If you feel like you have done lots of personal development work yet certain patterns or issues keep coming back, then don't miss this episode! Christine explains why you must plant flowers after you weed your consciousness and break circuits that are currently running your mental programming.
This episode is about the protective patterns we create when we don’t feel safe. Today’s caller, Amanda, says she wants guidance on how to access her sensuality but the core issue is truly about how she can feel safe and be vulnerable. We can’t feel safe in our sexuality or sensuality unless we feel safe in our vulnerability.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode370]
When women don’t feel safe in their bodies we tend to go into our heads. We talk, talk, talk, and don’t notice what is going on in our bodies. As human beings, we are a combination of doing and being, flowing and going, masculine and feminine, sensual and productive, right and left. So, one of our biggest turn-ons is safety. If we feel safe, we can let go. If we don’t feel safe, forget about it. We need to learn that it is safe to feel and to be emotionally vulnerable.
When we attempt to make changes while in frustration, it is important to shift into vulnerability and full self-expression. We need to accept all aspects of ourselves. Sensuality can feel scary because it feels out of control when we keep our safe place in our heads.
When we don’t feel safe, we have protective patterns that frustrate us. We judge the patterns and try to change them. But, nothing heals judgment. The first step of healing is to love, accept, and thank the pattern for protecting us.
If you don’t feel safe expressing yourself emotionally, you won’t feel safe expressing yourself sensually and sexually. When an expression is muted, all expressions are muted.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Amanda’s Question:
Amanda feels shame and guilt when it comes to sensuality and would like guidance on how to embody her sexuality without guilt and to feel good.
Amanda’s Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Takeaways:
Sponsors:
Organifi — is an organic superfood supplement line that makes quality, trusted nutrition convenient and acceptable. I love Organifi’s Gold and Gold Chocolate, which include relaxing mushrooms and root spices. It doesn’t spike your blood sugar like other hot chocolates. For 20% off your order use the code 'OVERIT’ to receive 20% off your order.
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
This episode is about upper limiting and discerning deal breakers versus growth opportunities in relationships. Everything seems to be finally working out for today’s caller, Daria, but she is having difficulty accepting it and her fiance. She asks for guidance on how to break existing patterns to make sure she doesn’t self-sabotage herself or her relationship.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode369]
It is very common that once we start to get the things we want, we start to wonder if we deserve them and if they are fleeting. We often have unexpected feelings when things start to go well.
When the hormones and infatuation of a new relationship wear off, in the realness of a relationship, there may be things about our partner that we don’t like. In most relationships, there are things about our partners we just don’t like and that we want to change. These things fall into several categories but more definitive would be to think of them as deal breakers or growth opportunities.
There are some things about our partner that we need to decide if it is truly annoying or not. Focusing on what we love about our partners and accepting them for who they are can go a long way. We can choose to focus on the great things about our partners.
When we want to request a change of behavior from our partner, they must feel safe in the relationship.
My Women’s Retreat is this weekend, October 7‒9, 2022 in Austin. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat to get more information about this gentle and nourishing life-changing opportunity. Whatever your issue or concern there is a place for you.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Daria’s Question:
Daria is feeling a sudden change of feelings toward her fiance and would like guidance to ensure she doesn’t self-sabotage.
Daria’s Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Takeaways:
Sponsors:
Caraway Cookware — Now that I am cooking for my baby I want to make sure I have the least amount of toxins in my house. Caraway cookware is beautiful, easy to clean and use and it is non-toxic. It has a naturally slick ceramic surface and comes in cookware and bakeware sets. Go to CarawayHome.com/Overit to take advantage of the exclusive 10% off limited-time offer and use Overit at checkout.
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
This episode is about being the parent you always wanted and wanted to be. Today’s caller, Carrie, wants to repair a strained relationship with her children. She feels shame about her past behaviors and wants guidance on how to build a connection with them and their children. There is a lot of vulnerability and courage in this honest conversation.
It can be scary to be a generational pattern breaker and it takes a lot of courage to follow through but it can transform our relationships.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode368]
Many parents carry around a silent shame about some of the choices they made as parents. Parenting is hard. It doesn’t come with a manual. Creating a healthy environment for our children is challenging when we don’t have good parenting ourselves. We are still impacted by our trauma and our hurt; it can feel impossible not to pass it on.
The hard part about trauma, or behavior we categorize as hurtful or bad, is that it is not due to anyone setting out to hurt another person. People who have unprocessed trauma and don’t know how to deal with it. People who are hurt and sad all the time haven’t gotten to their anger. People who are angry and explosive haven’t gotten to their hurt and sadness.
What happens with parent-child relationships is the hurt parent wants a two-way street. Meaning, the hurt parent wants the child to make it okay for them as well, but that is not the child’s job. It is the parent’s job to make it okay for the child.
Give your children the opportunity to hear the things they always wanted to hear.
Register for my upcoming Women’s Retreat which will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat to get more information about this gentle and nourishing life-changing opportunity. Whatever your issue or concern there is a place for you.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Carrie’s Question:
Carrie was a parent who inflicted trauma on her children. She would like guidance on how to repair their relationship.
Carrie’s Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
This episode is about navigating a relationship with a new baby coming. Today’s caller, Cassie, is about to have a child but is uncertain about staying with the baby’s father. She would like guidance about how to feel supported emotionally and financially during this trying time.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode367]
It is difficult enough for women who are becoming new mothers but for them to not have support can be really challenging. But, on the other hand, couples who stay together for the children who are not in a healthy relationship don’t have kids that turn out any better than the kids whose parents got divorced. Kids pick up on unhealthy relationships when they are not aligned and may model their future relationships on them.
When a baby comes, it transforms and changes a relationship. The focus of attention is on the baby and not as much on the partners. That is why it is important to have clear agreements in place about parenting responsibilities before a child is born.
I’m excited about my upcoming Women’s Retreat which will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat to get more information about this life-changing opportunity. Whatever your issue or concern there is a place for you.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Cassie’s Question:
Cassie is pregnant with her partner of 2-plus years. She is having some difficulty in her relationship and would like guidance on whether or not to leave the relationship.
Cassie’s Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
Christine shares five reminders that may come at the perfect time for you. If you are disappointed with something in your life, judging yourself, lacking in self-care, don't feel like all the "work" you are doing is paying off, or just need some inspiration today - don't miss this episode!
This episode is a couple’s coaching session with the partners currently experiencing struggles in their relationship. Rory & Tyler have listened to their partner’s individual sessions and spoken with each other about what they heard. Christine discusses strategies and opportunities the couple can use to move their relationship forward.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode366]
Relationships are challenging. It is generally easy in the first year when there is infatuation and hormones but afterward comes the depth, transformation, and healing. In any relationship, struggles and doubts are normal and natural. It is important to uncover where the doubt is coming from. Does it come from red flags or deep intuition?
There is a difference between a relationship that has potential versus a relationship that has the key ingredients to go the difference. Love isn’t always enough for a relationship to go the distance and to be healthy. However, love plus a commitment to do the work independently and together can be the game-changer in a relationship.
Making loving requests is a great way to not build resentment in relationships. Requests from a loving place are much different than demands from a defensive or pissed-off place. People who come from a defensive or pissed-off place have difficulty getting their needs met.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Rory & Tyler’s Question:
After their separate coaching sessions, Rory & Tyler come together to work through their issues and discuss ways to move their relationship forward.
Rory & Tyler’s Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Sponsor:
Mind Doc App is an easy way to bolster your mental health and get constructive suggestions. Whether you are generally fine or struggling with something, you can answer a few questions in the Mind Doc app a few times a day and the app’s algorithm provides you with an overview of your mental wellbeing. Get 50% off a 6-month subscription to the app at https://minddoc.onelink.me/D1u6/qryj27lw, and use the code CHRISTINE50
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
This episode is a couple’s coaching session with the female partner in the relationship. Today’s caller, Rory, finds herself at a crossroads after being in a three-year relationship with Tyler. She would like guidance on whether or not she can get her needs met in this relationship. During this session, Christine questions whether there are enough shared values for both of them to go the distance in a side-by-side partnership.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode365]
The length of a relationship does not determine its success. If a relationship doesn’t last, it is not a failure. Some of the most successful relationships have ended. Relationships are successful when you learn a lot or heal from them. Unfortunately, love isn’t enough in a relationship.
Physically, for men, attraction is very important. They like to feel attracted to their partner consistently over the long term. For a female to feel sexual and safe, she needs to feel like there is a commitment to consciousness, emotional vulnerability, and intimacy.
A couple needs shared values, vision, the right polarity, and an equal amount of willingness and commitment. A couple must want the same things in life to make a relationship work.
I’m happy to announce that my next Women’s Retreat will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat to get more information about this life-changing opportunity. There is still time to register!
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Rory’s Question:
Rory is at a crossroads with her partner and trying to figure out if the relationship has run its course.
Rory’s Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Sponsor:
Caraway Cookware — I am a stickler for healthy food. I worked long and hard to make sure I have the least amount of toxins in my house. Caraway cookware is beautiful, easy to clean and use and it is non-toxic. Its naturally slick ceramic surface needs minimum oil or butter for the slide-off-the-pan eggs we all love. Go to CarawayHome.com/Overit to take advantage of a 10% off limited-time offer and use Overit at checkout.
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
In this episode I share my fertility and pregnancy journey. My intention is to share information that may be helpful and inspiring. I've received a lot of questions about getting pregnant in my 40s and I've been hesitant to share since fertility is such a tender topic and I have deep compassion for anyone going through fertility or pregnancy challenges. Please know you are not doing anything wrong and there is nothing wrong with you. I hope this episode is helpful.
This episode is a couple’s coaching session with the male partner in the relationship. Today’s caller, Tyler, is in a relationship with an amazing woman. He says they are at a crossroads and would like guidance on whether or not to make her his life partner or if they are better served to let each other go. Christine uncovers a childhood wound that may be keeping him from experiencing true intimacy with his partner.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode364]
In a relationship, over time the attraction changes. It becomes more about intimacy and about exploring sexuality together. The initial infatuation attraction is easy. That is the low-hanging fruit attraction. Next-level relationships take intimacy, sexuality, and affection to another level. In a relationship, it is about exploring and going deeper with each other and not relying on the quick high.
The beginning of a relationship is almost always the easiest. We have hormones attracting us to each other and things are new and shiny. It is when we go deeper that intimacy blocks reveal themselves.
Remember, more often than not, things that come up in our relationships stem from things that we did not get in our childhood.
I’m happy to announce that my next Women’s Retreat will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat to get more information about this life-changing opportunity. The early-bird promo ends on Sept. 1, 2022. So register ASAP!
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Tyler’s Question:
Tyler is in a relationship and is looking for guidance on how to make strides toward making her a life partner or if they are better served to let each other go.
Tyler’s Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Sponsor:
Mind Doc App is an easy way to bolster your mental health and get constructive suggestions. Whether you are generally fine or struggling with something, you can answer a few questions in the Mind Doc app a few times a day and the app’s algorithm provides you with an overview of your mental wellbeing. Get 50% off a 6-month subscription to the app at https://minddoc.onelink.me/D1u6/qryj27lw, and use the code CHRISTINE50
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
The human experience is a beautiful thing, even when it’s challenging. It is sacred when someone is vulnerable. Today’s caller, Toni, shares her vulnerability as she asks for guidance. She reveals that many of the decisions of her life come from a place of fear. Toni is confused about what security and love really are.
We talk about having a relationship with a higher power especially after she has gone through times in her life when she didn’t feel there was any kind of God. There IS some kind of higher power. There are so many names for it, so many ways people interpret it, but to me, it is infinite unconditional love. It may be hard to believe in any kind of God, when there is so much suffering in the world.
The best way I can attempt to understand all the horrible things that happen, is that they happen as a result of human choice and free will. While many human choices are still made from a place of pain and fear, we are in a time of awakening. We are in a massive shift in consciousness. What is available to us all, is to make the choice to see the world through spiritual eyes. See ourselves through more spiritual eyes, without judgment; to see through the eyes of infinite and unconditional love. To heal our own pain that is preventing us from feeling connected to a higher power.
We are moving into more acceptance, forgiveness and gratitude. If you are craving a deeper spiritual connection, please don’t wait for God to prove itself to you -- instead, open your heart, and pray to be shown the way. You are a spiritual being having a human experience. You are one. You are love. You are connected.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
● Do you feel you are operating more out of fear than faith?
● Are you making a lot of decisions with fear or self-doubt?
● Are you a people pleaser, who is afraid of disappointing people?
● Is connecting to a higher power challenging to you? If you do have a connection, would you like to deepen it?
● Are there situations in your life that make you doubt whether a God exists?
Toni's Question: Toni feels all aspects of her life are affected by her making decisions from a place of fear. She would like to find a way to think more productively.
x
Toni's Key Insights and Aha’s:
● She fears failing and disappointing people.
● Her self-worth is based on her people pleasing.
● She’s confused about what security and love really are.
● She hasn’t felt protected, or connected to her spirituality, since her father passed.
● She feels like she would be clearer, if she had a spiritual connection.
● She has been operating in survival mode.
● She should know she is not broken.
● She can change her relationship with herself, today.
● She can focus on her blessings, not on her fears.
How to Get Over It and On With It:
● She should realize she can access her spirituality.
● She should start processing her pain, and remove judgment, to arrive at forgiveness and love.
● She should put herself in an environment where she can heal.
● She can start cultivating her relationship with God, by talking to him/her.
Assignments and Takeaways:
● What is in your way of a connection to a higher power?
● What is keeping you in patterns of people pleasing and indecision?
● Do you have old trauma that needs to be processed?
● What beliefs may be keeping you from having beliefs?
● What religious upbringing did you have, which no longer resonates with you?
● You need to find which truth resonates with you.
● Look for a spiritual community of people who are committed to awakening, and who know we are all connected to source. ● Start to develop a relationship with your higher power.
● Pray. Pray for experiences, feelings, and pray to be shown the way.
Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Christine Hassler Free E-book
Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler
@christinhassler on Twitter@christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Over It and On With It Initial Podcast
This episode is about speaking our needs in relationships and clearing out relationships that no longer serve us. Today’s caller, Josie, recently broke up with a long-term friend. She is feeling guilt around her decision. Christine reveals how friendships can be a beautiful teacher for us. We attract and draw in people in all different capacities and often friends that trigger us and reveal our issues. Yet, some friendships have expiration dates just like romantic relationships.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode363]
We don’t always think of friendships as a way to learn about our unresolved issues, particularly with our parents. Yet, we are always seeking to evolve and grow. Our subconscious is always at work trying to meet our needs. When we have unmet needs we look to people who seem familiar to the people who didn’t meet our needs in the first place.
If you have a friendship that is not working and draining you and you keep trying but it feels overwhelming, it is okay to end the friendship. It is better to end it and have a clearing and completion conversation than to make excuses and dread the person’s phone call or see them when you just don’t want to be their friend.
It takes up a lot of energetic space and it is not kind to the other person to pretend to be their friend. Complete any friendships that are not serving you or that you have grown out of. It is OK to move on.
I’m happy to announce that my next Women’s Retreat will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat or listen to my Coaches Corner with Jill to get more information about this life-changing opportunity. The early-bird registration promo ends on Sept. 1, 2022.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Josie’s Question:
Josie recently had a breakup with a life-long friend and she is doubting her decision.
Josie’s Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Takeaways:
Sponsor:
Mind Doc App is an easy way to bolster your mental health and get constructive suggestions. Whether you are generally fine or struggling with something, you can answer a few questions in the Mind Doc app a few times a day and the app’s algorithm provides you with an overview of your mental wellbeing. Get 50% off a 6-month subscription to the app at https://minddoc.onelink.me/D1u6/qryj27lw, and use the code Christine50.
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
Collectively we are all going through a rebalancing of masculine and feminine energies, not only in what it means to be a man or a woman, but what it means to be human. We are just moving into rebalancing this energy so masculine and feminine energies can be in flow together. While women struggle to find their place in the masculine energy, men struggle to fit into more feminine things, such as being vulnerable or pursuing more creative endeavors that may feel less manly. This is not a time to be discouraged. We are all longing for belonging and connection.
This episode is about questioning the old paradigms and rules. Today’s caller, Jake, thinks he is stuck, but from my point of view he is at a crossroads. Will he continue to let old programming and belief systems drive him, or will he make a commitment to move past the fear of old paradigms, and step into his full potential?
During the call, I didn’t want to take Jake down the road of investigating his past, because he had already spent too much time analyzing the past and worrying about the future. Jake said he had an easy-going upbringing without a lot of drama or trauma.
Often, feeling that degree of comfort as a child makes it harder to take risks as an adult, because we don’t have enough experiential evidence to recover from failure, risks, and things that scare us. We have to stop asking ourselves why, why, why. We don’t have to self-analyze ourselves to death. We need to be aware of the patterns and self-limiting beliefs, so we can shift them. We all need to step up into our full potential, and not allow outdated paradigms hold us back. Men, it is ok to be vulnerable, to talk about your doubts, and to admit to confusion about who you are, and how to find your purpose.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
● Are you a man, or with a man, who is questioning his career path or purpose?
● Is fear something that is stopping you?
● Do you relate to sabotaging yourself?
Jake 's Question: Jake feels drawn toward another career change. He wants to know how to get out of his own head to move forward.
Jake 's Key Insights and Aha’s:
● He is sabotaging himself.
● He has competing intentions.
● He has a propensity to not follow through.
● He battles with fear and low self-worth.
● He has time management issues.
● He has created motion toward what he wants by putting himself out there.
● He is afraid he won’t live up to his full potential.
How to Get Over It and On With It:
● He should invest in a coach.
● He should read The Way of the Superior Man, by David Deida, and other personal development books.
● He should work on shifting his belief system and get clear about what his vision is.
● Over the next 40 days, he should do 10 things that get him out of his comfort zone.
● He should make a schedule for himself and stick to it.
Assignments and Takeaways:
● Go out and engage in behavior which pulls you out of your comfort zone, to develop trust in yourself.
● Commit to rewiring your brain. Visit NeuroGym to learn more.
● Stop obsessing about what you think is a liability.
● Show up fully for yourself, be your own word. Make commitments and don’t break them. If you do break them, re-negotiate and start again.
Resources: Christine Hassler - Book a session to be on the show! Christine Hassler Podcasts Christine Hassler Free E-book Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com NeuroGym
This episode is about getting the love we deserve. Today’s caller, Rachel, is in an issue-based relationship with a partner who doesn’t make her a priority. An issue-based relationship is when unresolved issues bring two people together. These relationships tend to be stressful, on-again-off-again, and come with anxiety, but the physical attraction is often very strong. Whether or not you are in a relationship you will get some gems from this episode.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode362]
Do you want the love of your life to be someone who causes you anxiety, who doesn’t make compromises for you, or who doesn’t make you a priority? Don’t you want better? We all deserve better than that. The problem is we get the love we think we deserve, not the love we actually deserve.
Many of us find ourselves in a position where we know something isn’t good for us. We know we want, and deserve better, but we just can’t let it go. It’s a form of addiction. It’s codependency. It is having our unmet needs tickled just enough that we go back for more. But, it’s not love. It’s not a true connection or partnership.
Something that can trip us up and make us suffer way more than we need to is when we have a rose-colored glasses tint on the way we see things. Because, when we do, we are more in love with an ideal than we are with the reality of things.
When we experience a love that is not based on unresolved issues, it makes us glad we left the relationships that were based on our issues. Love that comes from a healthy place is amazing!
If someone isn’t going out of their way to make you a priority, it is a red flag.
I’m happy to announce that my next Women’s Retreat will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat or listen to my Coaches Corner with Jill to get more information about this life-changing opportunity. The early-bird registration promo ends on Sept. 1, 2022.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Rachel’s Question:
Rachel has an on-again-off-again relationship with someone she considers the love of her life and would like guidance on.
Rachel’s Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Takeaways:
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
You are going to learn so much from this episode!! And get to listen to a live demo of Dr Schwartz doing parts work with me. Richard Schwartz began his career as a family therapist and an academic at the University of Illinois at Chicago. There he discovered that family therapy alone did not achieve full symptom relief and in asking patients why, he learned that they were plagued by what they called “parts.” From these explorations with parts work, the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model was born in the early 1980s.
IFS is now evidence-based and has become a widely-used form of psychotherapy, particularly with trauma. It provides a non-pathologizing, optimistic, and empowering perspective and a practical and effective set of techniques for working with individuals, couples, families, and more recently, corporations and classrooms.
In 2013 Schwartz left the Chicago area and now lives in Brookline, MA where he is on the faculty of the Department of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School.
This episode is about releasing grief and confusion and allowing ourselves the time and space to heal. Today’s caller, Amy, is 25-plus years past when she decided to have an abortion and is triggered by everything going on with Roe vs. Wade. We talk about it as an example of how grief never really goes away. She would like guidance about how to move past her shame, guilt, and lingering grief. If you are someone who has chosen to have an abortion or had to, I hope you find comfort in this episode.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode361]
Sometimes we have to slow down to speed up as we may be triggering our trauma with too much personal development work. Too much good work can trigger trauma and we may be doing too much of a good thing. When we grow up in chaos, our nervous systems become overloaded and personal development work can trigger it.
Trauma is too much, too soon, too fast. When we work on ourselves too much it can trigger our trauma bell. Even though personal development is good, to our nervous system it feels like an overload and too much to process.
One of the biggest tips for healing trauma is when we are in any kind of overload, we take a pause and ask ourselves what we need at the moment. It can take practice. The better we get at it the more we start to be able to get out of the trigger. When we are conditioned at operating with a hyper-aroused nervous system, pausing and pacing ourselves is the key to healing.
I’m happy to announce that my next Women’s Retreat will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat or listen to my Coaches Corner with Jill to get more information about this life-changing opportunity.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Amy’s Question:
Amy would like some deep healing for her 16-year-old inner child who made a decision that she continues to guilt and shame herself for.
Amy’s Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Takeaways:
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
If you feel like you have a lot of awareness but things in your life are not changing…it may be time for some “experiential” work. In this episode Christine and Jill about what happens at Christine’s Signature Retreat to help you discern if it’s right for you.
More info about the retreat here:
This episode is about standing up for yourself in a relationship. Today’s caller, Marc, feels a shift in his 20-year marriage. He is willing to work on the relationship but his wife is avoiding it. This episode is relatable to many people because we discuss why he doesn’t take a stand for himself and how it takes two people to make a relationship work.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode360]
Many midlife crises happen because people find themselves in a place where they can’t suppress anymore. Often, their kids are older, they are set in their careers, and their life is a bit more predictable, then all of a sudden they find it difficult to suppress what they feel they have missed out on.
When an individual feels they’ve sacrificed a lot of their life in parenthood or the like, a sense of selfishness or entitlement bubbles up and they go in the opposite direction of where they have been. And, a person who is more reactive and triggered shouldn’t be leading a relationship because they will lead the relationship to a dead end.
Sometimes our less obvious wounds are more impactful. A lot of time the person who holds the more feminine pole in a relationship often wants the masculine pole to lead, to come to us and let us know when things are off.
I’m happy to announce that my next Women’s Retreat will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat to get more information about this life-changing opportunity.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Marc’s Question:
Marc noticed a shift in his 20-year marriage. He feels as if he is in limbo. He is asking for guidance on what his next steps should be.
Marc’s Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
Control is something we all struggle with. We think we have 100% control over life, but we don’t. We do have choices and dominion but we don’t have total control. Our egos like to have certainty and to have a plan, which is rooted in fear. It is scary not to know what is coming next. If we try to control every aspect of our lives, we often miss out on all the beautiful opportunities the universe has for us.
Sometimes the opportunities come in the form of challenges, which are not to punish or test us but to help us grow. During these times it is important that we do not go into victim mode. It is also important that when we go through uncertainty we don’t try to immediately fill up that space with something new.
Sometimes we just have to sit in the discomfort of uncertainty to see what it is there for to teach us. If we don’t deal with our Expectation Hangovers they will keep repeating and the same types of disappointments will keep coming up.
It’s OK if you don’t have it all figured out. A quarter-life crisis is normal. It is the time when many of us step into our personal life journey. Challenges are what build our grit and character.
I invite you to join me for my retreat in magical Bali which includes meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the opportunity to meet soul friends. There are only 3 reservations left. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join any of my events or business programs.
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Consider/Ask Yourself:
Frankie’s Question:
Frankie would like to know how to move into a place of acceptance about where she is in her life.
Frankie’s Key Insights and Aha’s:
How to get over it and on with it:
Assignments and Takeaways:
Resources:
Christine Hassler
Christine Hassler Podcasts
Christine Hassler Free E–book
Expectation Hangover
20 Something 20 Everything
@christinhassler on Twitter
@christinehassler on Instagram
Christine@christinehassler.com
Jill@christinehassler.com
This episode is about making a big decision. Today’s caller, Catherine, is considering moving in with her boyfriend but isn’t sure whether or not she is ready. She would like guidance on how to make a big decision. We discuss how she can use the intuitive decision-making process to become clear about what she wants and the learning opportunities of relationships.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode359]
When we feel that we have to make every decision on our own, it can keep us from speaking our needs in relationships. To break the pattern of feeling like you have to do everything on your own requires speaking your needs and asking for help and support. In the masculine-feminine dynamic when we are doing things on our own, not in collaboration, we can lean a bit too much into our masculine energy.
It is important to stretch ourselves, but not stretch ourselves so much that we snap. If we want continued progress in our life we stretch ourselves just enough where we feel the stretch but we don’t snap.
An issue-based relationship is where the chemistry is really hot and heavy early on but what is really attracting the partners is unresolved issues. You may find yourself attracted to someone who is like your mother or father or who triggers your insecurities or biggest wounds. We tend to draw in relationships that have tons of red flags but the passion and chemistry keep us going back for more.
The learning opportunity of issue-based relationships is to heal the wound that attracts us to a person in the first place.
I’m happy to announce that my next Women’s Retreat will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat to get more information about this life-changing opportunity.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Catherine’s Question:
Catherine would like guidance about her relationship and about whether or not she should move in with her partner.
Catherine’s Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Sponsor:
Cured — Would you like to feel plugged in without an extra cup of coffee or two? RISE is formulated by an in-house herbalist and is all about getting an extra boost of energy. To help you stay laser-focused on your goals and reduce your caffeine intake, RISE includes Lion’s Mane & Cordyceps mushrooms, ginseng, broad-spectrum CBD, and more. Go to Curednutrition.com/OVERIT and use the promo code OVERIT at check out for 20% off.
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
Do you exhibit a type of behavior or personality trait you don’t necessarily love about yourself? It could be moodiness or it could be being extremely judgmental or it could be an emotional state you have a tendency to default to like sadness, worry, anger or fear. Women often have a difficult time dealing with anger because we have not been encouraged to express it. We may default to sadness which limits us from reaching our passion and our fire. We suppress our emotions and any big emotion we suppress will eventually leak. Anger becomes irritability, sadness becomes depression and shame comes out as insecurity. Suppressed emotions can also lead to physical ailments. It is not healthy to suppress our emotions.
Today’s caller Monica acknowledges her own moodiness and is wondering if it is something she can change or if it’s a fixed personality trait. She suppresses her anger and doesn’t speak her truth. If there is something about you that does not feel good to you, like moodiness, you can change it. You just need to uncover why it’s there in the first place. Moodiness can be a messenger that you may be suppressing pent up anger and frustration. It is liberating to express your anger and be free of the moodiness. I invite all of you to join me for my retreat in magical Bali which will include meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the opportunity to meet soul friends. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join the festivities or to join me in Los Angeles in July for my signature retreat.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
● Is there something about you that you would like to change? Is it an inherent part of your personality or do you believe you can change it? Are you willing to do the work to change it?
● Do you experience times when you are irritable or snap at someone? How do you express your anger?
● Do you feel self-expressed? Do you fully feel your feelings?
Monica’s Question:
Monica recognizes she is a moody person and would like to know if she is able to shift out of it or if it is part of her personality.
Monica’s Key Insights and Aha’s:
● Her moodiness stems from suppressing her anger
● When she speaks her truth she feels shut down
● She has trouble expressing herself
● She doesn’t like conflict
● She becomes the victim, as a coping strategy
How to get over it and on with it:
● Realize her irritability and bluntness are actually inner anger leaking out
● She should do the Temper Tantrum technique and 32 days of the Release Writing technique, which are in her copy of Expectation Hangover
● She should step away from the conversation and get her anger out, on her own
Tools and Takeaways:
● Identify the ways you may be leaking. Know where you are suppressing and how you may be expressing it in other ways.
● If you sense you may have anger you have yet to acknowledge, start Release Writing.
● Work through the emotional section of Expectation Hangover, in particular, the Adult Temper Tantrum and Release Writing techniques.
● Speak your truth and process your raw feelings to eliminate suppression.
Resources: Christine Hassler Expectation Hangover @christinhassler on Twitter@christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Jill@christinehassler.com
This episode is about understanding why we do the things we do and how to heal. Today’s caller, Donna, endured traumatic experiences as a child. She eats for comfort because she was not nurtured or prioritized as a child. People don’t start emotionally eating if they grew up in a family where they felt safe to express their emotions. We talk about two great actionable tools you can use if you struggle with emotional or binge eating, or not feeling like you have worth.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode358]
Every little child needs to feel nurtured and soothed when they have feelings. When we have a super-traumatized part of ourselves we need to figure out a way to flood the system with a sensory experience. Some people choose drugs, alcohol, sex, gambling, and some choose food. Food offers a flood of sensory experiences so it helps to keep the trauma hidden.
It is amazing how much we judge ourselves for the challenges we have. We often don’t understand why it is not easy to change or do things differently when what we are doing is completely reasonable based on our trauma. It’s not that it is okay to use trauma as a scapegoat for the rest of our lives, however, we must acknowledge our story and understand that, of course, we are dealing with things the way we do.
We must have compassion for ourselves before we can change. No one has ever healed in the energy of judgment. No one has ever healed by beating the crap out of themselves. No one has ever healed believing they are still broken. We want to honor and acknowledge our past and understand that it makes sense that it is difficult or harder for us to change.
The only way to break out of the pattern of not feeling like we are a priority is to find the source, then perform the daily practice of looking in the mirror, being present with ourselves, and saying I love you.
The Inner Child workshop is a tool that helps us reconnect with our little one and facilitates healing. Find the recorded version of the Inner Child workshop here.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Donna’s Question:
Donna would like guidance on how to make herself a priority.
Donna’s Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Sponsor:
Cured — Would you like to feel plugged in without an extra cup of coffee, or two? RISE is formulated by an in-house herbalist and is all about getting an extra boost of energy. To help you stay laser-focused on your goals and reduce your caffeine intake, RISE includes Lion’s Mane & Cordyceps mushrooms, ginseng, broad-spectrum CBD, and more. Go to Curednutrition.com/OVERIT and use the promo code OVERIT at check out for 20% off.
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
This episode is about asking for what you need in relationships. Today’s caller, Megan, feels overwhelmed when faced with too many choices and is afraid to be truly seen. She doesn’t want her pattern of uncertainty to sabotage her new relationship. Like in many coaching sessions, her initial question isn’t exactly what we focus on. This is for anyone who has trouble making decisions, doubts themselves, or is in sabotaging patterns.
For empaths, love can feel overwhelming because we love so deeply. When we are in a relationship it can feel smothering and overwhelming. Instead of communicating that we need boundaries and space with love we are often afraid of confrontation or don’t want to make the other person upset. So, we unconsciously push them away by either judging them internally, nitpicking, or acting out in other ways. Empaths need to know what they need — especially at the beginning of the relationship. When you are first dating someone you need to be vocal and ask for what you need.
Boundaries in a relationship and asking for what you need is important. That way you don’t have to build walls. You can have a door and that door can be open most of the time but sometimes you need to shut it and put on the do not disturb sign. The people in your life that love you will understand. It will allow them to spend time with themselves.
When our heart is broken either through a breakup or the death of someone, we want to love again but we are scared because it feels risky.
Fear of making the wrong decision will keep you from making the decision. Basically, fear complicates everything in your life. The more you can drop into love and your inner knowing and move out of the energy of fear the more clarity you will have in all aspects of your life.
I am a proud sponsor of B-school which is an online training program for modern entrepreneurs taught by Marie Forleo. When you register through my link you will receive special bonuses from me. I include four group coaching calls of 90 min each, four custom meditations for entrepreneurs, access to my Facebook group, a one day retreat, plus free access to my master class for coaches. Go to ChristineHassler.com/bschool or email Jill@ChristineHassler.com for more information. For free training videos from Marie go to ChristineHassler.com/training.