Over It And On With It

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CC: What is Breath Work, Who is it For and How Does it Help? 0

Nov 5, 2022

Christine's husband Stef who is a breathwork facilitator joins her to talk about the incredibly powerful modality of breathwork. Learn more about what breathwork is and how it may help you to tap into deeper levels of healing and freedom.

If you want to join Stef and Christine for their next breathwork event, go here: https://stefanossifandos.com/feminine/

And if you are interested in their breathwork and meditation program, go here: https://christinehassler.com/breathwork

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EP 373: Listening to Your Gut Even When Other People Disagree with Hannah 0

Nov 2, 2022

This episode is about trusting our intuition and keeping others’ voices out of our heads. Today’s caller, Hannah, has made a clear decision to do something for herself. Yet, doubts are creeping in due to the opinions of others. If you have a gut feeling about something and other people are doubting you or you want to get to the place where you can trust your own inner knowing, this call will be extremely helpful.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode373]

You do not owe anyone an explanation for your decisions. If your decisions directly impact others, then a discussion is necessary. But, when you make personal decisions that only impact you, it is nobody else’s business but yours.

And on the flip side, we need to respect other people’s choices even if we wouldn’t make the same ones.

When people are not respecting our boundaries, it is imperative we create a distance from them. And, just because someone is a family member, doesn’t give them the right to have unlimited opinions about our lives and to know everything about us. Other people’s voices should not be louder than our own intuition.

Join Stefanos live for Breathwork for the Feminine. It is designed for women only. Stefanos leads the breathwork and then he and Christine both do coaching and processing afterward. Join them live in Austin on November 7th, 2022, from 6‒9 CST, or join virtually — Go to Stefanossifandos.com/feminine to register.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Have you recently made a decision that others are doubting and you wonder if you should be doubting it yourself?
Do you have a habit of people-pleasing, being a chameleon, or going against what you want?
Do you doubt that you have intuition and don’t know how to connect to it?
Do you need to have stronger boundaries with certain people in your life?

Hannah’s Question:

Hannah is on the brink of a scheduled surgery. She knows this is the right choice for her but would like clarity about the pressure she feels.

Hannah’s Key Insights and Ahas:

She’s never wanted children.
She has a tubal ligation procedure scheduled.
Her inner voice is telling her she is broken.
She’s done personal development work for some time.
She is the only child in her family who isn’t married or doesn’t want children.
Having the procedure feels self-honoring.
Others around her question her judgment.
She struggles when making decisions for herself.
She feels pressure about not having rights over her body.
She felt a sense of relief after making a decision.
This may be the first decision she has made based on what she wants.
She is a people-pleaser.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

Make choices without checking in with others.
Stop putting her needs aside in favor of the needs of others.
Practice making quicker decisions and go with her gut.

Takeaways:

Stay out of other people’s business.
Keep others out of your business.
Listen to your gut.
Don’t let people’s voices be louder than your own voice.

Sponsor:

Caraway Cookware — is good looking, clean cooking. Caraway cookware is beautiful, easy to clean and use and it is non-toxic. It has a naturally slick ceramic surface and comes in cookware and bakeware sets. Go to CarawayHome.com/Overit to take advantage of the exclusive 10% off limited-time offer and use Overit at checkout.

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Download this Episode

CC: A Loving Reminder from Christine 0

Oct 29, 2022

Have you forgotten who you truly are? Are you caught up in some self-doubt, guilt, loneliness, sadness or disappointment? Could you use a reminder of how lovable you are? Then don't miss this episode where Christine speaks straight to your heart.

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EP 372: How to Love Yourself Without Ever Being Taught What Love Really Is with Jada 0

Oct 26, 2022

This episode is about how loving actions help us heal. Today’s caller, Jada, was never shown love in childhood and wants to know how she can learn to love herself. When we don’t have loving stable parenting, we are at a disadvantage. But, people who have had a disadvantaged childhood and have done the work to heal it, find a force, love, and momentum that is unstoppable.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode372]

Growing up without a role model for what love feels like is akin to growing up in a house with only one language. Would you expect yourself to speak another language naturally? Would it just appear in your brain? No. When we don’t have models for what love is, it is hard to access love; it is hard to know what true healthy love is without other people. It makes it hard to access self-love as well.

When something bad happens, many people say that the experience has made them stronger and more resilient. But what that translates to is the experiences they endured created walls to protect their heart so they never really let love in because they are scared to death of being hurt again. For many people who had difficult childhoods, there is a lot of anger and grief they never got to feel.

When we are healing trauma it is not about going back and reliving the experience. It’s about giving ourselves the voice we never had. When looking at self-love, we have to take actions that signify self-care and actions that signify that we are being good to ourselves. That is the first step in learning how to love ourselves.

Love is a feeling that we can access through actions.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Do you want to love yourself but you are not sure how?
Did you have a traumatic childhood full of chaos and without a role model of love?
Do you question if you will get over your past?
Could it be possible that you are doing loving things but you don't even know it?

Jada’s Question:

Jada grew up without a role model of what love is and would like guidance on how to find genuine self-love.

Jada’s Key Insights and Ahas:

She feels anxiety when telling her story.
She was abused and didn’t have love in her childhood.
She feels unworthy and undeserving of love.
She wants to turn her memories into something else.
She has done self-work for three years.
She is repressing anger.
She wants love and support.
Her inner child craves unconditional love.
She recognizes how her lack of self-love shows up in her life.
She is tired of how her childhood has affected her.
She does not go into victim.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

Discontinue trying to find beauty in the trauma.
Take the time to process her emotions.
Recognize that love; she may not know how to feel self-love but she knows what loving actions are.
Give herself credit for how far she’s come.
Know that as she continues on this healing path she will propel forward.
Find a seasoned therapist so she doesn’t have to do healing alone.

Sponsor:

Organifi — is a healthy and easy way to get the nutrients you need. The body needs both macro and micronutrients for optimal health. Organifi’s Green Juice includes Moringa which is known as nature’s most powerful multivitamin. For 20% off your order use the code 'OVERIT’ to receive 20% off your order.

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Download this Episode

EP 371: How to Move Into Acceptance Even If You Don’t Like What is Happening with Lindsey 0

Oct 19, 2022

This episode is about accepting where we are in life and enjoying it to the fullest. Today’s caller, Lindsey, has wanted to find a partner to share her life with for a long time. She has done personal development work but still believes she needs to fix herself before calling in a partner. We work through ways she can trust life, trust divine timing, and enjoy her life.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode371]

When we have hindsight, it is easy to move into acceptance. We look back and consider that something happened for a reason it makes it easier to accept. When we have to accept something, or we choose to accept something that isn’t what we want, that is when the real spiritual ninja work comes in.

The constant trying to figure out why — which is something we all do to some degree — we don’t have something we want or something in our life isn’t working. We pick ourselves apart with a fine-toothed comb trying to find the reason. Because if we find the reason, it gives us control and then we can do something to solve it. It is a pattern of constantly looking.

Acceptance is when we move into the peace of what is. It is when we stop wishing for something to be different or when we have feelings about circumstances not being what we want, we don’t bypass them. Resignation is when we give up. Acceptance has relief energy. When we surrender we can be open to something shifting.

When we move into full acceptance of who we are and where we are in our lives, the acceptance keeps us in the energetic of love and shifts what we are broadcasting.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Is there something you want badly and think you will be happier when you get it?
Are you single and don’t want to be single but you can’t move into acceptance of it?
Have you done work to change an issue or circumstance but it isn’t shifting and you keep trying?
Do you believe your life would be better if you had something you don’t?

Lindsey’s Question:

Lindsey has been single for most of her life and would like guidance on how to call in a partner.

Lindsey’s Key Insights and Ahas:

She has been single for 10+ years but wants to call in a partner.
She is an adventurous woman in life and work.
She has a belief that men find her good enough to sleep with but not good enough to date.
She believes she would be better in a relationship.
She is sad because she doesn’t have a partner.
She feels she has no control over finding a partner and pities herself.
She feels looked over by the people in her life.
She has limiting beliefs about herself.
She is constantly doing to not think about the uncertainty of life.
She believes that if she doesn’t work hard to get something she won’t get it.
She is incorporating practices to keep herself present.
She surrenders in water and with music.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

Accept where she is right now.
Move toward acceptance and let go of wanting something else.
Make a playlist of songs that make her love her life in the now.
Stop herself from going down a spiral.
Stop trying to fix something that isn’t broken.
Trust life and trust divine timing.

Takeaways:

You can’t always get what you want but you can get what you need. If we can move into acceptance of wherever we are or are not, we have more enjoyment and freedom in our life.

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Download this Episode

CC: Reprogramming and Breaking your Circuits 0

Oct 15, 2022

If you feel like you have done lots of personal development work yet certain patterns or issues keep coming back, then don't miss this episode! Christine explains why you must plant flowers after you weed your consciousness and break circuits that are currently running your mental programming.

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EP 370: How to Access Your Sensuality with Amanda 0

Oct 12, 2022

This episode is about the protective patterns we create when we don’t feel safe. Today’s caller, Amanda, says she wants guidance on how to access her sensuality but the core issue is truly about how she can feel safe and be vulnerable. We can’t feel safe in our sexuality or sensuality unless we feel safe in our vulnerability.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode370]

When women don’t feel safe in their bodies we tend to go into our heads. We talk, talk, talk, and don’t notice what is going on in our bodies. As human beings, we are a combination of doing and being, flowing and going, masculine and feminine, sensual and productive, right and left. So, one of our biggest turn-ons is safety. If we feel safe, we can let go. If we don’t feel safe, forget about it. We need to learn that it is safe to feel and to be emotionally vulnerable.

When we attempt to make changes while in frustration, it is important to shift into vulnerability and full self-expression. We need to accept all aspects of ourselves. Sensuality can feel scary because it feels out of control when we keep our safe place in our heads.

When we don’t feel safe, we have protective patterns that frustrate us. We judge the patterns and try to change them. But, nothing heals judgment. The first step of healing is to love, accept, and thank the pattern for protecting us.

If you don’t feel safe expressing yourself emotionally, you won’t feel safe expressing yourself sensually and sexually. When an expression is muted, all expressions are muted.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Do you feel blocked from your sensuality? Would you like to be more expressed in your life, especially sexually?
Did you have the space to be expressed as a child? Was vulnerability encouraged in your house or did you have to hide or numb your feelings or deal with them on your own?
Are you in a relationship and feel inhibited with your own partner?
Do people in your life give you feedback that they would like to be closer to you? Do you feel your relationships could be deeper but you are scared to go there?

Amanda’s Question:

Amanda feels shame and guilt when it comes to sensuality and would like guidance on how to embody her sexuality without guilt and to feel good.

Amanda’s Key Insights and Ahas:

She will be 40 this year.
She is in a loving, committed relationship.
As a child, she was raised Christian and was taught to believe that “good girls don’t” do certain things.
She wants to let go of things that don’t serve her.
She feels awkward when expressing her sensual self.
Feeling uncomfortable and numb stems from her childhood.
She doesn’t feel safe being vulnerable.
People care about her and want to be honest with her.
She wants to break the pattern.
She commits to being in her body and creating opportunities to be emotionally vulnerable.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

Remind herself that it is safe to feel.
Feel her discomfort but also feel she is safe.
Practice vulnerability.
Write three questions to evoke emotional vulnerability.
Recreate an opportunity to be fully expressed.
Forgive herself for judging herself and being hard on herself.

Takeaways:

If you want to be more sensually or sexually expressed, look at how emotionally expressed you are.
Do you make safe spaces for your sensuality?

Sponsors:

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Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Download this Episode

EP 369: How to Deal with Those Things You Really Don’t Like About Your Partner with Daria 0

Oct 5, 2022

This episode is about upper limiting and discerning deal breakers versus growth opportunities in relationships. Everything seems to be finally working out for today’s caller, Daria, but she is having difficulty accepting it and her fiance. She asks for guidance on how to break existing patterns to make sure she doesn’t self-sabotage herself or her relationship.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode369]

It is very common that once we start to get the things we want, we start to wonder if we deserve them and if they are fleeting. We often have unexpected feelings when things start to go well.

When the hormones and infatuation of a new relationship wear off, in the realness of a relationship, there may be things about our partner that we don’t like. In most relationships, there are things about our partners we just don’t like and that we want to change. These things fall into several categories but more definitive would be to think of them as deal breakers or growth opportunities.

There are some things about our partner that we need to decide if it is truly annoying or not. Focusing on what we love about our partners and accepting them for who they are can go a long way. We can choose to focus on the great things about our partners.

When we want to request a change of behavior from our partner, they must feel safe in the relationship.

My Women’s Retreat is this weekend, October 7‒9, 2022 in Austin. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat to get more information about this gentle and nourishing life-changing opportunity. Whatever your issue or concern there is a place for you.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Are you sure about your relationship? You don’t have doubts but there are some things about your partner you wish they would change.
Do you tend to have high standards and wonder if you are settling?
Are you good at communicating what you need in a relationship? Or, maybe you are not as good at it as you think you are?
Are you willing to be the change you want to see in the relationship?

Daria’s Question:

Daria is feeling a sudden change of feelings toward her fiance and would like guidance to ensure she doesn’t self-sabotage.

Daria’s Key Insights and Ahas:

She is upper limiting herself.
She discovered her ex-husband deceived her.
Her upbringing drastically changed when her mother got sick.
She loves her fiance.
She feels herself pulling away from her partner.
She wishes he could be more of a grownup with her.
She feels comfortable asking for things from him but feels she has to do it constantly.
She loves his sense of playfulness and is a good friend to people.
She is not sure when she is trying to change her partner or change the things he does.
She is trying to learn how to deal with him and her feelings.
Her relationship feels lopsided.
She wants to make the relationship work.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

Read The Big Leap: Conquer Your Hidden Fear and Take Life to the Next Level by Gay Hendricks.
Get turned on by the things she loves about her partner.
Realize her fiance feels her come-and-go energy and it can make him feel unsafe.
To break her pattern, consider when and how she can lean into how much she loves him.
Trust life and know that it is safe to be happy.

Takeaways:

Experiment with a person who annoys you. For one week, choose to only recognize the amazing things you like about them.

Sponsors:

Caraway Cookware — Now that I am cooking for my baby I want to make sure I have the least amount of toxins in my house. Caraway cookware is beautiful, easy to clean and use and it is non-toxic. It has a naturally slick ceramic surface and comes in cookware and bakeware sets. Go to CarawayHome.com/Overit to take advantage of the exclusive 10% off limited-time offer and use Overit at checkout.

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Download this Episode

CC: How To Be Loving with Danielle LaPorte 0

Oct 1, 2022

Author, speaker, teacher and force of love Danielle LaPorte joins Christine to dive deep into inner child work, forgiveness, radiance, choosing higher quality thoughts and so much more.

Make sure to get her new book How To Be Loving: As Your Heart is Breaking Open and Our
World is Waking Up which is a nuanced perspective on the life-changing power of
Self Compassion, shadow work and being more receptive
to Higher Guidance. This is a guide on how to use the
genius of your heart to create conditions for healing.

Learn more at https://daniellelaporte.com/

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EP 368: Owning How You May Have Hurt or Traumatized Your Children as the Parent with Carrie 0

Sep 28, 2022

This episode is about being the parent you always wanted and wanted to be. Today’s caller, Carrie, wants to repair a strained relationship with her children. She feels shame about her past behaviors and wants guidance on how to build a connection with them and their children. There is a lot of vulnerability and courage in this honest conversation.

It can be scary to be a generational pattern breaker and it takes a lot of courage to follow through but it can transform our relationships.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode368]

Many parents carry around a silent shame about some of the choices they made as parents. Parenting is hard. It doesn’t come with a manual. Creating a healthy environment for our children is challenging when we don’t have good parenting ourselves. We are still impacted by our trauma and our hurt; it can feel impossible not to pass it on.

The hard part about trauma, or behavior we categorize as hurtful or bad, is that it is not due to anyone setting out to hurt another person. People who have unprocessed trauma and don’t know how to deal with it. People who are hurt and sad all the time haven’t gotten to their anger. People who are angry and explosive haven’t gotten to their hurt and sadness.

What happens with parent-child relationships is the hurt parent wants a two-way street. Meaning, the hurt parent wants the child to make it okay for them as well, but that is not the child’s job. It is the parent’s job to make it okay for the child.

Give your children the opportunity to hear the things they always wanted to hear.

Register for my upcoming Women’s Retreat which will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat to get more information about this gentle and nourishing life-changing opportunity. Whatever your issue or concern there is a place for you.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Are you a parent that has guilt or shame about how you parented or how you treated your child or children?
Do you know that you are passing on generational patterns and trauma? Have you told yourself you would never do it yet you find yourself doing it?
Do you have a strained or strange relationship with one of your children that you want to remedy? You want to have a connection with them but you are not sure how.
Do you trust yourself enough to parent yourself in a way that can help you parent your child better, and your adult children who still need parenting?

Carrie’s Question:

Carrie was a parent who inflicted trauma on her children. She would like guidance on how to repair their relationship.

Carrie’s Key Insights and Ahas:

She was a single mother.
Her children were teenagers when she made regrettable decisions.
She acted in ways that made her children feel unsafe.
Inconsistent behaviors were common while she was raising her children.
She is a full-time traveler.
Her children don’t acknowledge her as family.
Her children’s father isn’t accessible.
She feels shame about repeating the actions of her parents.
She fears triggering her daughter when around her grandchildren.
Her daughter doesn’t reach out to her.
She doesn’t want to hear what her daughter may say to her.
She fears confronting her anger.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

Trust that it is time to remove her shame.
Step into her mama bear and expect more from herself as a mother.
Have a heart-to-heart conversation, apologize to her daughter, and listen and love her.
Allow herself to feel her sadness.
Do the Anger Release process.

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Download this Episode

EP 367: Should I Stay in the Relationship for the Baby? With Cassie 0

Sep 21, 2022

This episode is about navigating a relationship with a new baby coming. Today’s caller, Cassie, is about to have a child but is uncertain about staying with the baby’s father. She would like guidance about how to feel supported emotionally and financially during this trying time.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode367]

It is difficult enough for women who are becoming new mothers but for them to not have support can be really challenging. But, on the other hand, couples who stay together for the children who are not in a healthy relationship don’t have kids that turn out any better than the kids whose parents got divorced. Kids pick up on unhealthy relationships when they are not aligned and may model their future relationships on them.

When a baby comes, it transforms and changes a relationship. The focus of attention is on the baby and not as much on the partners. That is why it is important to have clear agreements in place about parenting responsibilities before a child is born.

I’m excited about my upcoming Women’s Retreat which will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat to get more information about this life-changing opportunity. Whatever your issue or concern there is a place for you.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Are you in a relationship and you don’t know whether to stay or go?
Do you have children and you are concerned the relationship isn’t a fit and you don’t know if you should stay in it for the children?
Do you feel your partner isn’t holding up their end of the agreement? financially, personal development, or any other way?
Do you have clear agreements with your partner so each of you knows what you can expect and count on from each other to prevent expectation hangovers?

Cassie’s Question:

Cassie is pregnant with her partner of 2-plus years. She is having some difficulty in her relationship and would like guidance on whether or not to leave the relationship.

Cassie’s Key Insights and Ahas:

She is seven months pregnant.
Her pregnancy has highlighted some of her fears about her relationship.
She is unsure if her intuition is telling her to step away from the relationship.
She is excited about becoming a mother.
She and her partner have different values around money.
She is confused about her next steps.
Her partner wants to be in the relationship.
Her partner recently left his career.
She feels emotionally distressed from their disagreements.
She wants her partner to monetarily provide for the family.
She is not yet sure about what agreements she will need to clarify.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

Get clear agreements from her partner about the upcoming parenting responsibilities.
Consider how she can respond to his requests without anger or resentment.
Recognize that she is a co-parent with her partner.
Appeal to her partner’s heart about the parenting and healing opportunity.
Pay attention to the things she appreciates and loves about her partner.

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Download this Episode

CC: Five Reminders You May Just Need to Hear 0

Sep 17, 2022

Christine shares five reminders that may come at the perfect time for you. If you are disappointed with something in your life, judging yourself, lacking in self-care, don't feel like all the "work" you are doing is paying off, or just need some inspiration today - don't miss this episode!

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EP 366: They Said — Part 3 of a 3-part Couples Coaching Series with Rory & Tyler 0

Sep 14, 2022

This episode is a couple’s coaching session with the partners currently experiencing struggles in their relationship. Rory & Tyler have listened to their partner’s individual sessions and spoken with each other about what they heard. Christine discusses strategies and opportunities the couple can use to move their relationship forward.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode366]

Relationships are challenging. It is generally easy in the first year when there is infatuation and hormones but afterward comes the depth, transformation, and healing. In any relationship, struggles and doubts are normal and natural. It is important to uncover where the doubt is coming from. Does it come from red flags or deep intuition?

There is a difference between a relationship that has potential versus a relationship that has the key ingredients to go the difference. Love isn’t always enough for a relationship to go the distance and to be healthy. However, love plus a commitment to do the work independently and together can be the game-changer in a relationship.

Making loving requests is a great way to not build resentment in relationships. Requests from a loving place are much different than demands from a defensive or pissed-off place. People who come from a defensive or pissed-off place have difficulty getting their needs met.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

When you hear your partner give feedback about you, can you hear it or do you get triggered immediately?
Are you playing out little boy or girl behavior in your relationship that is a turn-off for your partner? Are you respecting and tending to the little boy or girl inside your partner?
Are you willing to go the distance in your partnership by doing the work? Is your partner willing? Are you willing to be in a relationship where your partner isn’t doing the work?
Can you make powerful, loving requests of your partner to get your needs met?

Rory & Tyler’s Question:

After their separate coaching sessions, Rory & Tyler come together to work through their issues and discuss ways to move their relationship forward.

Rory & Tyler’s Key Insights and Ahas:

Tyler wants to hold space for Rory to really see her.
Rory wants to be her whole self and allow Tyler to be his whole self in the relationship.
They both would like unclouded, infinite, real love.
Tyler would like words of confirmation from Rory.
Tyler finds it hard to release anger.
Tyler feels triggered when Rory acts a certain way.
Tyler needs to be inspired romantically.
Rory loves Tyler for his support.
Tyler loves Rory for her joviality.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

Tyler, do emotional release work.
Rory, explore her sensuality and sexuality.
Get specific with each other about what they want.
Work with a therapist together and separately.
Tyler, when he is triggered to remind himself that Rory is not his mother.
Use a simple codeword to help their partner recognize their triggers.
Rory, inspire Tyler romantically.

Sponsor:

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Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

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CC: What happens When We Die? with Nanci Danison 0

Sep 10, 2022

After Nanci died on March 14, 1994, she returned to Nanci's life from the most extensive afterlife experience survived and recorded in order to tell anyone who would listen about what happened to her in the afterlife and what she remembers learning there about life, death, and the afterlife. Her afterlife experience gave her knowledge of spiritual tools we souls inside humans can access and she shares that knowledge with us.

Her new book, Create a New Reality—Move Beyond Law of Attraction Theory, introduces you to the incredible spiritual power of manifesting that we souls possess, and leads you step-by-step through how to create more opportunities to better your life, to replace old beliefs that hold you back from creating a happier life, and to heal yourself of physical and emotional wounds.

Learn more at http://nancidanison.com/

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EP 365: She Said with Rory — Part 2 of a 3-part Couples Coaching Series 0

Sep 7, 2022

This episode is a couple’s coaching session with the female partner in the relationship. Today’s caller, Rory, finds herself at a crossroads after being in a three-year relationship with Tyler. She would like guidance on whether or not she can get her needs met in this relationship. During this session, Christine questions whether there are enough shared values for both of them to go the distance in a side-by-side partnership.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode365]

The length of a relationship does not determine its success. If a relationship doesn’t last, it is not a failure. Some of the most successful relationships have ended. Relationships are successful when you learn a lot or heal from them. Unfortunately, love isn’t enough in a relationship.

Physically, for men, attraction is very important. They like to feel attracted to their partner consistently over the long term. For a female to feel sexual and safe, she needs to feel like there is a commitment to consciousness, emotional vulnerability, and intimacy.

A couple needs shared values, vision, the right polarity, and an equal amount of willingness and commitment. A couple must want the same things in life to make a relationship work.

I’m happy to announce that my next Women’s Retreat will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat to get more information about this life-changing opportunity. There is still time to register!

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Are you in any kind of relationship, be it friendship, romantic, or work where you feel you are giving more than you are getting?
Did you grow up in a family where love was confused with validation? Did you only feel loved and seen when you accomplished something?
Are you a female who has been accused of being too much in your masculine energy?
Do you feel you have done a lot of work but your romantic partner isn’t doing their work? Do you think you will be willing and able to grow together as a couple?

Rory’s Question:

Rory is at a crossroads with her partner and trying to figure out if the relationship has run its course.

Rory’s Key Insights and Ahas:

She believes she operates in the masculine and her partner in the feminine.
She believes things need structure and that a relationship needs work.
She feels she does more than she receives.
As a child, she only felt love when she accomplished something.
Her relationship feels safe to her.
She doesn’t feel taken care of in the relationship.
She knows, logically, that Tyler loves her but her emotional needs aren’t being met.
She has been a victim of sexual assault.
She feels less than when she is being herself.
She feels she is not supported when she makes decisions.
They took a short break from the relationship.
She would like Tyler to dive deep into the work needed in their relationship.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

Look into the protective patterns that show up in her relationship.
Be completely herself in the relationship.
Ask for what she needs in a vulnerable way.

Sponsor:

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Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

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CC: Getting Pregnant Naturally in My 40s 0

Sep 3, 2022

In this episode I share my fertility and pregnancy journey. My intention is to share information that may be helpful and inspiring. I've received a lot of questions about getting pregnant in my 40s and I've been hesitant to share since fertility is such a tender topic and I have deep compassion for anyone going through fertility or pregnancy challenges. Please know you are not doing anything wrong and there is nothing wrong with you. I hope this episode is helpful.

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EP 364: He Said with Tyler — Part 1 of a 3-part Couples Coaching Series 0

Aug 31, 2022

This episode is a couple’s coaching session with the male partner in the relationship. Today’s caller, Tyler, is in a relationship with an amazing woman. He says they are at a crossroads and would like guidance on whether or not to make her his life partner or if they are better served to let each other go. Christine uncovers a childhood wound that may be keeping him from experiencing true intimacy with his partner.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode364]

In a relationship, over time the attraction changes. It becomes more about intimacy and about exploring sexuality together. The initial infatuation attraction is easy. That is the low-hanging fruit attraction. Next-level relationships take intimacy, sexuality, and affection to another level. In a relationship, it is about exploring and going deeper with each other and not relying on the quick high.

The beginning of a relationship is almost always the easiest. We have hormones attracting us to each other and things are new and shiny. It is when we go deeper that intimacy blocks reveal themselves.

Remember, more often than not, things that come up in our relationships stem from things that we did not get in our childhood.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Are you someone who loves romance, and the infatuation period in a relationship but after it wears off you find it gets hard?
Do you feel that your needs are not being met or do you have a hard time communicating your needs?
Do you have a mother or father wound and you think it may be impacting how you are showing up in a relationship?
Are you questioning whether the relationship you are in is the one you should be in or whether it has an expiration date and it is time for you to move forward?

Tyler’s Question:

Tyler is in a relationship and is looking for guidance on how to make strides toward making her a life partner or if they are better served to let each other go.

Tyler’s Key Insights and Ahas:

His partner has some core traits he wants in a partner.
He feels they are at a crossroads with some important decisions to make.
Emotionally, he may be half-in and half-out.
He is an overthinker.
He may push her away because he senses her masculinity.
His partner reminds him of his mother.
They have been together for three years.
He feels guilty about not showing up as the man he is capable of being.
He doesn’t lead the relationship the way he feels he should.
He is still trying to decide how to show up in the relationship.
He loves his partner, Rory.
He attracts “masculine” women.
He has a mother wound because he feels resentful for feeling as if he was her caregiver in his childhood.
A part of him may not know how to have intimacy with a woman.
He fears being let down by a woman.
He is tired of it being so hard to feel loved, desired, and cared for.
He is craving deep intimacy with a woman.
He wants to be more expressive in a relationship.
He feels he needs to initiate sexual relations within the relationship.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

Do emotional release work and grieve the relationship he never had with his mother, at ChristineHassler.com/angerrelease.
Don’t make a relationship decision right now.
Be open and appreciate how his partner desires him.
Find passion and purpose in other areas of his life besides romance.
Practice intimacy with his partner.

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Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

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CC: Reair: EP 59: How to Feel More Connected Spiritually and Have Faith with Toni 0

Aug 27, 2022

The human experience is a beautiful thing, even when it’s challenging. It is sacred when someone is vulnerable. Today’s caller, Toni, shares her vulnerability as she asks for guidance. She reveals that many of the decisions of her life come from a place of fear. Toni is confused about what security and love really are.

We talk about having a relationship with a higher power especially after she has gone through times in her life when she didn’t feel there was any kind of God. There IS some kind of higher power. There are so many names for it, so many ways people interpret it, but to me, it is infinite unconditional love. It may be hard to believe in any kind of God, when there is so much suffering in the world.

The best way I can attempt to understand all the horrible things that happen, is that they happen as a result of human choice and free will. While many human choices are still made from a place of pain and fear, we are in a time of awakening. We are in a massive shift in consciousness. What is available to us all, is to make the choice to see the world through spiritual eyes. See ourselves through more spiritual eyes, without judgment; to see through the eyes of infinite and unconditional love. To heal our own pain that is preventing us from feeling connected to a higher power.

We are moving into more acceptance, forgiveness and gratitude. If you are craving a deeper spiritual connection, please don’t wait for God to prove itself to you -- instead, open your heart, and pray to be shown the way. You are a spiritual being having a human experience. You are one. You are love. You are connected.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

● Do you feel you are operating more out of fear than faith?

● Are you making a lot of decisions with fear or self-doubt?

● Are you a people pleaser, who is afraid of disappointing people?

● Is connecting to a higher power challenging to you? If you do have a connection, would you like to deepen it?

● Are there situations in your life that make you doubt whether a God exists?

Toni's Question: Toni feels all aspects of her life are affected by her making decisions from a place of fear. She would like to find a way to think more productively.

Toni's Key Insights and Aha’s:

● She fears failing and disappointing people.

● Her self-worth is based on her people pleasing.

● She’s confused about what security and love really are.

● She hasn’t felt protected, or connected to her spirituality, since her father passed.

● She feels like she would be clearer, if she had a spiritual connection.

● She has been operating in survival mode.

● She should know she is not broken.

● She can change her relationship with herself, today.

● She can focus on her blessings, not on her fears.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

● She should realize she can access her spirituality.

● She should start processing her pain, and remove judgment, to arrive at forgiveness and love.

● She should put herself in an environment where she can heal.

● She can start cultivating her relationship with God, by talking to him/her.

Assignments and Takeaways:

● What is in your way of a connection to a higher power?

● What is keeping you in patterns of people pleasing and indecision?

● Do you have old trauma that needs to be processed?

● What beliefs may be keeping you from having beliefs?

● What religious upbringing did you have, which no longer resonates with you?

● You need to find which truth resonates with you.

● Look for a spiritual community of people who are committed to awakening, and who know we are all connected to source. ● Start to develop a relationship with your higher power.

● Pray. Pray for experiences, feelings, and pray to be shown the way.

Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Christine Hassler Free E-book

Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler

@christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Over It and On With It Initial Podcast

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EP 363: Breaking Up a Friendship with Josie 0

Aug 24, 2022

This episode is about speaking our needs in relationships and clearing out relationships that no longer serve us. Today’s caller, Josie, recently broke up with a long-term friend. She is feeling guilt around her decision. Christine reveals how friendships can be a beautiful teacher for us. We attract and draw in people in all different capacities and often friends that trigger us and reveal our issues. Yet, some friendships have expiration dates just like romantic relationships.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode363]

We don’t always think of friendships as a way to learn about our unresolved issues, particularly with our parents. Yet, we are always seeking to evolve and grow. Our subconscious is always at work trying to meet our needs. When we have unmet needs we look to people who seem familiar to the people who didn’t meet our needs in the first place.

If you have a friendship that is not working and draining you and you keep trying but it feels overwhelming, it is okay to end the friendship. It is better to end it and have a clearing and completion conversation than to make excuses and dread the person’s phone call or see them when you just don’t want to be their friend.

It takes up a lot of energetic space and it is not kind to the other person to pretend to be their friend. Complete any friendships that are not serving you or that you have grown out of. It is OK to move on.

I’m happy to announce that my next Women’s Retreat will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat or listen to my Coaches Corner with Jill to get more information about this life-changing opportunity. The early-bird registration promo ends on Sept. 1, 2022.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Did you recently have a breakup with a friend or are you in a friendship that may need a breakup?
Do you have a friendship where you feel you can’t fully be yourself or maybe the friendship feels one-sided?
Have you ever thought the friends you attract are based on childhood issues?
Do you feel you audition in relationships?

Josie’s Question:

Josie recently had a breakup with a life-long friend and she is doubting her decision.

Josie’s Key Insights and Ahas:

She recently broke up with her life-long friend.
She feels guilty about her decision to break up.
But she feels a sense of relief.
She let others drive relationships.
She feels she auditions in her relationships.
She feels she needs to put her needs aside to be noticed.
She feels nervous telling others how she feels.
She fears abandonment in her current relationship.
She feels that if she is her true self she will lose her boyfriend.
In many ways, she parented her father.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

Do work around her father wound.
Speak her needs in relationships.
Let go of any relationships that no longer serve her.

Takeaways:

Move on from friendships that you have grown out of or that no longer serve you.

Sponsor:

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Download this Episode

CC: Reair: EP 63: How to Beat Fear and Self-Sabotage with Jake 0

Aug 20, 2022

Collectively we are all going through a rebalancing of masculine and feminine energies, not only in what it means to be a man or a woman, but what it means to be human. We are just moving into rebalancing this energy so masculine and feminine energies can be in flow together. While women struggle to find their place in the masculine energy, men struggle to fit into more feminine things, such as being vulnerable or pursuing more creative endeavors that may feel less manly. This is not a time to be discouraged. We are all longing for belonging and connection.

This episode is about questioning the old paradigms and rules. Today’s caller, Jake, thinks he is stuck, but from my point of view he is at a crossroads. Will he continue to let old programming and belief systems drive him, or will he make a commitment to move past the fear of old paradigms, and step into his full potential?

During the call, I didn’t want to take Jake down the road of investigating his past, because he had already spent too much time analyzing the past and worrying about the future. Jake said he had an easy-going upbringing without a lot of drama or trauma.

Often, feeling that degree of comfort as a child makes it harder to take risks as an adult, because we don’t have enough experiential evidence to recover from failure, risks, and things that scare us. We have to stop asking ourselves why, why, why. We don’t have to self-analyze ourselves to death. We need to be aware of the patterns and self-limiting beliefs, so we can shift them. We all need to step up into our full potential, and not allow outdated paradigms hold us back. Men, it is ok to be vulnerable, to talk about your doubts, and to admit to confusion about who you are, and how to find your purpose.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

● Are you a man, or with a man, who is questioning his career path or purpose?

● Is fear something that is stopping you?

● Do you relate to sabotaging yourself?

Jake 's Question: Jake feels drawn toward another career change. He wants to know how to get out of his own head to move forward.

Jake 's Key Insights and Aha’s:

● He is sabotaging himself.

● He has competing intentions.

● He has a propensity to not follow through.

● He battles with fear and low self-worth.

● He has time management issues.

● He has created motion toward what he wants by putting himself out there.

● He is afraid he won’t live up to his full potential.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

● He should invest in a coach.

● He should read The Way of the Superior Man, by David Deida, and other personal development books.

● He should work on shifting his belief system and get clear about what his vision is.

● Over the next 40 days, he should do 10 things that get him out of his comfort zone.

● He should make a schedule for himself and stick to it.

Assignments and Takeaways:

● Go out and engage in behavior which pulls you out of your comfort zone, to develop trust in yourself.

● Commit to rewiring your brain. Visit NeuroGym to learn more.

● Stop obsessing about what you think is a liability.

● Show up fully for yourself, be your own word. Make commitments and don’t break them. If you do break them, re-negotiate and start again.

Resources: Christine Hassler - Book a session to be on the show! Christine Hassler Podcasts Christine Hassler Free E-book Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com NeuroGym

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EP 362: Is This Person Really the Love of Your Life, or is it an Issue-Based Relationship? With Rachel 0

Aug 17, 2022

This episode is about getting the love we deserve. Today’s caller, Rachel, is in an issue-based relationship with a partner who doesn’t make her a priority. An issue-based relationship is when unresolved issues bring two people together. These relationships tend to be stressful, on-again-off-again, and come with anxiety, but the physical attraction is often very strong. Whether or not you are in a relationship you will get some gems from this episode.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode362]

Do you want the love of your life to be someone who causes you anxiety, who doesn’t make compromises for you, or who doesn’t make you a priority? Don’t you want better? We all deserve better than that. The problem is we get the love we think we deserve, not the love we actually deserve.

Many of us find ourselves in a position where we know something isn’t good for us. We know we want, and deserve better, but we just can’t let it go. It’s a form of addiction. It’s codependency. It is having our unmet needs tickled just enough that we go back for more. But, it’s not love. It’s not a true connection or partnership.

Something that can trip us up and make us suffer way more than we need to is when we have a rose-colored glasses tint on the way we see things. Because, when we do, we are more in love with an ideal than we are with the reality of things.

When we experience a love that is not based on unresolved issues, it makes us glad we left the relationships that were based on our issues. Love that comes from a healthy place is amazing!

If someone isn’t going out of their way to make you a priority, it is a red flag.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Are you with someone you call the love of your life but they are more of a teacher or trigger in your life?
Are you aware your unresolved childhood issues and unmet needs could be influencing your relationship choices or the people you are attracted to?
Are you good at speaking up for your needs in relationships? Do you feel you always fight to get your needs met but it never happens?
Do you know you are in a relationship that isn’t good for you but you can’t seem to get out of it?

Rachel’s Question:

Rachel has an on-again-off-again relationship with someone she considers the love of her life and would like guidance on.

Rachel’s Key Insights and Ahas:

She looks outside of herself to find fulfillment.
She believes her partner is the love of her life.
Her partner doesn’t meet her needs.
She and her partner have great chemistry.
Her partner reminds her of her father.
She lost her family and fears losing her partner.
Her partner says he can’t handle her emotions.
She is in an intense issue-based relationship.
There are a lot of highs and lows in the relationship.
Her threshold for love is based on her relationship with her father.
She feels she is missing out on having a good life.
She feels anxious and exhausted.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

Let the relationship go to break her pattern.
Grieve the relationship with her partner and her father wound.
Work with a coach and get an accountability partner and ask for what she needs.
Pull her inner mother forward.
Remind herself that this is her inner child is trying to heal her father wound.
Be compassionate with herself while she finds authentic self-love.
Go to the ocean and perform an emotional release ritual.
Refrain from calling her current partner the love of her life.

Takeaways:

Awareness is not enough. Start making the changes necessary to transform.

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Download this Episode

CC: Reair: Internal Family Systems with Dr Richard Schwartz 0

Aug 13, 2022

You are going to learn so much from this episode!! And get to listen to a live demo of Dr Schwartz doing parts work with me. Richard Schwartz began his career as a family therapist and an academic at the University of Illinois at Chicago. There he discovered that family therapy alone did not achieve full symptom relief and in asking patients why, he learned that they were plagued by what they called “parts.” From these explorations with parts work, the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model was born in the early 1980s.

IFS is now evidence-based and has become a widely-used form of psychotherapy, particularly with trauma. It provides a non-pathologizing, optimistic, and empowering perspective and a practical and effective set of techniques for working with individuals, couples, families, and more recently, corporations and classrooms.

In 2013 Schwartz left the Chicago area and now lives in Brookline, MA where he is on the faculty of the Department of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School.

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EP 361: Letting Go of Grief and Confusion with Amy 0

Aug 10, 2022

This episode is about releasing grief and confusion and allowing ourselves the time and space to heal. Today’s caller, Amy, is 25-plus years past when she decided to have an abortion and is triggered by everything going on with Roe vs. Wade. We talk about it as an example of how grief never really goes away. She would like guidance about how to move past her shame, guilt, and lingering grief. If you are someone who has chosen to have an abortion or had to, I hope you find comfort in this episode.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode361]

Sometimes we have to slow down to speed up as we may be triggering our trauma with too much personal development work. Too much good work can trigger trauma and we may be doing too much of a good thing. When we grow up in chaos, our nervous systems become overloaded and personal development work can trigger it.

Trauma is too much, too soon, too fast. When we work on ourselves too much it can trigger our trauma bell. Even though personal development is good, to our nervous system it feels like an overload and too much to process.

One of the biggest tips for healing trauma is when we are in any kind of overload, we take a pause and ask ourselves what we need at the moment. It can take practice. The better we get at it the more we start to be able to get out of the trigger. When we are conditioned at operating with a hyper-aroused nervous system, pausing and pacing ourselves is the key to healing.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Did you have an abortion at some point in your life and still carry around guilt and shame but are ready to let it go?
Do you judge other women who have made a similar choice? Are you willing to let go of the judgment?
Do you suffer from confusion and lack of clarity?
Could you be doing too much personal development work? Is it working against you?

Amy’s Question:

Amy would like some deep healing for her 16-year-old inner child who made a decision that she continues to guilt and shame herself for.

Amy’s Key Insights and Ahas:

She completed the Inner Child Workshops 1 and 2.
She had an abortion at 16.
The recent Roe vs. Wade conversations trigger her.
She was brought up in the Catholic religion.
She wants to heal her inner child.
The father of the child didn’t take responsibility.
She feels as if she sinned and that God will punish her.
She has never fully grieved her loss.
She feels she has released the soul of the baby back to the universe.
She has three children.
She would like clarity about her journey.
She is passionate about life and confidence coaching.
She feels unworthy of being a coach.
She has integrity.
She has beautiful things to offer people.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

Make a date to do the empty chair process with herself and the soul of the baby then invite her 16-year-old self into the joys of motherhood.
Take a pause when she feels overwhelmed or triggered.
Give herself some space and not feel as if she has to process everything at once.
Keep doing the work but not in a way that overwhelms her.

Takeaways:

Slow down to speed up. Are you triggering your trauma with too much personal development work? Do you need to slow down and give yourself some space?

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services