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Over It And On With It

Christine Hassler provides you with practical tools and spiritual principles to help you overcome whatever obstacles might be holding you back. Each episode, Christine coaches callers live on the air offering them inspiration and guidance to heal their past, change their present and create what they really want. Topics include: relationships, career, health, transitions, finances, life purpose, spirituality and whatever else callers have questions about. Christine coaches "regular people" on problems – and opportunities - we all face. It's a show that reminds you that you are not alone, while also teaching things you can implement in your own life.
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Over It And On With It
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Now displaying: October, 2020
Oct 31, 2020

A must-listen for both men and women! Traver Boehm joins Christine to talk about why so many men are emotionally unavailable or displaying unhealthy masculinity and how to shift it. Traver is inspiring millions of men to shift their experience of masculinity by combining the Primal Masculine with the Divine Masculine.  He is an author, speaker, and founder of the ManUncivilized Movement, as well as a former Strength & Conditioning coach, a CrossFit gym owner, an MMA fighter, a bodyguard, an acupuncturist, and a surfer.  (Check out his amazing TEDx talk by clicking here.)

Website: www.manuncivilized.com

Instagram: @traverboehm

Oct 28, 2020

This call is about developing authentic relationships by being authentic. Today’s caller, Kylie, is individuating and is trying to figure out how to have a grown-up relationship with her mother. This call is useful for those of you who are wondering how to have an adult relationship with your parents and break free of the patterns that were set up in childhood.

 

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode268]

 

When we become an adult, we start to step into sovereignty. Our parents, or caregivers, raised us and they were our authority figure. We were dependent on them. As children, we couldn’t care for ourselves and were not supposed to. We were subjected to whatever patterns our parents imprinted upon us. Since as children we are sponges, we absorbed many of the way they did things, the way they feel their emotions, and the way they relate.  We learned as children to adapt to those behaviors and be whoever we think we need to be, to be safe, to be loved, and protected.

 

Then, as adults, as we step into sovereignty and we are not dependent on our parents, and we are dependent on ourselves, we have to consider the relational dynamic that was set up when we were dependent and had no sovereignty, no power.

 

The patterns that were set up your parental dynamic, either with one or both of your parents when they were set up, you had no choice in the matter. Today, you do. Do you still want to keep playing out the patterns that were imposed and imprinted on you as a child, now that you are an adult? Or, do you want to individuate and have a healthy adult relationship with your parents?

 

If so, it may involve upsetting them. The other person being upset is often a side effect of setting boundaries. You cannot wait until you are sure the other person will not be upset to do it.

 

To create a vision for a relationship that requires another person who is not doing their work can leave you with a massive expectation hangover. I have a guided talk in the Calm app.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you walk on eggshells or have anxiety when it comes to one or both of your parents or anyone in your life?
  • Do you often feel yourself contorting into what you think someone wants you to be so you avoid upsetting them?
  • Do you feel like you are growing at a faster rate than your parents? Or, have outgrown your parents and you’re not sure how to have a relationship with them?
  • Are you authentic and sovereign in your relationships or do you tend to give your power away?

 

Kylie’s Question:

Kylie wants guidance on how to develop a more authentic relationship with her mother.

 

Kylie’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • She rarely speaks with her mother even though they live close.
  • Her parents divorced when she was six.
  • She decided she does not want to follow her mother’s path.
  • There is some co-dependent patterning.
  • She is careful about how she communicates with her mother.
  • She does not want to disappoint her mother.
  • She is in tune with her body and working on her personal development.
  • She embraces intimacy with others.
  • She gives her mom a lot of power while disempowering herself.

 

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • Be careful not to take the caretaking role with her mother.
  • Be unapologetically herself.
  • Let it be OK that her mother gets upset.
  • Ask her boyfriend to call her out when she rolls back into her previous patterns.

 

Takeaways:

  • Stop editing yourself in relationships, especially the ones closest to you. It is okay to rock the boat.
  • No hiding, no avoiding. Embrace “carefrontations” and speak your truth.
  • Do not parent your parents.
  • Ask yourself why you chose your parents.
  • Look at the ways you are not sovereign. Where are you giving your power away?

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Christine on Facebook

Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler

@ChristinHassler on Twitter

@ChristineHassler on Instagram

Assist@ChristineHassler.com

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services.

Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.



Oct 24, 2020
If you listen to this show, you are most likely an older soul and you are going to love this episode with Ainslie MacLeod. He is an internationally acclaimed past-life psychic, spiritual teacher, and award-winning author of The Instruction, The Transformation, and most recently, The Old Soul’s Guidebook. Ainslie specializes in exploring past lives to reveal your life’s purpose and has been a featured guest on Oprah’s SuperSoul Conversations Series. He lives on a tranquil island in the Pacific Northwest.
 
Learn more about Ainslie, sign up for his membership community, and take your soul type quiz at: ainsliemacleod.com
Oct 21, 2020

This call is about seeking an external change to fill an internal void. Today’s caller, Leigh, wants to make a career change because she is not fulfilled by her current career. But her career switch is not the priority, it is about healing and breaking patterns. This call is important for any of you who feel stuck, who want to make a change, especially a career change, but are not doing it.

 

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode267]

 

Practical decisions are often fear-influenced decisions. Fear-influenced decisions are not wrong. We feel we have to make decisions that give us more certainty. But, we sacrifice a lot of our beliefs, our magic, and our dreams when we do. As human beings, we learn through contrast, so it is OK to make fear-influenced decisions.

 

There are a lot of reasons why we do not make the changes we want to make. It can come back to childhood wounding and it can also be because we don’t have the right foundation.

 

We often seek out relationships or careers to give us what we didn’t get in childhood. For example, you might be seeking out someone in a relationship who makes you feel safe. Or, you may be seeking out a career to make you feel self-expressed and free. Many of our quests for fulfillment are a call for healing. But, remember, we never want to use something external to fill an internal void.

 

Empaths are sponges. We soak up a lot of information. One of the tendencies of empaths is that we take too much of other people’s guidance. We take on people’s feelings and accept what people tell us we should do. If you are an empath, think about that, feel into that. Do you allow other people to tell you who you are and what you should do, versus trusting your own discernment?

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you feel a call to do something different but can’t seem to make the change?
  • Did you grow up feeling like you had the attention you desired and deserved or are you starved for attention and emotional expression?
  • Are you in a relationship where you feel fully supported?
  • Are you afraid to speak your needs and go after your dream?

 

Leigh’s Question:

Leigh wants to make a career change and would like guidance about how to follow her dreams.

 

Leigh’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • She is interested in a career in personal development or healing arts.
  • She is currently a lawyer but not passionate about her work.
  • She has two children under five.
  • She loves deep conversations.
  • She needs financial security.
  • People always question what her heart desires.
  • She felt alone and not heard as a child.
  • She wants to follow her heart.
  • She is an empathetic, feelings-based person.
  • Her husband doesn’t understand why she needs a change.

 

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • Prioritize herself and her marriage.
  • Talk with a coach or therapist where she can feel heard and supported.
  • Get into the habit of expressing her emotions.
  • Express herself in her marriage.

 

Takeaways:

  • Get a consistent, habitual form of support in a therapeutic environment.
  • Remember, there is divine timing for everything.
  • If you feel you are not moving forward in the direction you want, it doesn't mean you’re not moving forward. You may have to re-route your path.

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Christine on Facebook

Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler

@ChristinHassler on Twitter

@ChristineHassler on Instagram

Assist@ChristineHassler.com

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services.

Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.



Oct 17, 2020

In this quickie episode Christine shares tips for how to get out of limbo and make a choice so that you can move forward. If you are struggling over a decision, don't miss this one!

Oct 14, 2020

This call is about eliminating the imprints put on us by other people. Today’s caller, Rory, has childhood wounding from her father’s verbal abuse and her mother’s lack of support. She feels stuck in her life but she is just in a loop of patterns she created to cope with not getting what she needed as a child. 

 

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode266]

 

Whatever parent’s love we crave most or whichever parent we felt the most distant from is usually who we tend to find a relationship with or we model ourselves after. And, that is what we are always chasing as an adult.

 

We want our parents to be proud of us but especially our fathers. Knowing your dad is proud of you is massive. We want to know our mom loves us unconditionally and dad is really proud of us. It helps our self-esteem.

 

If you are someone who feels stuck, realize you are not stuck. You are just caught in a loop based on your imprints and your patterns and your wounding. You have to find an exit route. And, often the exit route is what you did not get as a child that you need to give yourself.

 

People are often good at giving others what they are horrible about giving to themselves. You may be nurturing and compassionate towards others but hard on yourself. Or, patient with others but completely impatient with yourself. Anything we give in overflow to others is what we need to give ourselves.

 

What are you giving that you’re not receiving?

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you feel stuck in your life? Do you keep trying but things just aren’t happening?
  • Do you consistently start things but don’t finish them?
  • Did you grow up in a household where both parents were really hard on you? Did you feel like nothing you ever did was right?
  • Are you excellent at giving others compassion, acceptance, and understanding but not so great about giving it to yourself?

 

Rory’s Question:

Rory feels she has hit a wall and doesn’t understand why she doesn’t finish things she starts.

 

Rory’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • She grew up with a lack of love.
  • As a child, she was told she was different, sensitive, and that she would fail.
  • She wonders what the point of her life is.
  • She has a pattern of quitting.
  • She has recurring disturbing dreams about her father and sister.
  • She didn’t get any completion energy from her father.
  • She internalized her father’s voice.
  • She attaches negative connotations to journaling.
  • She feels pressure to do a lot of things.
  • She doesn’t speak to herself with compassion.
  • She has a fierce inner critic.

 

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • Nourish herself with the things she didn’t get.
  • Bring more healthy masculine energy into life.
  • Reduce the amount of doing and be compassionate with herself.
  • Realize external things won’t take the place of her passions.
  • Write out and record what she wishes her mother would have said and listen to it several times a day.
  • Listen to this episode again to reflect on how she is talking to herself.

 

Takeaways:

  • What loop are you in and what are the imprints and patterns that have you in a loop? How can you find an exit route?
  • What did you always want from your father or mother but didn’t get and start giving it to yourself?
  • Listen to the voices in your head and to the ones that are mean, the ones that push you, the ones that don’t accept you say, "Who is this, who is this?" and separate yourself from those voices.

 

Sponsor:

ShipStation — The solution for online businesses and individuals who want to ship things without leaving home. ShipStation software tracks all of your shipments in one easy-to-use interface. Try ShipStation for free for 60-days by using the offer code 'OVERIT'. ShipStation helps your business grow and thrive.

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Christine on Facebook

Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler

@ChristinHassler on Twitter

@ChristineHassler on Instagram

Assist@ChristineHassler.com

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services.

Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.



Oct 10, 2020

Omar is a gifted Storyteller, Public Speaker, and Life Coach specializing in Addiction Recovery and Emotional Healing work. He’s the host of the incredibly popular SHAIR Recovery podcast. He delivers a powerful message of overcoming drug addiction and an inspirational 16-year journey of recovery.  Omar is a successful self-made entrepreneur, is married to his soul mate, and lives in one of the most beautiful places in the world, Costa Rica. He has transformed his life through recovery, personal development, and coaching and now he helps people all over the world transform their lives.

Listen and learn more:

https://theshairpodcast.com/
https://omarpinto.com/

Oct 7, 2020

This call is about treating ourselves with compassion, encouragement, and unconditional love when we have a mother wound. Today’s caller, Megan, believes people avoid her because she has too many problems. What we uncover during our session is that she has created a false independence because it is how she copes with having a neglectful mother.

 

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode265]

 

When we don’t have anyone holding us, we hold things inside.

 

The difference between being a victim with friends and being vulnerable is being a victim is always complaining about the same thing, never empowering yourself, and never doing anything differently. Being vulnerable is sharing what’s in your heart, and taking responsibility. It’s when you are not looking for a solution, not always complaining about the same thing but just having an open heart and being intentional about how you choose to shift it, even if it’s just being more compassionate with yourself. Victims don’t make too many friends unless they just hang out with other victims and they can all throw pity parties together. This doesn’t mean to not be vulnerable. You can be vulnerable without going into victim consciousness.

 

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you feel like you are too much for people? Do you feel you lose friendships or people avoid you because your life is hard and you think that you are just too much?
  • What events in your childhood are keeping you stuck?
  • Do you have an attitude that nothing works out and things are hard?
  • Did you have a mother who was not there for you or who neglected you, or who you were not enough for?

 

Megan’s Question:

Megan feels she is too intense or too much for other people and would like guidance on how to break free of the pattern.

 

Megan’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • People pull away or avoid her.
  • She had three near-death experiences as a child.
  • Her parents divorced.
  • She feels isolated.
  • She struggles with low self-worth.
  • Her mother was neglectful in many forms.
  • She is mothering herself the way she was mothered.
  • She attracts emotionally unavailable people.

 

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • Nourish her relationship with herself.
  • Separate from her struggles to connect more deeply with herself.
  • Communicate with an advisor or good friend.

 

Takeaways:

  • Do the hand exercise and give it a voice.
  • Consider what you think of when you think of a “mother” and write out a list of the qualities that make an amazing, loving mother and integrate those qualities into your life.
  • Work on being vulnerable and intimate with your friends.

 

Sponsor:

Jenni Kayne — If you love clothes that are both stylish and super comfortable with a dash of refined simplicity, you will love Jenni Kayne. Having comfortable cozy items is essential at any time of year. Use the code ‘OVERIT’ for 20% off at checkout!

 

Resources:

Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Christine on Facebook

Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler

@ChristinHassler on Twitter

@ChristineHassler on Instagram

Assist@ChristineHassler.com

Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services.

Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show

Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.



Oct 3, 2020
Emily Pereira joins Christine to talk about getting over heartbreak, leaving a "safe/successful" life and finding love and happiness in unexpected places.
 
She is an international retreat leader, yoga teacher, and women’s coach specializing in helping women call in intimate, heart-thumping, passionate, I got-your-back-no-matter-what love. Her raw vulnerable storytelling laced with mind-blowing ahas about women’s empowerment have reached over 5 million people worldwide. She has written for some of the biggest media outlets of our generation and her first book, a memoir, The Quest: from the Hollywood Hills to the Amazon Jungleone woman’s search for enough will be released Nov. 10th 2020.
 
She is also the host of "The Quest for Love Summit" - a 7-Day Virtual Experience curated to help you discover the secrets to wild attraction, cosmic connection and committed devotion.  You can join for free at: https://thequestforlovesummit.com/
 
Emily lives in Santa Teresa, a seaside village along Costa Rica’s Pacific coast, with her husband, Manex and two small children, Saïa Moon & Teotihuacán where together they founded the Sunrise Mountain Retreat and Wellness Center.
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