busyness cannot go on forever. We start to tear apart at the seams. Our inner self is crying out for attention and it becomes rebellious in order to get what it needs. While it looks for compensation, we are moving on to the next thing. Feeding this longing will serve us better than if we try to push right through.

Fulfillment will not find us until we stop, refuel and rebalance as part of a daily practice. Until we stop doing and start being.

Today’s caller, Gulsen, is a very logical and analytical person. She feels motivated only when she is accountable to others.  When she gets home she’s finding it difficult to DO anything. Most intelligent people have a problem with just being so. I guide her through establishing behaviors that will get her where she wants to go.

Get started on your 40-day commitment to yourself by putting one hand on your heart and one hand on your belly. Take deep breaths and bring all of your awareness to your breaths. Imagine you have a volume control in your head and that the volume control represents all of the chatter that is going through your head. Then while breathing, turn the volume down. Listen to this podcast to hear my entire guided meditation.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Are you addicted to busyness? Do you wear it like a badge of honor?
  • Do you feel you should always be doing something?
  • Are you pinpoint on some things but completely give up on other things due to lack of motivation?
  • Is your self-worth measured by how much you are doing?

 

Gulsen’s Question:

Gulsen wants to know why being at home drains her typically motivated and inspired nature.

 

Gulsen’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She pushes herself to the edge 
  • She distracts herself with busyness
  • Her worth and her value come from being, not doing

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • She should make a sanctuary in her home to sit in stillness
  • Trust herself when she is just being
  • She should connect with love every day for 40 days

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Take an inventory of your life
  • Forgive yourself for the misunderstanding that busyness makes you successful
  • Commit to a 40-day practice of meditation or presencing

 

Sponsor:

Onnit Wellness - Receive a 10% discount on your purchase when you order through this link.

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

@christinhassler on twitter

@christinehassler on Instagram

christine@christinehassler.com

Feb 27, 2016

The feeling of being in love is the best. Not to mention the blissful feeling of certainty when we feel like you’ve met “the one” (finally!). You start fantasizing about the future and are convinced that the other person is on the same page you are. And then it ends. And you are not only heartbroken, but shocked because it seemed so right and you don’t understand what went wrong. I know that is not comforting if you are in the pain of a break-up, but understanding why the one you thought was going to be forever ended may offer you some relief. This Coaches Corner will help!

Feb 24, 2016

If you have pattern of being in relationships or going after unavailable people (either emotionally unavailable or still in relationship with others), then this episode is a must listen!! You’ll also lean about what I call “Journey Mate” relationships. 

When we are first starting a relationship we often try to be the person we think we need to be, rather than our most authentic selves. We believe we need to be a certain way in order to keep the other person attracted to us. What we think is love for the other person is actually a projection of the qualities within ourselves we would like to develop.

When the relationship ends before we think it should, even if it doesn’t feel like it at the time, the relationship served us in some way. The other person was a journey mate. Journey mate relationships are a projection of what we need to see in ourselves. If the relationship doesn’t end and we continue sourcing our love from the other person we end up codependent. If this happens we may never fully express ourselves or stand in our power.

I define authenticity as the freedom to be fully expressed. If we are not authentic in our relationships we cannot expect to find the most aligned person for us. More than likely we end up attracting unavailable people who are not ready for commitment.

Steph believes perfection is required of her in her relationships. And since perfection doesn’t exist she experiences Expectation Hangovers, especially in relationships where she feels unable to be her authentic self. Aspiring for perfection has blocked her ability to be emotionally vulnerable. 

If you have a pattern of attracting unavailable people or have just lost someone you thought was the one, listen to this call and Saturday’s Coaches Corner. 

My book Expectation Hangover is now released in paperback and has a new subtitle - Free yourself from your past, change your present and get what you really want. If you don’t have a copy of it yet order it on amazon, audible or enjoy the company of others in a bookstore.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you feel you are living an authentically, self-expressed life?
  • Do you have a pattern of attracting unavailable people?
  • Are you in a relationship with an emotionally unavailable person? Are you an emotionally unavailable person?
  • Do you think you have to be perfect (or a certain way) to get the love you want?

 

Steph’s Question:

Steph finds herself attracted to emotionally unavailable people and it’s hard for her to show her vulnerable side in relationships. She wants to know how to shift to become emotionally available.

 

Steph’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She has a hard time showing her vulnerable side
  • She doesn’t trust love and can’t get it until she fixes herself
  • She sourced loved through someone else
  • She doesn’t feel good enough
  • She is capable of being her authentic self

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • She should come back to what love really is
  • She could accept herself fully and completely
  • Her awareness is the first step of change
  • Write out what perfect and authentic means to her
  • Take a hiatus from dating for a while

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Write down all the things you learned from your journey mate relationship and then turn that on yourself
  • Define authenticity and understand how your most authentic self feels, behaves, communicates and loves
  • Understand where you have walls up around your heart and how you can let people in more

 

Sponsor:

Onnit Wellness - Alpha Brain

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

@christinhassler on twitter

@christinehassler on instagram

christine@christinehassler.com

Feb 20, 2016

I answer this question in this week’s Coaches Corner.  This is an incredibly important episode to listen to so you can figure step into the Truth of Who You REALLY are.

Feb 17, 2016

Criticism seems to have the stickiness factor of super glue and compliments seem to be coated in oil. We allow hurtful things to play over and over in our heads like a broken record, especially when the recording came from a parent or an authority figure. 

We create patterns out of the programming we receive when we are very young. These patterns stay with us throughout our lives until we reprogram ourselves. We can default to these patterns when dealing with situations and we tend to sabotage ourselves with fear instead of motivating ourselves with affirmations. We treat ourselves as others have treated us, instead of how we want to be treated.

If you have a vision to impact other people’s lives, make sure you have saved yourself and let down your own walls first. In order to be transparent, authentic and true, you should become your own best client. How you do anything is how you do everything. 

Today’s conversation with Rich is a lesson in how not to be a victim. Rich has wanted to create a deep emotional impact in people’s lives for some time. He started his own coaching practice over a year ago, and is finding it difficult to deal with the pressure, from his family, to provide for his soon-to-be bride.

For a refresher on this topic, listen to my How to Drop Your Story Coaches Corner. I release my new Coaches Corner episodes every Saturday.  

Online business owners: if you are looking to execute at your highest level, I am a believer and affiliate of Marie Forleo’s B-School. B-School is an 8-week video course, which teaches smart, effective online marketing strategies. If you sign up for the program through my personal link, CH B-School, in addition to the B-School program, I will assist you in the ability to remove your inner blocks with:

  • Four 90-minute live group coaching calls for business and personal aspects
  • Access to a private Facebook group
  • Four custom meditations and visualizations
  • Access to my online programs and courses

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Are you suffering because you cannot identify your purpose? Is there a person in your life who is struggling to find their purpose? Do you push them to find their purpose or try to find it for them?
  • Do you feel worthy and deserving inside? Does your self-confidence or lack thereof, impact your results?
  • Is someone else’s voice inside your head? Do you need to banish it?

 

Rich’s Question:

Rich would like to know how to get over his fear and anxiety to follow through with his goal of becoming a coach. He wants to overcome his limiting beliefs from his past, which may be blocking his future success. 

 

Rich’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • He doesn’t feel worthy or deserving
  • He has fear-based influences
  • His anger and sadness have never been fully released
  • His biggest blocks are his beliefs and unresolved hurts

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • Rich should forgive himself and his stepfather
  • He needs to find his fire and his passion
  • He should work past his fear of rejection
  • He can coach himself through this issue

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Write down your limiting beliefs and figure out who owns the voice
  • Move into compassion for anyone who programmed your thoughts
  • Write a letter to give an unwelcome belief back to the person who gave it to you
  • Be honest about the emotional walls you have put up and be committed to taking them down
  • Set two chairs up and carry out your own therapy session

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Expectation Hangover

@christinhassler on twitter

@christinehassler on Instagram

christine@christinehassler.com

Feb 13, 2016

Breakup.  There is not much that feels worse than heartache from ending a romantic relationship.  Although it feels awful right now, trust that you will be okay.  In this Coaches Corner, I guide you through the five things you can do immediately to ease the pain of your breakup and get to your breakthrough a lot sooner.

Feb 10, 2016

Have you ever had a massive, gut-wrenching, devastating, traumatic breakup that ended a relationship before you wanted the relationship to end? Did you follow it up by an all-consuming expectation hangover? If you are a human being, chances are you have. 

Most people  have at least one issue-based relationship. They attract people who trigger unresolved issues from their past. They value being in a relationship more than they value the lessons of the relationship and repeat the pattern over and over again. They treat being single like a disease, which needs to be cured immediately.

Relationships are an opportunity for us to grow. To find out a little more about whom we really are. When we consider how we feel about what we do instead of just the doing, we have a clearer picture of the qualities we embody.

If a relationship ended before you wanted it to, consider it a rite of passage. Embrace your feelings about it and then put a time limit on your heartbreak. Your heart can hurt but it should be full of unconditional love for yourself. Start falling back in love, but with yourself. Be kind and use your creativity as a channel of expression and healing.

Today’s conversation is with Monika who dares to dream and love in a big way. She moved to a foreign country and a 3 month trip turned into a 2 year stay after falling in love. The relationship ended in betrayal. Feeling her trust is forever broken, she has decided to toughen her heart and use the breakup as an excuse not to move forward with her life.

Remember on Saturdays I release my new Coaches Corner episodes. This week will be on “5 Tips for Getting Over a Breakup”. And if you want to hear about my history on the subject of love, you can listen to my first Over and On with It podcast.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Have you given yourself the diagnosis of heartbroken and feel completely stuck?
  • Did you set a relationship goal that wasn’t realized and now you have an expectation hangover?
  • Do you value a relationship by how long it lasts? So if it ends, do you feel you failed in some way?
  • Is it easy to answer the question “Who are you?” with positive responses?
  • Can you honestly say you feel love for yourself?

 

Monika’s Question:

Monika went through an intense breakup in a foreign country. She feels her trust was crushed; she is now paralyzed by fear and is scared to take the next step forward in her life.

 

Monika’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She’s a people pleaser
  • She doesn’t value herself
  • She attaches her self-worth to achievement
  • Her self-criticism is a habit

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • Trust herself and treat herself like the valuable woman she is
  • Re-direct her thoughts into her improvement
  • Improve her relationship with herself
  • Go deeper into her spiritual practice
  • Do things to make her feel alive and connected
  • She should paint an image of trust

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Focus on how you want to feel about a result rather than the outcome itself
  • Write a list of who you are and use it to fall in love with yourself
  • Start a 40-day practice or discipline to put down your defenses
  • Use your creativity as a channel of expression and healing

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Expectation Hangover

@christinhassler on twitter

@christinehassler on Instagram

christine@christinehassler.com

Feb 6, 2016

In this Coaches Corner I ask you to consider this question: Do you TRULY value yourself? Or…are you discounting yourself by undervaluing your gifts and settling for less than you deserve.  Undervaluing yourself can look like underpricing services, not asking for what you’re worth at work, or staying in relationships that are only kinda sorta what you desire.  This episode will encourage you to own your worth and stand in your value.

Feb 4, 2016

If you want to achieve lasting success you should be concentrating on the who, what and why of your business and let the how naturally unfold with time. Pursuing your business goals without a clear understanding of what makes you uniquely qualified to provide a service (your secret sauce) to a client doesn’t serve anyone. It only wastes time and energy until you have a clear vision.

So often new light workers and entrepreneurs have a list of how they are going to fix things,  step 1 is this and step 2 is that, but coaching is not about fixing people. People embody all the inner resources they need to heal themselves. Coaching is about listening to them from a place of compassion and love. Becoming your own best client and focusing on what you are giving to others is your purpose.  

Becoming an entrepreneur is not an easy task. Fear and uncertainty may be causing you to stall and create blocks when you really just need to start sharing your gift with the world. Your gift holds great value. It is your business to know your value and quit working for free.

Today’s caller, Robby wants to start his coaching business but his vision isn’t clear. He is putting off getting clients until certain things are in place. Fear and uncertainty are suppressing his own inner guidance and creating blocks. We work to uncover his secret sauce and his why.

A good follow up to this episode is my next Coaches Corner - Standing in your Value.

For all of you Mission Driven Entrepreneurs out there - I am an affiliate and a supporter of Marie Forleo’s B-School. B-School is an 8-week video course which teaches smart, effective online marketing strategies. If you sign up for the program through my personal link, CH B-School,  I will gift you

  • Four 90 minute live group coaching calls for business and personal aspects
  • Access to a private Facebook group
  • Four custom meditations and visualizations
  • Access to my online programs and courses

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • What are you creating in your own life?
  • Are you clear about how you are uniquely qualified to do what you do?
  • What is the vision which pulls you toward what you are creating?
  • Does your ego hold you back every time you try to start?
  • Do you have a calling but are waiting for something to start?
  • Do you know which fears and beliefs may be holding you back?
  • Do you believe it’s your job to fix people, help people and care for people?

 

Robby ’s Question:

Robby is starting a coaching business. He believes becoming a coach will require him to be more extroverted. He is experiencing fear and uncertainty of moving forward and has created stalling techniques for himself.

 

Robby ’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • He is creating stalling techniques
  • He hasn’t taken action
  • He wants to get it right, he wants to be perfect
  • He is a good listener
  • He desires personal growth

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • He should ask his intuition what is in the way
  • Bring the focus off of himself and make it about his clients
  • He should drop his high expectations and live his authenticity
  • Understand he is creating value for people
  • He needs to be his best client and keep working in himself

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Dive into your Secret Sauce by identifying the 3 qualities which describe you the most.
  • Get clear on your vision. What is your why?
  • Visualize yourself serving your clients
  • Be your own best client/customer

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler B-School  

Secret Sauce Mastermind

@christinhassler

christine@christinehassler.com

The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks

Jan 30, 2016

My hunch is you are carrying around something that is very heavy and causes you unnecessary suffering.  This thing blocks you from the experiences and connections you desire. It weighs you down, holds you back and robs you of joy. What is this dreadful thing I am talking about? It is your story. And in this episode of Coaches Corner I give you tips on how to let it go!

Jan 27, 2016

If you were to write out your autobiography with the early chapters being on your past and the middle chapters representing the present, what would you change about your current story to get the ending (your future) to turn out just the way you want it to? Would you allow bitterness to leak into your later chapters or would you embrace forgiveness of yourself and those who may have hurt you?

It’s never too late to drop old belief systems and ‘un-program’ yourself. It’s never too late to change. Living as a victim means you do not want to take full responsibility for your life. Becoming the most authentic version of yourself will happen when you move through the process of forgiveness. It will set you free and allow you to live fully in the present.

Today’s caller, Miranda, needed her story to be heard free of judgment and from a place of compassion. She believed she needed to behave a certain way in order to receive love. Her compensatory strategy of being a caretaker, a rescuer, and a people pleaser was attracting toxic people into her life and not bringing her the love she desired.

People in your past can no longer be an excuse for why you don’t have what you want in your present.

If you enjoy this podcast please share on social media and leave a rating or review on iTunes.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • What are you still holding on to from your past that is impacting your present and creating your future?
  • How does Miranda’s story mirror your own?
  • When it comes to getting romantic love, what do you have to do or need to be in order to get it?
  • Is there someone you need to forgive?

 

Miranda’s Question:

Miranda is having trouble letting go of the past and finding forgiveness. She feels she has alienated everyone important in her life with her bitterness. 

 

Miranda’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She should acknowledge her blessings
  • She is attracting toxic people because it’s the only type of love she knows
  • She has made massive judgments about her own choices
  • She tries to get love by being a victim
  • She doesn’t know how to forgive

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • Update your own programming
  • She needs to forgive everyone in her life including herself
  • Find spiritual altitude
  • Start being nicer to herself
  • Work through the behavioral exercises in Expectation Hangover

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Identify your compensatory strategy and shift it
  • Understand the payoffs to the behaviors you don’t like
  • Who do you think you need to forgive?
  • Make a list of your gifts, of all the things you truly love about yourself and make that your new story
  • Know that your past does not need to dictate the present

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Expectation Hangover 

@christinhassler

christine@christinehassler.com

Jan 23, 2016

Do you ever feel anxious?  I suspect your answer is yes – you may even be experiencing it right now. You’re not alone. Here’s the good news: it is 100% possible to ease and actually eliminate anxiety or at the very least dramatically reduce it. I explain and give you lots of tips in this coaches corner.

Jan 20, 2016

The wonderful thing about pain and anxiety is that we have the power to free ourselves from it. Many of the overwhelming feelings we are having now are rooted somewhere in our past. Something devastating caused our young minds to create a program to follow, so we didn’t have to feel that way ever again.

As we grow, the ability to address our fears and overcome our ‘victim story’ becomes available to us. We are able to comfort our younger selves by self-parenting and through work that is healing. We also have the ability to acknowledge our need for protection, thank it for its service to us and move our energy to where we need it now. We can then replace our impulsive responses with our inner voice, which is guided by our intuition.

In between stimulus and response we have a choice and in that choice lies our freedom. – Viktor Frankl - Man’s search for meaning

Our caller, Nicole, is struggling to find her true intuition. She feels it may be lost to her or clouded over by her deep-seated anxiety. She has used her anxiety for many years to protect herself, but now realizes it is time to get over it and on with it so that she could enjoy a deeper life.

My next Retreat in July 2016 will fill up quickly, so if you want more information please contact Jill at jill@christinehassler.com

If you enjoy this podcast, please share on social media and leave a rating or review on iTunes.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you suffer from anxiety? Is there something you would like to be free of?
  • Whenever you try anything new, does it come with a lot of fear?
  • Do you prefer control over uncertainty?
  • Did something happen in your past that might still be impacting you, but you are not sure what to do about it?

 

Nicole’s Question:

Nicole has anxiety-driven panic attacks and lacks self-confidence. She longs to have a deeper life and become connected to the world.    

 

Nicole’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She uses her anxiety as a source of protection
  • She needs to feel she is in control of a situation
  • As a child, she felt vulnerable
  • Intuition will be clearer when anxiety subsides
  • She needs to respond rather than react
  • It’s OK for her to make mistakes

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • She should tell her younger self “things will be alright”
  • Say “I accept” & then “I am choosing to”
  • Interrupt the patterns of anxiety
  • Turn up the volume of her calm inner voice
  • Understand the difference between resignation and acceptance

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Think about the “big deals” or significant events in your life. What belief systems were formed then that might be impacting you today?
  • Tell yourself the things you needed to hear during your “big deals”
  • Understand that it was not your fault
  • How does your protective mechanism serve you? Give it a new job description

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Expectation Hangover 

@christinhassler

christine@christinehassler.com

jill@christinehassler.com to sign up for the Bali retreat

 

Jan 16, 2016

Do you find that you have taken on the expectation that you are supposed to be happy all the time? Sure, eternal happiness sounds awesome, yet this expectation that we “should” be able to be in a positive place all the time can be the very thing that eludes us from actually experiencing it. How? Well, when we pressure or force ourselves to be a certain way, which involves avoiding the reality of our current feelings, we engage in what is called “spiritual bypass.” Spiritual bypass is a process of attempting to high-vibe yourself out of what you perceive as a negative feeling instead of allowing yourself to feel it and heal it. Don’t get me wrong – joy, love and peace are our essence, but if you haven’t noticed we are all still human and have moments of where that is not exactly our experience. In this Coaches Corner I encourage you to accept the contrast of your human experience and offer tips for how to move through those not-so-happy moments.

Jan 13, 2016

Advertisements, movies and even fairy tales will tell you a product, money or a prince are all you need to live happily ever after. Sorry, that is not true. External things are not the key to a happy life.

Because happiness is an inside job, we are all capable of self-generating the feeling of happiness. If we move to acceptance , we will recognize that the source of our own happiness comes from within.

We ARE capable of living our lives contently. But first, we must examine what we are devoted to and look into the places in our lives where being grateful of what we already have can elevate us to acceptance. It is normal for humans to lead lives full of ebbs and flows.

Our caller, Jennifer, is putting pressure on herself to figure out her entire life even though she is only 24 years old. She has an expectation hangover about not being where she thinks she should be in her career. She is waiting for something external to bring her happiness and to spark her passion.

People with high expectations tend to not feel happy more often. Listen to this week’s Coaches Corner – Is it possible to be happy all the time? – for an in-depth look at the secret sauce to overcoming an expectation hangover.

My Bali Retreat, in September 2016, will fill up quickly so if you want more information please contact Jill at jill@christinehassler.com

If you enjoy this podcast please share it on social media and leave a rating or review on iTunes.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Which “if then” and “if when” equations have you set up to define your own happiness?
  • Do you think you should be further along in your life?
  • Do you think it’s too late to be happy?
  • Are you feeling depressed in your life and expecting something to come and save you?

Jennifer’s Question:

Jennifer feels stuck. She tries new things but gives up on them easily. She wants to know when the spark will come to keep her from feeling lost and unhappy.

Jennifer’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She pretends she can find happiness outside herself
  • Surrounding herself with people she loves brings her happiness
  • She wants things to come to her without working for them
  • She hasn’t taken action to keep herself from being disappointed
  • She is not supposed to figure out her entire life by 25

How to get over it and on with it:

  • Realize happiness is a moment, not a permanent state
  • Have low attachment and high involvement
  • She can create the feeling of happiness anytime she wants
  • Accept herself, quirks and all
  • Take a comedy or an improv class
  • Make two people at work smile every day

Tools and Takeaways:

  • What will it take for you to fully accept your life as it is right now?
  • Stop trying to do things. Either do something or don’t. There is no in between.
  • Do what you need to do to de-blah yourself and get your mojo back on.
  • Create happiness on the inside by starting with gratitude
  • Be a happiness ambassador
  • Physically connect with people

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Expectation Hangover 

@christinhassler

christine@christinehassler.com

jill@christinehassler.com to sign up for the Bali retreat

« Previous 1 2 3 4 5 Next »