EP 259: Transforming Shame Into Service with Melissa

This call is about transforming shame, celebrating your gifts, and sharing them with others. Today’s caller, Melissa, is building a health coaching business and wants to embrace her purpose whole-heartedly but is holding back her light because of self-judgment and shame. We discuss things she can do to focus her energy on getting the things she wants from life as she serves others with her personal experience.

 

[For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode259]

 

Many people feel physical shame in some way. It can cause us to wear masks and deprive us of joy and self-expression. And, usually the thing we are most self-conscious about people don't even notice or think about as much as we do. If they do notice, they often don’t evaluate us because of it. I’ve never formed an opinion on someone because of their physical characteristics, and honestly, if someone does form an opinion about you because of something completely superficial, do you really want that person in your life?

 

Why are you fighting for approval from people you don’t really like? We give our power away when we seek the approval of others.

 

We can be too judgmental of other people, mostly because we are too judgmental of ourselves. If you want to put yourself out there in whatever way you feel called to do it, please do. You are needed. We need more people who have the consciousness of light and love being loud in the world. Too many people have loud voices that shouldn’t have a microphone. So, get your voice out there.

 

Stop letting fear of rejection and fear of judgment hold you back. Not everyone is going to like you and it is okay. You’re depriving the people who do resonate with you the connection and service you have to offer. Think about the magic you can create by not avoiding the people that may not like you or reject you and focus on compassionately serving others.

 

Stop falling into the avoidance trap and step into your love and light.

 

Are you ready to take your personal development to the next level and invest in yourself? Would an ally and a guide be helpful to you during this time? If so, I have two one-on-one coaching spots available. This type of deep work has incredible ripple effects in all areas of your life. Email [e-mail] for more information.

 

This is a trying time emotionally, mentally, and financially, so in August, I am giving away $5,000 in personal development grant money. Ten people will receive $500 to invest in themselves. Go to ChristineHassler.com/grant to fill out the application. I will announce the grant recipients on an Instagram Live.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

• Do you think that you have to be perfect or at a certain point before you really go after your dreams and what you want?
• Do you carry around shame?
• Do you feel a calling to do something, be it starting a business, applying for a new job, or dating again but are scared to do it because you’re afraid of judgment?
• Has shame robbed you of feeling a sense of belonging? Are you tired of letting shame rob you of what you deeply desire?

 

Melissa’s Question:

Melissa has a hard time speaking up and would like guidance on how to heal the shame she feels to gain the confidence to put herself out there.

 

Melissa’s Key Insights and Ahas:

• She lacks self-confidence.
• She attended the inner child workshop.
• She is building a coaching business.
• She lacked confidence because of a physical trait.
• She feels people may judge her.
• Shame disempowers her.
• She outsources her self-worth.
• She has a limiting belief that she isn’t enough.
• She numbed herself because she felt different from her peers.

 

How to Get Over It and On With It:

• Allow herself to be seen without the expectation of perfection.
• Do things that promote living into her purpose and her mission.
• Inspire others with her personal journey.
• Accept herself fully for who she is.

 

Takeaways:

• Take actions every day that move you into the vibration of who you want to be and what you want to do.
• Turn your shame into compassion and service. Use it to feel compassion for others who are feeling shame.
• Stop giving others power over you. Step into your love and light and make your voice heard.
• Live into your highest truth.

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Christine on Facebook

Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler

@ChristinHassler on Twitter

@ChristineHassler on Instagram

[e-mail]

[e-mail] — For information on any of my services.

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