This episode is for anyone who feels like they are missing out, they are being left behind, they are not enough or they do not belong.
Today’s caller, Emma, is feeling left out and resentment towards friends who are continuing their relationships with her ex after their breakup. Her frustrations are bringing up old issues she has been carrying around for a long time. We uncover the constant moving she went through as a child is still a core issue for her.
It’s important to remember not to minimize things from your past. As a human, there are things you have gone through that are challenging. Things that happen can create certain belief systems and misunderstandings that perpetuate patterns, behaviors and reactions you don’t like.
Resentment and anger protect us from our deeper feelings. It’s easier to feel mad about something than it is to feel the hurt of being left out. We all want to feel connected and that we belong. Feeling separate in any way is painful and it reinforces the core misunderstanding we are separate from God, separate from the universe or separate from each other. Healing that wound allows us to feel we are not separate and to feel we are connected.
If you have standards or conditions about what it takes for you to be good enough, know that you are good enough just the way you are.
Connect to who you really are and discover your Secret Sauce with the 4-video training series I put on my site for you. Your secret sauce is a unique combination of your experience, talents, life lessons and passions that can help you feel a sense of belonging and confidence. Go to www.christinehassler.com/ss
I invite you to join me for my retreat in magical Bali which includes meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the opportunity to meet soul friends. There are only 2 reservations left. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join any of my events or business programs.
Emma is having difficulty releasing her emotions, which are triggered by her jealousy and frustration over shared friendships after her breakup.
Emma's Key Insights and Aha’s:
How to get over it and on with it:
Assignments and Takeaways:
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As an Author, Speaker, Trainer, and Executive Coach Steve Sisgold has spent the past 25 years studying and teaching the relationship between beliefs held in the body and success, how the body “billboard” sends micro messages that affect authentic communication and how self-awareness lowers stress and boosts peak performance. He has amazing books, Whole Body Intelligence and What’s Your Body Telling You? and is a breakthrough coach to many best-selling self help authors, Grammy and Oscar winners, CEO’s, a Major League baseball President, as well as Wellness and Business leaders. Prior to what he is doing now Steve Sisgold applied the principles he teaches, in the business world. He owned and directed a successful Advertising and PR firm, and was #1 of 500 sales people and a national sales trainer with a Fortune 100 company. Learn more about Steve here: http://wholebodyintelligence.com/
Today’s caller, Mia, is dealing with sexual harassment from her boss at a newly acquired job and she is scared to stand up for herself. This situation is in no way Mia’s fault. While listening, I want you to take note of your reaction to what Mia shares. Does it make you angry? Does it trigger anything in your past? If you react to anything she shares, reach out for help and support. Reaching out for help is the only way to get out of a toxic situation. If you are in a situation in which you feel you are being abused or harassed in some way, please do not keep it a secret. It’s important not to allow judgment to blind us from seeing the learning in a situation. Sexual harassment is one of those things that can trigger a lot of judgment. From a spiritual perspective, there is no good, bad, right or wrong. Being disrespected is not something to accept in the name of love or spirituality. However, going into blame mode doesn’t solve anything either. Our relationship with ourselves, from our self-talk to self-perception to our daily habits, directly impacts the people we attract and how people in our lives treat us. If we want to change the way people treat us, we need to change ourselves first. Coach's Tip - The reason I didn’t start off with taking legal action is because it would have been judgmental and highly reactionary. I needed to do some detective work first, to see if this situation was bringing up unresolved issues that were coming up to heal, which is what was happening in Mia’s case. I invite you to join me for my retreat in magical Bali which includes meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the opportunity to meet soul friends. There are only 2 reservations left. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join any of my events or business programs. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Is there or has there been someone you felt disrespected or harassed by? ● Do you hold back from standing up for yourself, because you don’t want to make waves? ● Are you in an unhealthy situation, but staying in it for money or job security? ● Are there unresolved issues from your past that are haunting your present? Mia's Question: Mia is uncomfortable in her new job because her boss is sexually harassing her. She would like to know why she may be attracting men who are disrespectful to her throughout her life. Mia's Key Insights and Aha’s: ● Her father didn’t show emotions towards her ● She is the first woman from her family to work for a corporation ● She may believe that as a woman, she has to behave differently than a man ● She doesn’t trust men and doesn’t feel safe with them ● Her self-esteem took a hit after her last relationship How to get over it and on with it: ● She needs to update what she believes about men ● She should stand up for herself if she feels disrespected in anyway ● She needs to be in an environment where she is encouraged and supported Assignments and Takeaways: ● If you feel you are in a situation in which you are being harassed in any way, do not be silent. Seek out some kind of professional support and document what is happening. ● If feeling disrespected is a theme in your life, take a look at your relationship with yourself. How can you shift how you treat yourself, so that consequently other people start treating you differently? ● Do you need to set boundaries with some people in your life, so you feel more respected? Sponsor: Onnit Wellness - Receive a 10% discount on your purchase when you order through this link. Audible - Free audiobook download and a 30-day free trial. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Secret Sauce Training Series Christine Hassler Free E-book @chrishassler on Snapchat @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Jill@christinehassler.com Updo Cure kybc7qyb
I am so honored to have my mom as our guest this week on coaches corner. She is a licensed professional counselor, hypnotherapist, wife, mother and grandmother. We talk candidly about how she impacted my life, the challenges she had as my mom and what has kept her 42 year old marriage to my dad together. She also shares her professional advice for how to heal issues from childhood and have successful relationships as an adult. Enjoy getting to know my mom! Here is info to connect with her and get her books and audio downloads: For individual, couples or family therapy in the Dallas or Austin area: firstname.lastname@example.org Access her hypnotherapy CDs: Hypnosis to Motivate You to Exercise and Eat Well - EP All Is Well - Hypnosis for Insomnia Book: Chip the Puppy with Two Homes https://www.amazon.com/Chip-Puppy-Homes-Jodi-Hassler/dp/1439222894
It really is so important to give ourselves permission to go after what we want to do. For example, I recently gave myself permission to go on a trip to Colombia with the caveat that I would work while I was there. When I ran into wifi issues and couldn’t communicate with my team I had a bit of an Expectation Hangover. So, I decided that instead of being frustrated about it, I would move into acceptance and give myself permission to take some time off. When I fight for my will over thy will I almost always end up getting frustrated. Emily is normally a driven and passionate person. However, she called in because she is feeling a bit lackluster lately. She’s done a lot of personal development work, but can’t seem to find her mojo to implement the new things she would like in her life. She’s been waiting for something to give her permission to act. It’s important for her to start coming up with all the reasons why she can do something, instead of making up excuses about why she can’t. Everything begins with just one step. In my book, Expectation Hangover, I call this Proactive Surrender. It’s about taking one step with intention and involvement and then allowing for feedback. To co-create is about being in flow with the universe and letting go of attachments of control and planning. Be open to how and where the universe wants to lead you. Also, there are a lot of people who get stuck in the personal awareness trap. People who read a lot of books, listen to podcasts, and become very aware but things don’t ever seem to shift for them. If you find yourself in the awareness trap you must start taking action. Coach's Tip - When working with your clients be mindful of having them speak in “I” language rather than in the second person because when we speak in the second person we disassociate and we don’t own what we are saying. It’s important to bring clients back to using “I” language without making them feel wrong. I invite you to join me for my retreat in magical Bali which includes meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the opportunity to meet soul friends. There are only 2 reservations left. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join any of my events or business programs. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Are you feeling a bit lackluster? Would you like to feel more driven or inspired? ● Do you need to give yourself permission to do something or are you waiting for a permission slip? ● Have you made your human desires bad? Are you trying to get rid of your ego? ● Do you have a heartfelt desire but can’t seem to take the first step? Emily's Question: Emily who is normally driven and passionate finds herself feeling a bit lackluster and lost. She is feeling symptoms of the Imposter syndrome and may be in a personal awareness trap. She would like to know how to get inspired. Emily's Key Insights and Aha’s: ● Her ego isn’t all bad ● She needs to listen to her voice of inspiration ● She doesn’t need to be an expert to get started ● She has an ability to build rapport with people How to get over it and on with it: ● She should take the first step and listen to her seed of inspiration ● Realize there is no point to anything ● She needs to step into her gifts and take action ● She needs to own her feelings and use “I” language ● Find her internal qualities that mirror traits she admires in other people Assignments and Takeaways: ● Take action and allow opportunities to integrate into all of your self-health programs. ● Give yourself a permission slip to go after what you want. Remember, it begins with by taking one step. ● Don’t wait for opportunities to come to you. Reach out to the people you want to connect with. ● If you relate to the “Imposter Syndrome” write out all the amazing things about you and your gifts and talents. Sponsor: Onnit Wellness - Receive a 10% discount on your purchase when you order through this link. Audible - Free audiobook download and a 30-day free trial. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Christine Hassler Free E-book @chrishassler on Snapchat @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Jill@christinehassler.com Coaches Corner with Julie Elizabeth Day
Julie began her adult-travels through Earth School as an actress in NYC, obsessing over yoga, astrology, meditation, and Louise Hay on the side. She had a thing for commercials, and was blessed with many, hawking everything from Diet Coke, to Volkswagen. She worked her way through the NY theater scene and was gifted the amazing opportunity to originate roles for both Christopher Durang and Neil Simon (on Broadway!). Then one day, while deep in a dark night of the soul, her guides told her to leave acting. Trusting the inner call, she promptly dialed up her agents... and the path was chosen. What followed next was a journey of intense human learnings, blissful soul-discoveries, and every emotion in between. Shamanic travels, yogic trainings, New Thought teachings... the journey was filled with wisdom, and what she learned through it all was that the human-ness is holy, and this life is too precious for words. She finds that laughter is the greatest medicine, and love is the greatest healer. Whichever path you choose to get there, those two seem to remain infinitely true. Licensed as a Spiritual Practitioner through the Agape International Spiritual Center in 2010, Julie has a knack for helping others to access high truth, connect to their team in the unseen, download pristine guidance from Higher Self, and have fun doing it. In other words... unpack the BS, and embrace an authentic life of joyful expression and contribution. She does this through individual sessions, classes, workshops, and writings. Her unique blueprint to joy involves dogs, nature, laughing wayyyy too loud, and dancing wildly. Find her at: www.practicalmystics.com and julieelizabethday.com
I talk a lot on this show about Expectation Hangovers - how they are the disappointments and curve balls that teach us and grow us. But, it’s also important to acknowledge the unexpected surprises that delight us and support us in magical ways. That’s why it is important not to plan every little thing, to make space for the unexpected, and to leave more time for soul food. In order to be in this place of space and possibility, we have to come into right relationship with uncertainty. What is a right relationship? Realize that we never have total control and that nothing is ever 100% certain. During times of transition, we should honor that we are in a season of change in our lives. We should not source our sense of feeling safe with being certain of everything. Know that we are always being supported and being guided by the universe even when we feel most lost. Today’s caller is Elle, who called me to discuss her upcoming life transition and the fear she has about it. We hear in this call yet another example of how there is almost always a deeper issue underneath our questions. As I began to shine a light on the dark places Elle had inside, she began to connect the dots and came to some of her own conclusions. Often, people stay stuck on their current problems or questions rather than asking the deeper questions. We can not arrive at clarity until we clear the deeper, underlying issues. We can not move into our full potential if we are playing it safe all the time. Change does not happen in our comfort zone. Bust through your limiting belief that no one will be there for you if you take a leap of faith or make a change. There are so many new guides, angels and soul friends who show up for us at exactly the time we need them to. Changing your vibrations also changes your consciousness. I invite you to join me for my retreat in magical Bali which includes meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the opportunity to meet soul friends. There are only 2 reservations left. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join any of my events or business programs. Consider/Ask Yourself: Are you in a transition time or feeling uncertain about things? Are you grasping for control, safety and security? Are you projecting your security on to another person, job or something else outside of you? Do you ever feel alone? Would you like to feel more connected to or supported by the universe? Elle 's Question: Elle wants to know how to transition into her new life after years of military service and as a newly single person. Elle 's Key Insights and Aha’s: She is creating her own fear. She has always wanted to be an entrepreneur. She craves security because she missed out on a developmental phase of her childhood. She dates emotionally unavailable men because that is how her father was. How to get over it and on with it: She can heal her lifetime longing for a father. Take this opportunity to delve into the divine masculine and the divine feminine powers. She needs to let go of belief systems that tell her security comes from outside of herself. Assignments and Takeaways: Get into a right relationship with your uncertainty. Follow those ‘what if’ statements with something good. Make future tripping a desirable destination. Find a lightworker to work with. Have one person to shine a light on your dark places. Forgive your parents. Remember that life is full of magical uncertainties and the divine will always have your back. Sponsor: Onnit Wellness - Receive a 10% discount on your purchase when you order through this link. Audible - Free audiobook download and a 30-day free trial. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Christine Hassler Free E-book @chrishassler on Snapchat @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Jill@christinehassler.com
Arriane Alexander is The Rock Your Life Coach with a Masters Degree in Spiritual Psychology. She helps female entrepreneurs and businesswomen step into new possibilities so they can create a life and career they’ve always dreamed of. She spent over 12 years as a high level executive in the fashion business and walked away from that successful career to follow a heartfelt dream of succeeding in the entertainment industry and as a transformational Life Coach. Today, she works consistently as an Actor on TV shows like Justified, Grey’s Anatomy and The People vs O.J. Simpson. On top of that, she is the Host of two TV shows, and booked numerous commercials. In other words, she’s created the life of her dreams, and as a Rock Your Life coach for over a decade, she helps women do the same in a fun, inspired, and transformative way. She works with women all over the world –Entrepreneurs, Health and Fitness Experts, and Executive Business Women to help them overcome their fears, self-doubt and any other obstacles blocking their path, to create the foundation for their new life, and a journey to take them there. Is it risky? Of course it is. Without risk, there’s no life, no excitement, and no happiness. There’s no fun, either. But once a woman starts taking risks, once she start taking bold actions, she will discover that what she thought of as impossible is suddenly within your reach. She will do things she's never done before, and wonder, “Who is this confident, radiant, and fabulous person?” It’s her. It’s been her all along, and Arriane is with her every step of the way to Rock Her Life. www.arrianefreebie.com For Your FREE Video Series on How To Bust Through Limiting Beliefs www.arrianealexander.com` Facebook.com/arrianealexander IG: @arrianealexander Twitter: @arriane1000 Snapchat: @arrianealex Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIIx-kpVFElpPdXCipUtMWg
At my signature retreat, many of the women who attended seemed to have amazing connections and gone through physical transformations – in just three short days. It made me think of questions I get a lot, which are “How do I get to a state of joy and deep connection, and stay there?” and “How do I get rid of hurt feelings from the past, which are impacting my ability to be happy in the present?” When the retreat started, we didn’t have the intention to be “happy” or better. We started the retreat with acceptance and love for exactly where we were. Acceptance is the first law of the spirit. This is where the healing and the transformation always begin. We, humans, learn through contrast. Healing is the application of love to the places inside that hurt. Suppression, repression and pretending you are fine are not bringing love to your dark places. The journey is worth it, because on the other side of the dark is joy. True elation comes from being liberated from the judgments and limiting beliefs that unresolved issues and suppressed emotions perpetuate. Today’s caller, Jennifer, wants to know how to be happier. The definition of happy is a state of elation or excitement. As human beings who learn or grow through contrast, being in a single state all the time should never be the goal. However, being in the state of awareness, acceptance and in the vibration of love is really what we are here to learn how to do consistently. Love doesn’t mean being happy all the time. Love is unconditional, it accepts all and it greets whatever emotion or issue we are facing with compassion. Apathy and indifference are the opposites of love. The more we accept the dark and bring love into the places inside that hurt, the less we feel the darker emotions, and the more we experience the state of happiness and heart-opening gratitude and compassion. *Coaches: Please don’t be attached to pleasing your client by working to get them what they want right away. Ask clients to define things before projecting your definitions on them. As coaches, we are not just listening to words. We are listening to the client's tone of voice, inflection; and we really need to use all of our senses to listen to all of the different ways clients are communicating with us. When the client has an ‘aha’, encourage them to talk it through. I invite you to join me for my retreat in magical Bali which includes meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the opportunity to meet soul friends. There are only 2 reservations left. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join any of my events or business programs. Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you have the expectation that you should feel happy all the time? Do you sometimes pretend you are happy, when really you’re not? Are you waiting for something outside of you to make you happy or make you feel settled? Are you struggling with not feeling happy at all or being depressed? Maybe, you feel that nothing is wrong, but nothing is right either. Jennifer 's Question: Jennifer wants to know how to truly feel happy in her life. Jennifer 's Key Insights and Aha’s: She has an unrealistic view of happiness She’s trying to source happiness from the outside She pretends to be better than she is She suppresses her emotions How to get over it and on with it: Allow herself to feel the tears and emotions when they come She should start by accepting and celebrating who she is She should replace ‘fine’ with honest answers of how she is doing She should commit to doing a 40-day meditation practice Assignments and Takeaways: Take off your mask and let yourself be seen. Don’t pretend to be happy all the time. If you need to talk, ask someone to listen. Use the emotional section of Expectation Hangover to help you get to your dark places of anger, fear or shame. Have a gratitude practice. Every night write down what you are grateful for. Start a meditation practice and read my blog post, Why you are not meditating? Start a 40-day practice - a daily discipline which makes you feel a higher level of acceptance, gratitude and therefore, happiness. Sponsor: Onnit Wellness - Receive a 10% discount on your purchase when you order through this link. Audible - Free audiobook download and a 30-day free trial. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Christine Hassler Free E-book @chrishassler on Snapchat @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Jill@christinehassler.com