Info

Over It And On With It

Christine Hassler provides you with practical tools and spiritual principles to help you overcome whatever obstacles might be holding you back. Each episode, Christine coaches callers live on the air offering them inspiration and guidance to heal their past, change their present and create what they really want. Topics include: relationships, career, health, transitions, finances, life purpose, spirituality and whatever else callers have questions about. Christine coaches "regular people" on problems – and opportunities - we all face. It's a show that reminds you that you are not alone, while also teaching things you can implement in your own life.
RSS Feed Subscribe in Apple Podcasts
Over It And On With It
2021
February
January


2020
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2019
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2018
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2017
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2016
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2015
December
November
October


Categories

All Episodes
Archives
Categories
Now displaying: Category: general
Feb 4, 2016

If you want to achieve lasting success you should be concentrating on the who, what and why of your business and let the how naturally unfold with time. Pursuing your business goals without a clear understanding of what makes you uniquely qualified to provide a service (your secret sauce) to a client doesn’t serve anyone. It only wastes time and energy until you have a clear vision.

So often new light workers and entrepreneurs have a list of how they are going to fix things,  step 1 is this and step 2 is that, but coaching is not about fixing people. People embody all the inner resources they need to heal themselves. Coaching is about listening to them from a place of compassion and love. Becoming your own best client and focusing on what you are giving to others is your purpose.  

Becoming an entrepreneur is not an easy task. Fear and uncertainty may be causing you to stall and create blocks when you really just need to start sharing your gift with the world. Your gift holds great value. It is your business to know your value and quit working for free.

Today’s caller, Robby wants to start his coaching business but his vision isn’t clear. He is putting off getting clients until certain things are in place. Fear and uncertainty are suppressing his own inner guidance and creating blocks. We work to uncover his secret sauce and his why.

A good follow up to this episode is my next Coaches Corner - Standing in your Value.

For all of you Mission Driven Entrepreneurs out there - I am an affiliate and a supporter of Marie Forleo’s B-School. B-School is an 8-week video course which teaches smart, effective online marketing strategies. If you sign up for the program through my personal link, CH B-School,  I will gift you

  • Four 90 minute live group coaching calls for business and personal aspects
  • Access to a private Facebook group
  • Four custom meditations and visualizations
  • Access to my online programs and courses

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • What are you creating in your own life?
  • Are you clear about how you are uniquely qualified to do what you do?
  • What is the vision which pulls you toward what you are creating?
  • Does your ego hold you back every time you try to start?
  • Do you have a calling but are waiting for something to start?
  • Do you know which fears and beliefs may be holding you back?
  • Do you believe it’s your job to fix people, help people and care for people?

 

Robby ’s Question:

Robby is starting a coaching business. He believes becoming a coach will require him to be more extroverted. He is experiencing fear and uncertainty of moving forward and has created stalling techniques for himself.

 

Robby ’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • He is creating stalling techniques
  • He hasn’t taken action
  • He wants to get it right, he wants to be perfect
  • He is a good listener
  • He desires personal growth

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • He should ask his intuition what is in the way
  • Bring the focus off of himself and make it about his clients
  • He should drop his high expectations and live his authenticity
  • Understand he is creating value for people
  • He needs to be his best client and keep working in himself

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Dive into your Secret Sauce by identifying the 3 qualities which describe you the most.
  • Get clear on your vision. What is your why?
  • Visualize yourself serving your clients
  • Be your own best client/customer

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler B-School  

Secret Sauce Mastermind

@christinhassler

christine@christinehassler.com

The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks

Jan 30, 2016

My hunch is you are carrying around something that is very heavy and causes you unnecessary suffering.  This thing blocks you from the experiences and connections you desire. It weighs you down, holds you back and robs you of joy. What is this dreadful thing I am talking about? It is your story. And in this episode of Coaches Corner I give you tips on how to let it go!

Jan 27, 2016

If you were to write out your autobiography with the early chapters being on your past and the middle chapters representing the present, what would you change about your current story to get the ending (your future) to turn out just the way you want it to? Would you allow bitterness to leak into your later chapters or would you embrace forgiveness of yourself and those who may have hurt you?

It’s never too late to drop old belief systems and ‘un-program’ yourself. It’s never too late to change. Living as a victim means you do not want to take full responsibility for your life. Becoming the most authentic version of yourself will happen when you move through the process of forgiveness. It will set you free and allow you to live fully in the present.

Today’s caller, Miranda, needed her story to be heard free of judgment and from a place of compassion. She believed she needed to behave a certain way in order to receive love. Her compensatory strategy of being a caretaker, a rescuer, and a people pleaser was attracting toxic people into her life and not bringing her the love she desired.

People in your past can no longer be an excuse for why you don’t have what you want in your present.

If you enjoy this podcast please share on social media and leave a rating or review on iTunes.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • What are you still holding on to from your past that is impacting your present and creating your future?
  • How does Miranda’s story mirror your own?
  • When it comes to getting romantic love, what do you have to do or need to be in order to get it?
  • Is there someone you need to forgive?

 

Miranda’s Question:

Miranda is having trouble letting go of the past and finding forgiveness. She feels she has alienated everyone important in her life with her bitterness. 

 

Miranda’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She should acknowledge her blessings
  • She is attracting toxic people because it’s the only type of love she knows
  • She has made massive judgments about her own choices
  • She tries to get love by being a victim
  • She doesn’t know how to forgive

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • Update your own programming
  • She needs to forgive everyone in her life including herself
  • Find spiritual altitude
  • Start being nicer to herself
  • Work through the behavioral exercises in Expectation Hangover

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Identify your compensatory strategy and shift it
  • Understand the payoffs to the behaviors you don’t like
  • Who do you think you need to forgive?
  • Make a list of your gifts, of all the things you truly love about yourself and make that your new story
  • Know that your past does not need to dictate the present

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Expectation Hangover 

@christinhassler

christine@christinehassler.com

Jan 23, 2016

Do you ever feel anxious?  I suspect your answer is yes – you may even be experiencing it right now. You’re not alone. Here’s the good news: it is 100% possible to ease and actually eliminate anxiety or at the very least dramatically reduce it. I explain and give you lots of tips in this coaches corner.

Jan 20, 2016

The wonderful thing about pain and anxiety is that we have the power to free ourselves from it. Many of the overwhelming feelings we are having now are rooted somewhere in our past. Something devastating caused our young minds to create a program to follow, so we didn’t have to feel that way ever again.

As we grow, the ability to address our fears and overcome our ‘victim story’ becomes available to us. We are able to comfort our younger selves by self-parenting and through work that is healing. We also have the ability to acknowledge our need for protection, thank it for its service to us and move our energy to where we need it now. We can then replace our impulsive responses with our inner voice, which is guided by our intuition.

In between stimulus and response we have a choice and in that choice lies our freedom. – Viktor Frankl - Man’s search for meaning

Our caller, Nicole, is struggling to find her true intuition. She feels it may be lost to her or clouded over by her deep-seated anxiety. She has used her anxiety for many years to protect herself, but now realizes it is time to get over it and on with it so that she could enjoy a deeper life.

My next Retreat in July 2016 will fill up quickly, so if you want more information please contact Jill at jill@christinehassler.com

If you enjoy this podcast, please share on social media and leave a rating or review on iTunes.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you suffer from anxiety? Is there something you would like to be free of?
  • Whenever you try anything new, does it come with a lot of fear?
  • Do you prefer control over uncertainty?
  • Did something happen in your past that might still be impacting you, but you are not sure what to do about it?

 

Nicole’s Question:

Nicole has anxiety-driven panic attacks and lacks self-confidence. She longs to have a deeper life and become connected to the world.    

 

Nicole’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She uses her anxiety as a source of protection
  • She needs to feel she is in control of a situation
  • As a child, she felt vulnerable
  • Intuition will be clearer when anxiety subsides
  • She needs to respond rather than react
  • It’s OK for her to make mistakes

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • She should tell her younger self “things will be alright”
  • Say “I accept” & then “I am choosing to”
  • Interrupt the patterns of anxiety
  • Turn up the volume of her calm inner voice
  • Understand the difference between resignation and acceptance

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Think about the “big deals” or significant events in your life. What belief systems were formed then that might be impacting you today?
  • Tell yourself the things you needed to hear during your “big deals”
  • Understand that it was not your fault
  • How does your protective mechanism serve you? Give it a new job description

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Expectation Hangover 

@christinhassler

christine@christinehassler.com

jill@christinehassler.com to sign up for the Bali retreat

 

Jan 16, 2016

Do you find that you have taken on the expectation that you are supposed to be happy all the time? Sure, eternal happiness sounds awesome, yet this expectation that we “should” be able to be in a positive place all the time can be the very thing that eludes us from actually experiencing it. How? Well, when we pressure or force ourselves to be a certain way, which involves avoiding the reality of our current feelings, we engage in what is called “spiritual bypass.” Spiritual bypass is a process of attempting to high-vibe yourself out of what you perceive as a negative feeling instead of allowing yourself to feel it and heal it. Don’t get me wrong – joy, love and peace are our essence, but if you haven’t noticed we are all still human and have moments of where that is not exactly our experience. In this Coaches Corner I encourage you to accept the contrast of your human experience and offer tips for how to move through those not-so-happy moments.

Jan 13, 2016

Advertisements, movies and even fairy tales will tell you a product, money or a prince are all you need to live happily ever after. Sorry, that is not true. External things are not the key to a happy life.

Because happiness is an inside job, we are all capable of self-generating the feeling of happiness. If we move to acceptance , we will recognize that the source of our own happiness comes from within.

We ARE capable of living our lives contently. But first, we must examine what we are devoted to and look into the places in our lives where being grateful of what we already have can elevate us to acceptance. It is normal for humans to lead lives full of ebbs and flows.

Our caller, Jennifer, is putting pressure on herself to figure out her entire life even though she is only 24 years old. She has an expectation hangover about not being where she thinks she should be in her career. She is waiting for something external to bring her happiness and to spark her passion.

People with high expectations tend to not feel happy more often. Listen to this week’s Coaches Corner – Is it possible to be happy all the time? – for an in-depth look at the secret sauce to overcoming an expectation hangover.

My Bali Retreat, in September 2016, will fill up quickly so if you want more information please contact Jill at jill@christinehassler.com

If you enjoy this podcast please share it on social media and leave a rating or review on iTunes.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Which “if then” and “if when” equations have you set up to define your own happiness?
  • Do you think you should be further along in your life?
  • Do you think it’s too late to be happy?
  • Are you feeling depressed in your life and expecting something to come and save you?

Jennifer’s Question:

Jennifer feels stuck. She tries new things but gives up on them easily. She wants to know when the spark will come to keep her from feeling lost and unhappy.

Jennifer’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She pretends she can find happiness outside herself
  • Surrounding herself with people she loves brings her happiness
  • She wants things to come to her without working for them
  • She hasn’t taken action to keep herself from being disappointed
  • She is not supposed to figure out her entire life by 25

How to get over it and on with it:

  • Realize happiness is a moment, not a permanent state
  • Have low attachment and high involvement
  • She can create the feeling of happiness anytime she wants
  • Accept herself, quirks and all
  • Take a comedy or an improv class
  • Make two people at work smile every day

Tools and Takeaways:

  • What will it take for you to fully accept your life as it is right now?
  • Stop trying to do things. Either do something or don’t. There is no in between.
  • Do what you need to do to de-blah yourself and get your mojo back on.
  • Create happiness on the inside by starting with gratitude
  • Be a happiness ambassador
  • Physically connect with people

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Expectation Hangover 

@christinhassler

christine@christinehassler.com

jill@christinehassler.com to sign up for the Bali retreat

Jan 9, 2016

The New Year comes with the tradition of making resolutions, which are usually promises to do something “more, better, or different.” We vow to exercise more, get a better job, meditate regularly, fall in love, or find a different way to handle our stress. But does this really do us any good? Most of us start the New Year with the greatest of intentions, yet by March (or even by the second week in January) we may not find ourselves so resolved. We revert back to old patterns and beat ourselves up for not sticking to our resolutions. Could there be a way to ring in the year that serves us better? YES! And it has been my New Year ritual for the past ten years which I share in todays’ Coaching Corner.  NOTE: you can do this process ANYTIME during the year because it is always a good time to consciously let go of what is not serving you so then you can intentionally co-create your dreams and desires.

Jan 6, 2016

Our physical body ages naturally with time, but our emotional development is much more complex. Our minds have the ability to leave situations unfinished – anticipating that a resolution will appear eventually. When this happens, we get stuck by reliving our hurts and challenges over and over again until we are mentally ready to deal with these emotions. 

Becoming comfortable with our own vulnerability is how we heal this unfinished business. We can start by reassuring ourselves that it’s okay, it’s over, and it’s safe now. It’s okay to stop creating distractions that only serve to move us farther and farther away from the healing of our core wounds. Healing starts with self-love and it always comes back to our relationship with our self.

Today’s caller, Jenna, believes she is struggling with consistency issues.  She quickly realizes that she may be manifesting physical health problems; and living the life of an overachiever to gain the attention and love she didn’t receive as a teenager. 

Jenna is asking for help, which is a clear sign she is ready to get over it and on with it. A relationship that is free of judgement and filled with compassion, like the relationship with a coach, will help her to continue on her personal development journey and reinforce the relationship she needs to build with her younger self. 

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • When it comes to dealing with challenging issues, do you analyze the issues to try to figure them out rather than feeling and processing these things fully? How do you handle your emotions?
  • If you spoke with your friends in the same way you speak to yourself would you have any friends?
  • Do you get frustrated with your personal growth? When you make progress do you tend to backtrack, creating an endless loop? 

 

Jenna’s Question:

Jenna is struggling to get to the root of her consistency issues regarding her health and wellness and wants to know how to stay on track.

 

Jenna’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She didn’t feel safe or secure in her youth
  • Her health has become a distraction
  • She doesn’t have to manifest health issues to get love and attention
  • It’s easier to act outwardly than to reflect inwardly

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • Jenna should encourage her younger self 
  • She should take care of her emotional body as well as her physical body
  • She should parent herself in the way she wanted to be parented
  • Look in the mirror with one hand on her heart and the other on her stomach and say something kind to herself
  • Have a vulnerability conversation with her counselor

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Listen to Episode 16, Why our parents trigger us (no matter what our age) , on Parenting
  • Identify the distractions and coping strategies you adopt to keep yourself from feeling emotions or pain
  • Develop a relationship with your younger self by writing a letter to reassure him or her that it is over
  • Start each day connecting with yourself in the mirror and saying encouraging things
  • Practice vulnerability with people in your life
  • Continue in your personal development and if you aren’t growing you may need to make some changes

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Expectation Hangover 

Brene Brown

The Gifts of Imperfection

Daring Greatly

@christinhassler

christine@christinehassler.com

 

Dec 31, 2015

Happy New Year! This is a guided visualization and meditation that will support you in completing this year and consciously creating the next. In this twelve minute journey, I guide you through identifying the lessons and blessings from the last year so that you can clearly envision and begin creating what you’d like to experience in the coming year. This is especially great to listen to around the New Year but you can listen to it anytime of year to complete your past, focus on your present and create your future. Set some time aside to gift yourself with this process. Sending you love for a prosperous and joyful New Year.

Dec 30, 2015

This episode is about getting over what you didn’t get from a parent (or parents).

There is no manual for living. Sometimes we just need to ask for help from our spiritual guide and then direct all of our energy towards the life we truly desire. There will be times when we get frustrated and angry with ourselves and other people. It’s OK, it happens. We are all human, right?

Well, even our parents are human. Many of us have trouble accepting our parents as individuals outside of the role they play in our lives. We put our own expectations on them to try to fill the safety and security voids we perceived when we were separated from God during birth.

We often long for a love our parents are unable to give us. We need to recognize that just because they are older, it doesn’t mean their ability to love has changed. They love us in the best way they know how.

Today’s caller, Samantha uses self-criticism to protect herself from her pain. She is accustomed to holding herself to higher standards because she coaches others through their life journeys.  She is still holding on to her childhood anger over not feeling loved and acknowledged by her father. 

We work through her responsibility to re-parent herself, free herself through a spiritual practice and look at her father with compassionate eyes. 

If you are a woman who is having difficulty processing your anger, read the Emotional section of my book, Expectation Hangover. Try the temper tantrum technique, it may sound silly, but it really works.

Time slots have opened up for coaching sessions in January. If you are interested in a one-on-one session with me, sign up here Coaching with Christine.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you feel you are aware of your past and relationship with your parents, but that nothing is changing in your present?
  • Are you a self-help coach and hold yourself to a higher standard, believing you should know better?
  • Are you still longing for something you didn’t get from your parents? Do you experience an Expectation Hangover because your parents haven’t changed like you had hoped?
  • Are you irritable and short tempered with others, but know that isn’t who you are in your heart? 

 

Samantha’s Question:

Samantha wants to know how to stop being hard on other people. She finds herself feeling and doing things she doesn’t feel comfortable with, but she doesn’t understand why.

 

Samantha’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She feels she needs to protect herself
  • She is angry and may be bypassing her spirit
  • She’s projecting expectations on her Father that he cannot live up to
  • The same pattern keeps showing up in her life
  • She is worthy of her father’s love

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • Sam should give herself permission to be who she is
  • She can realize coaching people isn’t about saving them
  • She shouldn’t be lazy when it comes to her spiritual practice
  • She should put her energy into the direction she wants to head towards

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • What are you still hoping for from your parent?
  • How can you see your parents through compassionate eyes? What is their human story?
  • Write a letter to your parents letting them off the hook. Don’t send it, but use it as a way to let the issue go. 
  • What are ways you can parent yourself to give yourself what you need?
  • Start your spiritual practice now. Ask for help and it will come.

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Expectation Hangover 

Liberate yourself at my Winter Retreat January 8-10th

@christinhassler

 

Dec 23, 2015

True freedom is fulfilling and it is not about getting whatever you want. Freedom is about being fully and authentically self-expressed. Often our identities are created based on how others define us and not who we truly are. We may become imprisoned by other people’s opinions.

When we have been suppressed or restricted, we do not feel free and may rebel with self-sabotaging behavior. This may lead to reactive and unnecessary risks that do not serve us.  Some risks, however, are intuitive and proactive. These types of risk can lead us to necessary growth.

Today’s caller, Jessica, doesn’t understand why she isn’t doing the things she should be doing. She relies on other people’s expectations and judgments and doesn’t feel worthy or deserving of her dreams.

She is dealing with issues of her own self-worth while trying to live up to society’s outcome addicted focus.

When we realize it is all about truth and love, we bring ourselves into alignment with our core values. It is then we can appreciate that our raw, authentic self is absolutely perfect.

* Can you list the top 5 core values that are the compass for your life? You should be clear about what they are. If you need help, the process to find them is detailed in my book, Expectation Hangover.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Are you engaging in any rebellious or sabotaging behavior?
  • Do you start to freak out when you get what you want?
  • Do you feel free or suppressed and constricted?
  • Have you taken risks in life or do you play it safe?
  • Do you know what you should be doing, but take actions contrary to your goal?

Jessica’s Question:

Jessica wants to know why she makes the “wrong” decisions when she knows what the right decision should be, and why she sabotages herself while trying to attain her goals.

Jessica’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She has a war going on in her brain
  • She grew up with very strict rules
  • She doesn’t take risks
  • She doesn’t feel free
  • She always did the right thing even if she didn’t want to
  • She has difficulty breaking away from her ex-husband’s criticism
  • She wants to set a good example for her son

How to get over it and on with it:

  • Find a way for your inner rebel to be satiated
  • Give yourself permission to go after what you want
  • Acknowledge who you are apart from what you’ve been told
  • Stop carrying around old stories
  • Honor your heartfelt desires

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Write about your inner rebel
    • Describe your inner rebel
    • How does it act?
    • What behaviors does it engage in?
  • Write your definition of freedom
  • Write down ways you may be restricting yourself
  • Write down ways you could be authentically self-expressed
  • What is one tangible action step you can take toward being more authentically self-expressed?

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Expectation Hangover 

The Big Leap

@christinhassler

Dec 21, 2015

Happy Holidays!! This is a beautiful and sweet time of year, which can bring forward so many feelings and experiences. Some of you may be absolutely blissful – you love this season and are in a place of peace. Others of you may be really struggling this time of year.  Perhaps you feel alone. Or family dynamics are challenging. And some may be feeling a mix of both. You have moments of peace and joy and other moments of loneliness, anxiety or even sadness. Wherever you are is okay.  Please remove the expectation that your holidays are supposed to be any certain way – otherwise you will just keep waking up with an expectation hangover! My intention in sharing this meditation with you today is to remind you about what is most important not only this time of year but in every moment of every day, which is LOVE.

Dec 19, 2015

Regret. We’ve all felt it at some point. Some of you are feeling it right now and you are suffering because of it. Something did or did not happen the way you wanted. You did or didn’t do something the way you wished you would have. And you want more than anything to be able to rewind time and get a do-over. You’ve replayed scenarios over and over in your head thinking of all the things you could have done or said. You’re trapped in a shoulda/coulda/woulda perspective and it’s a miserable place to be, isn’t it? As much as you are aware that regret is a miserable place to hang out in, you cannot seem to be free of it. But I have good news: liberation from regret is 100% possible!! And it is essential to your well-being that you commit to letting go of regret. In this Coaches Corner, I explain how.  Listen closely to this episode…or you’ll regret it! ;)

Dec 16, 2015

Seasons change and so do we. We all have expectations as to how our lives should be, what our family should think of us and how we will feel after making a big change.

 

When we cannot come to terms with the decisions we have made, we experience regret and consequently an Expectation Hangover. But regret is useless and we often beat ourselves up over nothing. We cannot move forward by living in regret.

 

What if instead of suffering from regret, we found peace and experienced connection by reprogramming our unconscious mind to fully accept the decisions we have made? What if instead of dwelling on the past, we fully opened ourselves to receiving all the gifts in the present?

 

In today’s call, Jenny is uncertain about her decision to move, in order to be closer to her family. She is having difficulty creating her new life, because she is stuck in her old one. She is also physically sick from the stress. She thinks geography may be a factor, but we discover she may need to stop pushing against the change and allow things to happen.

 

Taking a step back and seeing the impression her indecisiveness is leaving on her children, might be the key that helps Jenny to accept the decisions she has made and to move forward towards creating the story she wants to tell.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Is there a recent decision you made you currently regret?
  • Are you in a situation where you think that changing things is the answer to your problems?
  • Are you feeling physically drained and apathetic?
  • Are you an adventure junkie?
  • Are you a parent and feel it's important to make your child feel safe and secure?

 

Jenny’s Question:

Jenny is making herself physically sick and tired, because she regrets moving a long distance to be closer to her family and would like to know how to get over it and on with it.

 

Jenny’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She is living half in Wyoming and half in Wisconsin
  • Her fatigue is a signal from her body
  • Self-judgment is sucking her dry
  • She's stuttering on decisions

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • Fully accept the reasons for making previous decisions
  • Be fully present wherever you are
  • Begin a spiritual practice such as yoga and/or meditation
  • Create the feeling you are missing
  • Learn to live more inside out and less outside in
  • Embody safety and acceptance
  • Create a community where you are

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Write out a list of emotions you want to feel and generate them, reorient yourself from inside out
  • Write out these 3 things:

              ○   The reasons why it was the best decision you could have made, given the information you had

              ○   The reasons why you feel safe and secure

              ○   The reasons why you can trust yourself

  • Collect evidence about the story you want to tell
  • Inspect your health problem to see if it could be a lack of self-love; also check out "Choosing me before we” for in-depth analysis
  • Examine what you are teaching your children, they feel your energy

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Expectation Hangover 

@christinhassler

Coaching Corner - Getting Over Regret

Choosing ME Before WE - Christine Hassler

Dec 12, 2015

Courage. It’s a desirable quality to have and an empowering way to be. Our heroes and inspirational leaders are labeled courageous.  We are told throughout our life to “be courageous,” but that isn’t always easy. In fact, courage is often one of the most difficult qualities to truly integrate. Why is being courageous not as easy to embody as the heroes make it look in the movies?  There are two main reasons.  First, being courageous means being willing to face fear and embrace uncertainty.  YIKES! We don’t like being scared or not knowing what is ahead.  Second, most of us do not truly understand what courage really means.    In this coaches corner, Christine shares how to become more courageous and go after the things in life that scare us.

Dec 9, 2015

Absolute certainty is rare. If you are waiting to be absolutely certain before making a decision, you may find yourself spinning in confusion.

Today’s session is with Marie, who believes she is ready to make big changes in her life, but fear and unresolved issues from a recent break-up are keeping her from taking the first step. She is distracting herself by considering multiple changes at once and it’s depleting her energy. 

When we fear something we create roadblocks for ourselves. Roadblocks can be waiting for certainty, attempting to move forward before dealing with issues from the past and talking a lot about what we want, but not taking the first steps to get to it.

Marie realizes she may be lingering on open issues from a past relationship. She needs closure before she is able to move forward, but she’s unsure of how to get past the breakup. We work through how Marie can use her inner wisdom to remove the residue from the past and pursue her career dreams with a clear mind.

When we accept change and allow it to happen, we discover our challenges are leading us somewhere. 

Read the emotional and mental chapters of the treatment plan in my book, Expectation Hangover, to gain a deeper understanding on grieving and closure.

If you want to get unstuck join me on January 8th - 10th for my “for women only” Winter Retreat.  

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Are you waiting to do something until you are completely sure?

Are you attempting to make too many decisions at once and not making progress on any of them?

Are you a creative person who feels the need to do everything all at once?

Are you still wanting something from a previous relationship and are unable to move on until you get it?

 

Marie’s Question:

Marie feels she is in a rut and wants to make a big move, including getting over her last relationship. She is a motivated person but has a fear of moving forward.

 

Marie’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She wants to feel certain about something before she moves forward
  • She’s trying to do too many things at once
  • She’s making a reactive choice and not a proactive one 
  • She needs other people’s opinions
  • Listening to her intuition will help her move on

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • Clean up old residue first before moving forward
  • Focus on one thing at a time
  • Own the part you played in the relationship
  • Listen to your intuition

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Focus on the problem or the question you don’t want to deal with first 
  • A closure conversation or letter should include
    • ○ What you learned
    • ○ What you are grateful for
    • ○ What you forgive the other person for
    • ○ What you forgive yourself for
    • ○ Acknowledge the other person
    • ○ A thank you and a goodbye

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

@christinhassler

jill@christinehassler.com

2016 Winter Retreat

Expectation Hangover

 

Dec 5, 2015

Are you carrying around an unspoken question or assumption about something? Did someone do something or behave in a way that stumped (and possibly hurt) you but you haven’t had the guts to ask them about it? Are you being a wee bit wimpy when it comes to speaking your truth? I see so many people suffer under our own assumptions, pretend everything is fine, and take things personally rather than just having the chutzpha to be real, raw and vulnerable with another person. In today’s coaches corner I give you tips for mustering up the courage to take action and actually say what you need (and want) to say.

Dec 2, 2015

If you have ever dealt with the pain of rejection, this episode will help!  Perhaps you’ve heard, “Rejection is God’s Protection” but the process of rejection feels pretty awful until we learn what it is really about. Our caller today, Alex, has courageously opened up to another person and shared her truth with them. But the other person did not reciprocate her feelings. She asks me how she can get over her heartbreak and rejection and get on with her life. 

If you have ever felt the pain of rejection or find yourself in an avoidance trap, listen to the tips I give Alex at the end of our call. You can also find resources in my book, Expectation Hangover, to help heal yourself. 

We also talk about speaking our truth - which takes takes courage. We ponder on how our message will be received; but if we believe in our truth, there is value in getting it out into the world.  

When our truth needs to be told to another person and they don’t realize the outcome we are hoping for we often take it personally. We perceive their response as if something is wrong with us or we did something wrong.

Our fear of the possible rejection is an avoidance trap. An avoidance trap is spending our time and energy avoiding what we don’t want rather than working towards what we do want.

By understanding that we consistently attract experiences to help us heal our core wounds, we realize rejection doesn’t really exist. It is merely a projection of unowned, unseen qualities inside us.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

What are you construing perceived rejection to mean about you?

What was so attractive about the person or situation you feel didn’t choose you?

Is there someone you have feelings for but are too scared to tell them?

Has something upset you but you don’t have the guts to speak your truth?

 

Alex’s Question:

Alex wants to know how to best handle the heartbreak and rejection she is feeling after telling someone she loves them and finding out the feelings are not mutual.  

 

Alex’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She struggles with feeling as though she didn’t fit in while growing up
  • She feels she gave away her power
  • She is learning to read people
  • She realizes she is stronger than she thought she was
  • She doesn’t need to look outside herself for her worthiness

 

How to get over it and on with it:

  • Don’t look to others to find your own worth
  • Trust your desires and have faith
  • Be kind to yourself during this time

 

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Let go of anger and resentment - Empty out your “negative” emotions in a letter and then rip it up
  • Write a goodbye letter you don’t intend to mail that includes:
    • ○ I’m saying goodbye because …
    • ○ I learned from you …
    • ○ I thank you for …
    • ○ I forgive myself for …
    • ○ I forgive myself for ...
    • Say what you need to say - Speak to the person even if they are not there
    • Set boundaries with yourself and move on
    • Engage in activities that encourage self-acceptance
    • Do a positive projection exercise

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Expectation Hangover 

@christinhassler

 

Nov 26, 2015

I love the week of Thanksgiving here in the U.S. because gratitude is on everyone’s mind. Cultivating a consciousness of gratitude is a spiritual practice – it’s a MUST for anyone who is committed to living a life of love. Plus, when we are aware of what we do have, we are a lot less inclined to obsess about all the things we don’t (and have fewer expectation hangovers!). Enjoying this special Coaches Corner from me where the focus is on gratitude.

Nov 24, 2015

This special episode has two career coaching sessions, the first with Nick and the second with Lindsey. Both Nick and Lindsey are searching for a way to use their passions and to share their gifts with the world.

Nick’s session focuses on his spirituality and whether or not his current position allows him to elevate the consciousness of others with his law practice.

Lindsey’s session concentrates on her transitions and her indecisiveness around using her creativity to reach her end goal.

Lessons from both calls are that we don’t need to leave jobs that are not creative enough; we can be creative and passionate in our current situations. If we honor where we are now by embracing our passions and our spirituality, we will end up spreading light to others.

If you yearn to make more of an impact in your work life, drastic changes to satiate your desires are unnecessary and often cause additional discomfort.

Increasing our vibrations will make everything we do a more spiritual experience.


Coaching Session #1 - Nick

While Listening to this Call Consider/Ask Yourself:
Do you feel a calling to make an impact?
Are you in a job that does not seem spiritual enough and you feel inclined towards doing something different?
Do you feel like you are compromising and paying your dues now in order to gain financial security?
Are you actively spreading light where you are or are you waiting for better circumstances?

Nick’s Question:
Nick wants to integrate spirituality into his current life but doesn’t want to break his life to fix it.

Nick’s Key Insights and Aha’s:
● He may be a light worker in the subtle sense
● He doesn’t have to change what he’s doing to make a difference
● He could focus on being and interacting with people

How Nick can get over it and on with it:
● Honor his calling to spread light through his existing work
● Bring more consciousness into what he is doing
● Try deepening his vibration when communicating with others in his work
● Try the 25/5 rule of working for 25 minutes and taking 5 to do something you enjoy doing

Tools and Takeaways:
● Become dedicated to your spiritual practice in your work
● Consider bringing beauty into your work environment
● Ask God on a daily basis to use you and pay attention to opportunities that may arise from it
● Implement practices that reconnect you to your higher power

 

Coaching Session #2 - Lindsey

While Listening to this Call Consider/Ask Yourself:
● Do you feel apathetic or stuck in your current career?
● Are you craving more creativity and passion in your life?
● Do you put a lot of pressure on yourself to figure everything out at once?

Lindsey’s Question:
Lindsey is having a hard time figuring out if her job transition was the right thing to do and if she should continue investing in her passion, music.

Lindsey’s Key Insights and Aha’s:
● She loves helping children with crafts
● She needs more of the creative aspect in her job
● She should focus on the next steps and not the end goal

How Lindsey can get over it and on with it:
● Lindsey could listen to her intuition in order to be more creative
● She should honor this phase of her life
● Ask her higher power to show her the people and situations she can serve

Tools and Takeaways:
● Ask yourself what is the next step, not the end goal
● Honor where you are and allow your passions to unfold
● Don’t expect a job to make you feel creative or passionate

Resources:

Christine Hassler

@christinhassler

Nov 21, 2015

There seems to be a lot to worry in life that we cannot control everything. But worrying is a HUGE drain of your energy and completely useless so in this Coaches Corner, Christine offers you a way to stop worrying, or at the very least dramatically reduce it.   Worry gives us a false sense of control when we are uncertain about someone or something. When faced with the unknown, worrying is often the default habit we slip into as it gives us a way to seemingly deal with whatever our concern is. In today’s episode, Christine breaks down worry for you and teaches you a technique that you can start using today to transform from worrywart to dream manifestor!

Nov 18, 2015

Our caller today is Sha who is a millennial. Millennials are today’s 20 and early 30 somethings. Many millennials are unjustly thought to be narcissistic, entitled and said to have no work ethic.

Sha is experiencing residue from having many of her decisions made for her during her adolescence. And it’s not just Sha who is confronting these issues; many millennials feel the effects of over-parenting and the accompanying pressures that linger from missing out on important developmental stages.

Sha and I uncover her validation issues and examine her inability to stick to a routine. She becomes aware of her past programming and I offer her tools to assist her in reprogramming herself. One important tool is to understand that what she wants to hear from others is what she actually wants to hear from herself.

We also explore ways to relieve anxiety and self-trust issues through being in the present.

After the coaching session, I offer a special guided meditation; so go to a quiet place where you can close your eyes and get serene with me.

Consider/Ask Yourself:
Do you have trouble making decisions?
Do you consult multiple people before you make a choice?
Is it hard for you to stick with a routine or stay disciplined?
Do you have a hard time quieting your mind?

Sha’s Question:
Sha finds it hard to make decisions and is having trouble relaxing.

Sha’s Key Insights and Aha’s:
● She was peacocking all the time
● She wasn’t seeing herself
● She may have missed out on fundamental developmental stages
● She has difficulty with discipline and routines
● She doesn’t trust herself

How to get over it and on with it:
● Practice telling yourself “be here now”
● Repair yourself by giving yourself the developmental stages you didn’t have
● Take actions to support autonomy and decision making
● Add some routines to your life
● Start making decisions

Tools and Takeaways:
● Validation seekers should write a list of everything they want to hear from others and say these things to themselves
● Make a solo decision making challenge
● Write out a routine for yourself. Have one commitment every morning and one commitment every evening
● Start a meditation practice

Resources:

Christine Hassler

The Solo-Decision Making Challenge

Christine's Meditation Rx CD

@christinhassler

Nov 14, 2015

In this coaches corner Christine discusses whether or not it’s possible to change someone else.  Consider: Is there someone in your life you really hope will change? Do you find yourself taking on the responsibility for other people’s transformation? Do you even get annoyed when you see someone you care about not living into the potential you see in them? Christine explains why we are tempted to change others and teaches you how to let go of expectations of other people. You will learn that it is not your job or your right to save anyone along with some tips on how you actually can make an impact on the lives of others.

Nov 11, 2015

This episode will support you in getting through and to the other side of any kind of loss. My coaching call with Regina today uncovers the challenges she is having with grief over the loss of her husband. She says she regrets not being the best mother in the world and not living the life she wanted to live. She’s is questioning her purpose and experiencing quite a bit of apathy in her life.

Regina experiences an “aha” when she realizes she is able to create the positive future she desires.

Take note of Regina’s tone of voice before my coaching as she describes beating herself up and then again after we discuss her ability to practice self-love.

Regina shared her progress with me in an email after our session. She writes “I’ve started forgiving myself and when I find myself in a negative thought I stop and think “this isn’t self-love”.

It’s a reminder to all of us to live, not just exist. Find something you want to live for, even it seems silly and give yourself permission to love.

 


Consider/Ask Yourself:
Have you recently been through a loss and can’t seem to move on?
Have you been through a loss and are aware you need time to grieve?
Do you tend to look back on your life and wish you could have done things differently?
Are you at a point in your life where you are just existing and need to start living again?

Regina’s Question:
Regina would like to move past her sadness and regret of not living the life she wanted.

Regina’s Key Insights and Aha’s:
● There is a part of her that doesn’t want to “be” anymore
● She doesn’t believe we get more than one love in our lives
● She beats herself up a lot
● She knows if she could create a negative story for herself she is capable of creating a positive story too

How to get over it and on with it:
● Make a choice to start creating a future which is enlivening
● Give yourself permission to live
● Speak to yourself like a loving mother would to a child
● Write out some promises you will keep to yourself

Tools and Takeaways:
● Practice self-love
● Consider that loved ones who have transitioned are angels and guides in your life
● Accept that you did the best you could with the tools you had at the time

Resources:

1 « Previous 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 Next » 15