Christine responds to questions from listeners. The first topic is around how to set healthy boundaries and break toxic patterns with family members. The second question is regarding whether avoiding disappointment is possible. Listen in as Christine talks about dealing with “Expectation Hangovers” and how to purse goals without setting yourself up for a let down.
Join Christine and Aubrey Marcus for a retreat open to men and women: LOVE, PRACTICE MAKES THE MASTER. https://www.eventbrite.com/e/love-practice-makes-the-master-tickets-33443861490
Dealing with disappointment? Want to learn how to transform what Christine calls an “Expectation Hangover” into a massive opportunity for growth? Be sure to get her latest book here:https://www.amazon.com/Expectation-Hangover-Overcoming-Disappointment-Work/dp/1608682412
This episode is about taking steps towards your dream. Today’s caller, Daniel, is passionate, and his enthusiasm is contagious when he talks about his music. When he deviates from his dream to take jobs just to pay the bills, he gets depressed. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode85] I like to say, dreams are actually our inner psychic knowing what is to come to us. Things we feel called to, from our heart. How do we know what is coming from our hearts and what is coming from our ego? Get clear about it by reading my What’s the Difference Between Sacrifice and Compromise? Vlog post. Our head has wants; our heart has desires. When we are not listening to our heart or we are not pursuing the things we love, a part of us may start engaging in self-sabotaging behavior. It's important to not have the soul sucked out of us. Feed your soul and do things to fulfill your creativity and your passion. Don't let anything suck the soul out of you! Aubrey Marcus and I are facilitating a 3-day retreat in Austin, Texas over Memorial Day weekend for men and women. If you don’t know Aubrey, go back and listen to the Coaches Corner, Go For Your Win. He is a seeker who appreciates consciousness above all else. The focus of the retreat is Love: Practice Makes the Master. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● What are your dreams? Are you giving yourself permission to pursue them? ● Have other people’s doubts or comments about your dreams prevented you from listening to your own inner guidance? ● Do you have a limiting belief that you are too old, too unqualified, or too poor to go after what you want? ● If you are in pursuit of a dream, are you actively and consistently taking steps toward it? Daniel's Question: Daniel wants to know which action steps he should take to pursue his dreams. Daniel's Key Insights and Ahas: ● He feels pressure to get a regular job. ● He is a perfectionist. ● He doesn’t know if he is practical or irrational. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● He should go for it 100%; get his work out there, and identify people to emulate. ● He should put together a demo reel. ● He should hustle for a year before making a decision about additional schooling. ● He should compose his personal mantra. Action Steps: ● What is your dream? ● Are you going after your dream? If not, why not? What is your excuse? ● What is one action step you can take to move toward it? ● Post your action step as a comment to the show notes so that I may root you on! Resources: Christine Hassler What’s the Difference Between Sacrifice and Compromise vlog post Christine Hassler Podcasts Expectation Hangover Inner Circle Membership Community Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Jill@Christinehassler.com Love: Practice Makes the Master Retreat Upwork Elance
Listen to this reassuring message from Christine that will remind you of the truth of who you are.
This episode is about not feeling good enough. Today’s caller, Jen, knows it is not good to believe she is not good enough, but she feels her problem is insurmountable. The essence of who Jen is isn’t broken, it’s just a pattern she’s comfortable in. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode84] Jen is experiencing a limiting belief. It shows up in a variety of ways, like her feeling not deserving, feeling broken, or not being lovable. It can lead to insecurity, people pleasing, body image issues, eating disorders, and accepting dysfunctional relationships. During the call, I allow Jen to go on for a while because I am waiting for her to ask for help. For those of you who are being coached or in therapy — If you are more committed to keeping your story than to truly letting go of it, you are uncoachable. We all get attached to our limiting beliefs, because they are familiar, comfortable, and often get us the attention we are seeking and the validation or sympathy for how hard life is. There is merit to discussing our past, and healing memories. But, we must do it with vulnerability, compassion, and forgiveness so we can let it go, to get over it and on with what we want to create. Awareness without action is merely psychological entertainment. Aubrey Marcus and I are facilitating a 3-day retreat in Austin, Texas over Memorial Day weekend. If you don’t know Aubrey go back and listen to the Coaches Corner, Go For Your Win. He is a seeker who appreciates consciousness above all else. The focus of the retreat is becoming masterful at love. Sign up for this incredible retreat. Email Jill@ChristineHassler.com about joining my Inner Circle membership community. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Do you struggle with not feeling good enough? Do you doubt you are worthy or capable of having the things you truly want? ● When you get close to the things you want, do you often sabotage it or doubt you can keep it? ● Do you make your ‘enoughness’ conditional? Jen's Question: Jen wants to know how to move past her past traumas, and change her narrative. Jen's Key Insights and Ahas: ● She is holding on to an old pattern because it’s comfortable. ● She believes her failed relationships and loss of friends is her fault. ● She withdraws and isolates herself. ● She gets her value from external validation. ● She is not seeing her life accurately. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● She needs to commit to shifting and interrupting her ingrained patterns. ● She can stop her thoughts of not being good enough, and create a new neural net. ● She should take a lesson from the children she works with. ● She should get a photo of her younger self and talk to it. ● She should create of voice memo of positive sayings to herself. Assignments: ● How attached are you to your story? Stop telling your sob story. ● Practice release writing to release emotions. ● Stop your thoughts and redirect them with the help of the ‘Whoaing’ technique in Expectation Hangover. ● Get a picture of your little one and use it as a way to generate love and self-acceptance. Sponsor: Audible — Free audiobook download and a 30-day free trial. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Expectation Hangover Inner Circle Membership Community Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Jill@Christinehassler.com Love: Practice Makes the Master Retreat
Jennifer is a therapist who is feeling physically depleted after working with clients. Christine gives her best tips for protecting her energy and serving people in a way that is energizing, not depleting. James is 54 years old and has worked at the same office job for three decades. He is interested in shifting to becoming self-employed but is disappointed he has not been able to get his new career off the ground. Listen in as Christine addresses both these topics. Links mentioned: Love: Practice Makes the Master! Join Christine and Aubrey Marcus for an empowering and transformational retreat in Austin. https://www.eventbrite.com/e/love-practice-makes-the-master-tickets-33443861490 EP 83: Letting Go of Parental “Mistakes” with Cathy. Make sure to listen to this episode to hear Christine talk about the difference between sympathy and compassion.h christinehassler.com/2017/04/episode83/
This episode is about breaking the cycle of generational patterns. Today’s caller, Cathy, experienced corporal punishment as a child, and finds herself doing the same thing to her daughter. As you listen to the call, I hope you are able to separate her character from her behavior. Her behavior is a reaction to her past. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode83] I’ve said many times, parenting does not come with an instruction manual. Often, we play out behaviors we learned from our parents. It requires a conscious awareness to know what behaviors we want to leave in the past, and which we pass on to our children. We need to have deep compassion for our parents and then forgive them, to stop repeating generational patterns. Stopping the cycle entails awareness, healing of our past hurts, and then the reparenting of ourselves to become the loving parent we never had. Abuse continues because the victim never heals. The victim either becomes the abuser or internalizes the abuse. Often, people do not share about past abuse, because there is so much shame. This is not just true for abuse, it is for any generational pattern. Coaches Tip — When clients share things that are hard to hear, don't go into judgment or sympathy. If you catch yourself doing so, say, "I forgive myself for judging or feeling sorry for this person," then shift back into compassion. Aubrey Marcus and I are facilitating a 3-day retreat in Austin, Texas over Memorial Day weekend. If you don’t know Aubrey, he is the CEO & Founder of the human optimization company, ONNIT. The focus of the retreat will be about Mastering Love, for men and women. Email Jill@ChristineHassler.com about joining my Inner Circle membership community. Keep These Distinctions in Mind: ● Acceptance versus judgment. ● Compassion versus sympathy. Cathy's Question: Cathy wants to understand how she may have adversely affected her daughter's self-esteem. Cathy's Key Insights and Ahas: ● She feels she made mistakes with her first daughter. ● She finds herself going back to the parenting tactics of her parents. ● She didn't like being a girl growing up. ● Her daughter is mirroring her. ● She has unresolved issues from her childhood. ● Her mother didn't defend her. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● She should talk to her younger self through a photo, and tell herself she did not deserve the punishment she received. ● She should work with a counselor or a coach who has experience with childhood traumas. ● Research parenting and discipline tools. ● When she gets triggered, she should practice giving herself a time out. Assignments: ● Get a picture of little you and commit to sending love to the little boy or girl inside of you. ● If you are aware of your need for healing, get professional to walk you through it. ● If you find yourself triggered by something, give yourself a time out. ● Use the scientist technique of Expectation Hangover and become an observer in your life. ● Consider what patterns you want to pass along to your children, and which ones you want to break the cycle of. ● Read Family Secrets by John Bradshaw and Conscious Parenting by Shefali Tsabary.
Ready to end the vicious battle with food and stop hating your body? Then you’ll love this talk Christine has with Samantha Skelly, founder of “Hungry for Happiness” Samantha also mentioned her program that will take you on a healing journey to end your battle with food and find self acceptance. You can learn more about her course and community here: http://hungryforhappiness.com/ChristineHassler
This episode is about overcoming the pain our inner bullies create. Today’s caller, Ravi, was bullied as a child, and uses his inner critic as a protective measure. He became isolated and disconnected from his intuition, and he cut off listening to his heart because he didn’t want to feel. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode82] When we cut off our feelings we not only cut off the pain, but we cut off the love and inspiration as well. What happened in the past does not have to create your future. You can get over it and on with it, but you must be consciously committed to letting it go. To transform, you need love, wisdom, and compassion from your heart, and alchemy. I guided Ravi through a heart meditation, like this one from a Coaches Corner episode. Ravi experienced clarity after the meditation. His heart said it wanted expression through art. The next step was to transform his trauma and pain, but Ravi said he didn’t want to go there. Remember, the fear of feeling pain is what keeps you from transforming it. It is possible to alchemize passion, or suffering, into something you love. It takes a lot of energy to suppress pain. If you have had trauma, it can be scary to go there on your own. You should find someone to work with, someone who can go there with you to hold a space for you. The more you listen to your heart, the more it speaks to you! Join me this September at my retreat in Bali. Visiting a magical place with like-minded people will transform your mind, body, and spirit. It’s a unique experience where you can experience significant healing that will last the rest of your life. Email Jill@ChristineHassler.com to sign up. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Are you trying to figure out your issues or challenges in your head? ● Were you bullied, teased or criticized as a child or a teenager, and it still haunts you today? ● Do you have a past trauma you are terrified to address and feel? ● Would you say you live more in your head than in your heart? Ravi's Question: Ravi wants to know how to find purpose in his life. Ravi's Key Insights and Ahas: ● He disconnected from his conscious mind to cope with the trauma. ● He internalizes the external bullying. ● He’s scared of failure and being made fun of. ● He has managed his pain, but has not yet transformed it. ● He is in an avoidance pattern and protective mode. ● He’s been in the midst of self-loathing. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● He should tap into the passion he experienced to create art. ● He could help other people who have been bullied. ● He needs to listen to his heart. ● He needs to start alchemizing his pain. ● He should practice release writing when he feels sadness. Assignments: ● Read The Lesson Quest and Your Life’s Purpose in Chapter 9, The Spiritual Level in Expectation Hangover. ● Be honest about what you are attempting to figure out, and alchemize it. ● Listen to my Coaches Corner with Jim Kwik. ● Volunteer and be of service to someone else to help you with your inner critic. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Over It and On With It Listener Survey Expectation Hangover Inner Circle Membership Community Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Jill@Christinehassler.com for Bali Retreat Information Bali Retreat Enrollment Page
This episode ROCKS!! Listen to Jim share some brain-changing tips that will change your life. Get ready to take some notes and have your mind blown in the best possible way as Jim shares tips for learning, improving memory, rewiring your brain, and altering your self-talk. Learn more about Jim and get some free goodies here: https://kwiklearning.com/ And check out his Kwik brain podcast here: https://kwikbrain.com/podcast