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Over It And On With It

Christine Hassler provides you with practical tools and spiritual principles to help you overcome whatever obstacles might be holding you back. Each episode, Christine coaches callers live on the air offering them inspiration and guidance to heal their past, change their present and create what they really want. Topics include: relationships, career, health, transitions, finances, life purpose, spirituality and whatever else callers have questions about. Christine coaches "regular people" on problems – and opportunities - we all face. It's a show that reminds you that you are not alone, while also teaching things you can implement in your own life.
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Now displaying: November, 2017
Nov 29, 2017
This episode is about breaking out of a self-imposed prison cell and taking a conscious action which will lead to change. Todays caller, Shanna, needs to squelch her limiting beliefs and embrace her strengths and her power.

[For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode116]

Shanna has been punishing herself. Shame does that to us. When we feel ashamed about something we overcompensate and that becomes our punishment.

Anytime we are in overcompensation mode and do not allow ourselves to live the life we really want, we keep ourselves in a self-imposed prison.

Its a humbling thing to realize that we are the common denominator in situations we dont want. But, its important that we dont blame ourselves. When we find ourselves at this crossroads, it is time to start creating the things we want instead of the things we dont want.

Where are you procrastinating and what will it take for you to change?

One of my favorite ways to empower people is teaching retreats. So, in March 2018, I am hosting my annual signature retreat. It is an intense, 3-day, women-only spring event with only 20 spaces available. This is the last time I will lead the retreat, as I am training others. To find out more e-mail Jill@christinehassler.com or check out Spring Retreat.

Consider/Ask Yourself:
Do you feel stuck in a job or relationship and you feel you cant get out of it?
Do you feel over-responsible in your life but is responsibility an area that could use some growth?
Are you really free? Are you locked in a self-imposed prison because you dont think you have any choices?
Do you procrastinate in making a change until you are forced to do so?

Shannas Question:
Shanna is having a hard time leaving a job she feels is a toxic environment.

Shannas Key Insights and Ahas:
She feels she may not find a better job.
She doesnt feel worthy of help.
Parenting is the hardest thing shes ever done.
She felt shame around her pregnancy.
She is brutally hard on herself.
She doesnt believe she can make an internal shift.
Her fear-based predictions of how things will go are off.

How to Get Over It and On With It:
She should start looking for another job.
She needs to believe she can succeed at what she wants to do.
She should avoid letting her outer experience dictate her inner experience.
She should remove the word try from her vocabulary.
She should uplevel her responsibility and embrace her power and strength.
She should write out her plan of action.

Takeaways:
You have the ability to respond to situations in life as you choose. How are you choosing to respond to things?
If you are stuck, what is your why? Why are you procrastinating and making excuses?
Stop trying to figure things out. Make the necessary internal shifts and take action.

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Resources:
Christine Hassler
Christine Hassler Podcasts
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristinHassler on Twitter
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
Nov 25, 2017
Most people think mental toughness when they imagine a Navy SEAL. What they don't expect is the thoughtful, yoga-innovating, joking and laughing, professor of leadership named Mark Divine.
Through Marks teaching, entrepreneurial endeavors and travel to foreign countries, he noticed the power of mental toughness, emotional resilience, intuitive leadership and a healthy spirit for anyone wanting breakthrough performance. They weren't solely for combat or restricted to the business world or one culture. He'd watch them transform lives in people from every background, nation and belief system. So he wrote and self-published his first book, Unbeatable Mind, in 2011 and launched its at-home study program.
Listen in as Christine learns about having an unbeatable mind from Mark and don't miss the incredible breath work exercise he takes us through!

Learn more at https://unbeatablemind.com
Nov 22, 2017
This episode is about vanquishing self-criticism, letting things go that no longer serve you, and how to get what you want from life.

We are not always good friends to ourselves and it can be reflected back to us in our friendships like it is today in my call with Claire. One of Claires friendships has just reached an expiration date and she is learning valuable lessons from it.

[For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode115]

Other people can be mirrors for us and often, it takes someone else to wake us up. If a friend treats us bad enough it causes us to look inside ourselves to understand what it is showing us. It can show us the kind of friend we are being to ourselves.

Don't stay in an unhealthy friendship or one that doesn't serve either of you. We tend to hold on to friendships just a little longer because we don't have to see the person as much. We justify putting up with it or we think we need to stay in the friendship because of the history. Or, we don't have the guts to end it because we don't want to upset somebody.

When we have a fierce inner critic it doesn't compartmentalize. It doesn't cheer us on in our career and then pick us apart physically. It is pervasive in all aspects of our lives. A fierce inner critic can impact our confidence. We can take something personally to our detriment or we can take it personally toward our growth.

To get what you want, you have to believe that what you want is out there. Your longing is your psychic knowing.

One of my favorite ways to empower people is teaching retreats. So, in March 2018 I am hosting my annual signature retreat. It is an intense 3-day, women-only spring event with only 20 spaces available. This is the last time I will lead the retreat as I am training others. For early-bird pricing or to find out more e-mail Jill@christinehassler.com or check out Spring Retreat.

Consider/Ask Yourself:
Are you compartmentalizing your life? Are you stuck in one area that may be caused by an unresolved issue in another area of your life?
If you talked to or treated your friends like you do to yourself would you have any friends?
Is your confidence down? Do you find yourself on the receiving end of criticism from other people?
Do you have any friendships that have passed their expiration date and are no longer healthy for you to continue?

Claires Question:
Claire wants to get unstuck in her life after an emotional falling out with friends.

Claires Key Insights and Ahas:
She found a friends comments inappropriate.
She can be critical of herself and lack self-confidence.
Her friend is a mirror of how she treats herself.
Questioning herself has impacted her career momentum.
She goes through cycles of emotional sensitivity.
She doesnt enjoy certain aspects of her job.

How to Get Over It and On With It:
She should leverage this experience to perpetuate her growth.
She should write down 50 things about herself she is grateful for.
She should write out a description of what she wants from her work.
She should collect evidence about why the job she wants does exist.

Takeaways:
Do a friendship inventory. Look at the friends in your life and ask yourself Is this an aligned friendship? Has this friendship passed its expiration date and is it time to complete this relationship and move on?
How can you be a better friend to yourself? Start being kind to yourself.
Write a detailed list of what you want. Get a picture in your mind and take action.
Make a list of 50 things you are grateful for.

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Nov 18, 2017
Christine speaks with Women For One Founder and author Kelly McNelis about her new book Your Messy Brilliance. This is a must listen for all perfectionists and over-doers out there. Learn how to embrace ALL parts of you, even the messy ones, and live a more authentic life.
Get your copy of Kellys book here: http://womenforone.com/messy-brilliance-book/
Share your story and join Women For One here: http://womenforone.com/
Nov 15, 2017
This episode is about understanding the basis of relationships that feel like an addiction. Todays caller, Arelle, has some unresolved daddy issues which keep her latched on to a much older man.

[For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode114]

When we have a strong co-dependent relationship and it feels like an addiction or a drug it generally comes from a childhood wound. It is important, developmentally and psychologically, to have a healthy relationship with our parents. If we don't have a healthy relationship with our parents and as adults, we don't resolve our issues through inner work, therapy, coaching or spiritual practices, we go look for what we didnt get from our parents from the people we date. Often, it is our younger self who picks our relationships. Our survival instinct tells us that if our parents are not there for us we will die. This is why codependent relationships can feel like a death when we try to separate from them, it is because it is triggering the child in us to feel like they may not survive.

Arelles relationship issue was more about her father than it was about her guy. Arelle may not have fully grieved the relationship she didn't have with her father. She never received the validation and attention she wanted from her father so she is playing out the scenario with her guy.

If you relate to this on-again-off-again relationship, you have to choose to stop your relationship. Accept that it is not good for you and get out. A codependent, abusive, toxic relationship is not safe and its not what you want.

One of my favorite ways to empower people is teaching retreats. So, in March 2018 I am hosting my annual signature retreat. It is an intense 3-day, women only spring event with only 20 spaces available. This is the last time I will lead the retreat as I am training others. For early bird pricing or to find out more e-mail Jill@christinehassler.com or check out Spring Retreat.

Consider/Ask Yourself:
Are you in a relationship that some part of you knows is not good for you but you cant seem to permanently break it off?
Are you going through withdrawal because you recently ended a relationship and are tempted to rekindle it?
Did you lose a parent at a young age from death, divorce, or abandonment?
Do you find yourself looking for safety and security in someone else and identify with being a bit dependent or are do you provide that to someone else?

Arelles Question:
Arelle would like to end her codependent relationship but cant seem to stop going back to him.

Arelles Key Insights and Ahas:
Her father passed when she was young.
There is a significant age difference between her and the guy.
She has difficulty feeling safe.
She may have not completely dealt with her fathers death.
She has an eating disorder.
She has left her addiction six times.

How to Get Over It and On With It:
She should find a counselor who is able to connect her past relationships with her present relationships.
She should consider going cold turkey and not see or speak with her guy again.
She should research codependency support groups and see if there is one in her area.
She needs to be a grown up and set herself up for success.

Takeaways:
Take off your rose-colored glasses. Make a list of the things that are true about your relationship and what you fantasize it to be.
Find a counselor or coach who will help you connect the dots. There is no shame in going to counseling.
If you are in an on-again-off-again relationship, turn it off. Do something that is good for you and end it for good.

Sponsor:
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Nov 11, 2017
Its 11/11 do you know the significance of that number? Listen to find out!

In this Coaches Corner Christine also teaches the difference between a trigger or issue based choice and a preference. She empowers you to honor who you are and what you like and let go of FOMO.

She then shares some great take-aways from top speakers like Brene Brown, Jane Fonda, Shonda Rhimes and Marianne Williamson that she just heard speak at a big event.

Christine reveals one of her preferences when it comes to massive crowds and events that may help you feel more like yourself the next time you are in a social situation.
Nov 8, 2017
This episode is about shining your light and stepping into your full potential. Todays caller, Sara, wants to break her pattern of self-sabotage, stop playing small and to live an abundant life.

[For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode113]

We dont just arrive at our full potential. We take steps to move into our full potential by not limiting ourselves, by sharing our gifts, by expressing ourselves authentically, and by going after what we truly want and not feeling any guilt or shame about it wanting it or having it. We fear success and are worried about what other people will think or feel, particularly leaving people behind, because we are growing at different rates. We doubt the goodness coming into our lives and we wait for the other shoe to drop. We end up sabotaging our health, wealth and relationships. But why?

Sara had a habit of creating intimacy through people needing her, through pleasing people or through having a problem or issue she could commiserate about. She would make herself small to create a bond or connection with someone else. I helped her realize what was the payoff of why she was scared to shine her light.

Consider/Ask Yourself:
Are you currently, or has there been a time in the past, where things start going great and you sabotage it?
Are you afraid of shining your light because of what other people might think or you may leave people behind?
Do you long to feel connected to people so much that you engage in people pleasing or caretaking just because you want to feel like you matter and you want to be connected?
Are you willing to admit that you live in a scarcity mindset instead of an abundant mindset?

Saras Question:
Sara would like to break her cycle of self-sabotage when it comes to her business and health.

Saras Key Insights and Ahas:
She fears she will be separate if she lets herself shine.
She may be addicted to suffering.
She is scared to disrupt the dynamic that creates intimacy.
She is afraid of how powerful she really is.
She grew up in a scarcity mindset.
She is trying to be in both scarcity and abundance.

How to Get Over It and On With It:
She needs a new picture of what success and health will look like for her.
She should shine brightly from her essence without comparing it to others.
She needs to shine so she can empower others to do the same.

Takeaways:
If you are engaging in self-sabotaging behavior, determine what the payoff is. Write down a new way to get the same payoff. Reflect on any limited beliefs you may have inherited.
Think about people who are shining their light and how they inspire you. Get a new picture of what living into your new potential looks like.
Write down what your life would look like if you were shining brightly.

Sponsor:
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Daily Harvest Organic Superfoods delivered to your door. Use promo code OVERIT to get 3 free Daily Harvest cups added to your first box.

Resources:
Christine Hassler
Christine Hassler Podcasts
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristinHassler on Twitter
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
Nov 4, 2017
Picture a time, maybe it is even now, when you have been preparing for something BIG like an interview, event, presentation, or the release of some creative endeavor. Now consider how much mental, physical, and emotional energy you put into it.

Was it a lot -perhaps too much? Did you find yourself stressing out about it?

On top of that did your perfectionist start to kick in like you kept tweaking and editing and trying to make it better?

Where is the line between healthy preparation and perfectionism/obsessing?

Thats exactly what Christine covers in this quickie episode of Coaches Corner.
Nov 1, 2017
This episode is about acknowledging successes and how releasing emotional weight can help release physical weight. Todays caller, Lindsay, is continuing on her course to personal mastery but she feels stuck when it comes to her health and wellness.

[For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode112]

If you are wondering why is it so hard to implement personal growth efforts, its because neural pathways are created over time, especially when you have been doing things the same way for years. Simply being aware of something doesnt create change. Growth is a process, not an event.

And growth is part of being human. There is always more growing to do and with the right tools the easier it becomes. We have to stop approaching growth as a fix-it, self-improvement, something is wrong with me project. Its important to celebrate how much growth you have experienced and how far youve come towards personal mastery.

If you need emotional release, do the Temper Tantrum exercise in Expectation Hangover. As you work through the emotional residue you will need less and less of the emotional release work but It takes more than one time to deal with suppressed emotions.

Practice is the key to transformation.

Lindsays Question:
Lindsay has been successful in shifting many parts of her life but is still struggling with health and weight issues.

Lindsays Key Insights and Ahas:
She has shifted her relationship with herself.
She is on a strict food diet.
She has taken my Personal Mastery course.
She has an emotional relationship with junk food.
Her parents divorce may still be affecting her.
She feels not worthy.
She is going to get off the diet treadmill and get healthy.

How to Get Over It and On With It:
She should find a holistic nutritionist and learn what her body needs.
She should write an apology and a thank you letter to her body.
She should choose to be worthy.

Takeaways:
Watch the Why You Are Not Losing Weight Despite Doing Everything Right, Why Willpower Isn't Enough When It Comes To Emotional Eating videos I did for FitLife.tv.
Write a letter to your body for how hard youve been on it and ask it what it needs.
Consider what you didnt get from a parent and start giving that to yourself.

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Resources:
Christine Hassler
Christine Hassler Podcasts
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristinHassler on Twitter
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
What Are You Truly Craving? with Alexandra Jamieson
Shift Your Health and Your Mindset with JJ Virgin
Optimize Your Health with Mark Sisson
What Your Body is Telling You Podcast with Tiffany
Possible Side Effects of Maltodextrin and Sucralose, by Jessica Bruso
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