Listen in as Christine gives you the cure for comparison and jealousy. This advice is transformational if you implement it (and is way more effective than just attempting to “stop comparing!”). If you use this advice, you will see how comparison can actually be a very wonderful thing.
This episode is about becoming a loving parent to ourselves. My coaching session with Joanne is a beautiful example of how important it is to give ourselves the love or attention we did not receive from our parents. Even if you had super loving and attentive parents, you should still be giving yourself the same kind of love.
[For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode86]
A lot of people believe they can heal the wounds from their own childhood by being a different kind of parent than they had. And while breaking generational patterns is incredibly valuable, it is only 50% of how we heal. We must mother or father ourselves with the same unconditional love and attention we give our children.
Two things often come up as blocks when we attempt to take quiet time for ourselves. One, the guilt or expectation that we should be doing other things that are "more productive." Two, feelings we may not want to deal with can surface when we take quiet, meditative time.
People who have children sometimes say, "My children are my teachers." When you have children it is common for things from your childhood to be triggered. Suppressed or forgotten memories start to come forward. It is important for parents to acknowledge there may be something for them to learn from it.
Aubrey Marcus and I are facilitating a 3-day retreat in Austin, Texas over Memorial Day weekend for men and women. The focus of the retreat is Love: Practice Makes the Master. There will be yoga, breathing exercises, ecstatic dance and more. Come and become part of the tribe.
My Inner Circle Membership Community is an eclectic community where anyone can find a home. Transformations and bonds are created by people sharing and connecting with each other. Email Jill@ChristineHassler.com about joining.
● What kind of parent are you to yourself? Would you talk to or treat a child the way you talk to or treat yourself?
● How did you feel loved and nurtured by your parents? Are you giving the love and nurturing to yourself?
● How did you not feel loved and nurtured? How can you start giving that to yourself?
● When it comes to self-care and making time for yourself, do you find other 'to-dos' take priority?
Joanne finds it challenging to provide herself self-care on a routine basis. She continually gives other things priority over her self-care.
Joanne's Key Insights and Ahas:
● She’s aware of how important self-care is.
● She feels mom guilt when she is not spending time with her baby.
● She is mirroring a pattern her mom had when she was growing up.
● She wanted love, attention and acceptance from her mother.
● She broke generational patterns.
How to Get Over It and On With It:
● She needs to mother herself in a way she wasn’t mothered as a child.
● She needs to acknowledge herself for the mother she is.
● She should talk to baby Joanne and be with her in a mothering way.
● Make ‘you time’ a priority, and leave a space open for your feelings to come forward. Suppressing your feelings through distraction will eventually wear out.
● Give yourself the love you crave from your parents, or that you got from your parents.
● If there are issues from your parents to be addressed, write them a forgiveness letter and let them off the hook.
● Have a conversation with your younger self, and tell them anything you yearned to hear from mom or dad but didn’t.
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Christine responds to questions from listeners. The first topic is around how to set healthy boundaries and break toxic patterns with family members. The second question is regarding whether avoiding disappointment is possible. Listen in as Christine talks about dealing with “Expectation Hangovers” and how to purse goals without setting yourself up for a let down.
Join Christine and Aubrey Marcus for a retreat open to men and women: LOVE, PRACTICE MAKES THE MASTER. https://www.eventbrite.com/e/love-practice-makes-the-master-tickets-33443861490
Dealing with disappointment? Want to learn how to transform what Christine calls an “Expectation Hangover” into a massive opportunity for growth? Be sure to get her latest book here:https://www.amazon.com/Expectation-Hangover-Overcoming-Disappointment-Work/dp/1608682412
This episode is about taking steps towards your dream. Today’s caller, Daniel, is passionate, and his enthusiasm is contagious when he talks about his music. When he deviates from his dream to take jobs just to pay the bills, he gets depressed. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode85] I like to say, dreams are actually our inner psychic knowing what is to come to us. Things we feel called to, from our heart. How do we know what is coming from our hearts and what is coming from our ego? Get clear about it by reading my What’s the Difference Between Sacrifice and Compromise? Vlog post. Our head has wants; our heart has desires. When we are not listening to our heart or we are not pursuing the things we love, a part of us may start engaging in self-sabotaging behavior. It's important to not have the soul sucked out of us. Feed your soul and do things to fulfill your creativity and your passion. Don't let anything suck the soul out of you! Aubrey Marcus and I are facilitating a 3-day retreat in Austin, Texas over Memorial Day weekend for men and women. If you don’t know Aubrey, go back and listen to the Coaches Corner, Go For Your Win. He is a seeker who appreciates consciousness above all else. The focus of the retreat is Love: Practice Makes the Master. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● What are your dreams? Are you giving yourself permission to pursue them? ● Have other people’s doubts or comments about your dreams prevented you from listening to your own inner guidance? ● Do you have a limiting belief that you are too old, too unqualified, or too poor to go after what you want? ● If you are in pursuit of a dream, are you actively and consistently taking steps toward it? Daniel's Question: Daniel wants to know which action steps he should take to pursue his dreams. Daniel's Key Insights and Ahas: ● He feels pressure to get a regular job. ● He is a perfectionist. ● He doesn’t know if he is practical or irrational. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● He should go for it 100%; get his work out there, and identify people to emulate. ● He should put together a demo reel. ● He should hustle for a year before making a decision about additional schooling. ● He should compose his personal mantra. Action Steps: ● What is your dream? ● Are you going after your dream? If not, why not? What is your excuse? ● What is one action step you can take to move toward it? ● Post your action step as a comment to the show notes so that I may root you on! Resources: Christine Hassler What’s the Difference Between Sacrifice and Compromise vlog post Christine Hassler Podcasts Expectation Hangover Inner Circle Membership Community Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Jill@Christinehassler.com Love: Practice Makes the Master Retreat Upwork Elance
Listen to this reassuring message from Christine that will remind you of the truth of who you are.
This episode is about not feeling good enough. Today’s caller, Jen, knows it is not good to believe she is not good enough, but she feels her problem is insurmountable. The essence of who Jen is isn’t broken, it’s just a pattern she’s comfortable in. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode84] Jen is experiencing a limiting belief. It shows up in a variety of ways, like her feeling not deserving, feeling broken, or not being lovable. It can lead to insecurity, people pleasing, body image issues, eating disorders, and accepting dysfunctional relationships. During the call, I allow Jen to go on for a while because I am waiting for her to ask for help. For those of you who are being coached or in therapy — If you are more committed to keeping your story than to truly letting go of it, you are uncoachable. We all get attached to our limiting beliefs, because they are familiar, comfortable, and often get us the attention we are seeking and the validation or sympathy for how hard life is. There is merit to discussing our past, and healing memories. But, we must do it with vulnerability, compassion, and forgiveness so we can let it go, to get over it and on with what we want to create. Awareness without action is merely psychological entertainment. Aubrey Marcus and I are facilitating a 3-day retreat in Austin, Texas over Memorial Day weekend. If you don’t know Aubrey go back and listen to the Coaches Corner, Go For Your Win. He is a seeker who appreciates consciousness above all else. The focus of the retreat is becoming masterful at love. Sign up for this incredible retreat. Email Jill@ChristineHassler.com about joining my Inner Circle membership community. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Do you struggle with not feeling good enough? Do you doubt you are worthy or capable of having the things you truly want? ● When you get close to the things you want, do you often sabotage it or doubt you can keep it? ● Do you make your ‘enoughness’ conditional? Jen's Question: Jen wants to know how to move past her past traumas, and change her narrative. Jen's Key Insights and Ahas: ● She is holding on to an old pattern because it’s comfortable. ● She believes her failed relationships and loss of friends is her fault. ● She withdraws and isolates herself. ● She gets her value from external validation. ● She is not seeing her life accurately. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● She needs to commit to shifting and interrupting her ingrained patterns. ● She can stop her thoughts of not being good enough, and create a new neural net. ● She should take a lesson from the children she works with. ● She should get a photo of her younger self and talk to it. ● She should create of voice memo of positive sayings to herself. Assignments: ● How attached are you to your story? Stop telling your sob story. ● Practice release writing to release emotions. ● Stop your thoughts and redirect them with the help of the ‘Whoaing’ technique in Expectation Hangover. ● Get a picture of your little one and use it as a way to generate love and self-acceptance. Sponsor: Audible — Free audiobook download and a 30-day free trial. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Expectation Hangover Inner Circle Membership Community Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Jill@Christinehassler.com Love: Practice Makes the Master Retreat
Jennifer is a therapist who is feeling physically depleted after working with clients. Christine gives her best tips for protecting her energy and serving people in a way that is energizing, not depleting. James is 54 years old and has worked at the same office job for three decades. He is interested in shifting to becoming self-employed but is disappointed he has not been able to get his new career off the ground. Listen in as Christine addresses both these topics. Links mentioned: Love: Practice Makes the Master! Join Christine and Aubrey Marcus for an empowering and transformational retreat in Austin. https://www.eventbrite.com/e/love-practice-makes-the-master-tickets-33443861490 EP 83: Letting Go of Parental “Mistakes” with Cathy. Make sure to listen to this episode to hear Christine talk about the difference between sympathy and compassion.h christinehassler.com/2017/04/episode83/
This episode is about breaking the cycle of generational patterns. Today’s caller, Cathy, experienced corporal punishment as a child, and finds herself doing the same thing to her daughter. As you listen to the call, I hope you are able to separate her character from her behavior. Her behavior is a reaction to her past. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode83] I’ve said many times, parenting does not come with an instruction manual. Often, we play out behaviors we learned from our parents. It requires a conscious awareness to know what behaviors we want to leave in the past, and which we pass on to our children. We need to have deep compassion for our parents and then forgive them, to stop repeating generational patterns. Stopping the cycle entails awareness, healing of our past hurts, and then the reparenting of ourselves to become the loving parent we never had. Abuse continues because the victim never heals. The victim either becomes the abuser or internalizes the abuse. Often, people do not share about past abuse, because there is so much shame. This is not just true for abuse, it is for any generational pattern. Coaches Tip — When clients share things that are hard to hear, don't go into judgment or sympathy. If you catch yourself doing so, say, "I forgive myself for judging or feeling sorry for this person," then shift back into compassion. Aubrey Marcus and I are facilitating a 3-day retreat in Austin, Texas over Memorial Day weekend. If you don’t know Aubrey, he is the CEO & Founder of the human optimization company, ONNIT. The focus of the retreat will be about Mastering Love, for men and women. Email Jill@ChristineHassler.com about joining my Inner Circle membership community. Keep These Distinctions in Mind: ● Acceptance versus judgment. ● Compassion versus sympathy. Cathy's Question: Cathy wants to understand how she may have adversely affected her daughter's self-esteem. Cathy's Key Insights and Ahas: ● She feels she made mistakes with her first daughter. ● She finds herself going back to the parenting tactics of her parents. ● She didn't like being a girl growing up. ● Her daughter is mirroring her. ● She has unresolved issues from her childhood. ● Her mother didn't defend her. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● She should talk to her younger self through a photo, and tell herself she did not deserve the punishment she received. ● She should work with a counselor or a coach who has experience with childhood traumas. ● Research parenting and discipline tools. ● When she gets triggered, she should practice giving herself a time out. Assignments: ● Get a picture of little you and commit to sending love to the little boy or girl inside of you. ● If you are aware of your need for healing, get professional to walk you through it. ● If you find yourself triggered by something, give yourself a time out. ● Use the scientist technique of Expectation Hangover and become an observer in your life. ● Consider what patterns you want to pass along to your children, and which ones you want to break the cycle of. ● Read Family Secrets by John Bradshaw and Conscious Parenting by Shefali Tsabary.
Ready to end the vicious battle with food and stop hating your body? Then you’ll love this talk Christine has with Samantha Skelly, founder of “Hungry for Happiness” Samantha also mentioned her program that will take you on a healing journey to end your battle with food and find self acceptance. You can learn more about her course and community here: http://hungryforhappiness.com/ChristineHassler
This episode is about overcoming the pain our inner bullies create. Today’s caller, Ravi, was bullied as a child, and uses his inner critic as a protective measure. He became isolated and disconnected from his intuition, and he cut off listening to his heart because he didn’t want to feel. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode82] When we cut off our feelings we not only cut off the pain, but we cut off the love and inspiration as well. What happened in the past does not have to create your future. You can get over it and on with it, but you must be consciously committed to letting it go. To transform, you need love, wisdom, and compassion from your heart, and alchemy. I guided Ravi through a heart meditation, like this one from a Coaches Corner episode. Ravi experienced clarity after the meditation. His heart said it wanted expression through art. The next step was to transform his trauma and pain, but Ravi said he didn’t want to go there. Remember, the fear of feeling pain is what keeps you from transforming it. It is possible to alchemize passion, or suffering, into something you love. It takes a lot of energy to suppress pain. If you have had trauma, it can be scary to go there on your own. You should find someone to work with, someone who can go there with you to hold a space for you. The more you listen to your heart, the more it speaks to you! Join me this September at my retreat in Bali. Visiting a magical place with like-minded people will transform your mind, body, and spirit. It’s a unique experience where you can experience significant healing that will last the rest of your life. Email Jill@ChristineHassler.com to sign up. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Are you trying to figure out your issues or challenges in your head? ● Were you bullied, teased or criticized as a child or a teenager, and it still haunts you today? ● Do you have a past trauma you are terrified to address and feel? ● Would you say you live more in your head than in your heart? Ravi's Question: Ravi wants to know how to find purpose in his life. Ravi's Key Insights and Ahas: ● He disconnected from his conscious mind to cope with the trauma. ● He internalizes the external bullying. ● He’s scared of failure and being made fun of. ● He has managed his pain, but has not yet transformed it. ● He is in an avoidance pattern and protective mode. ● He’s been in the midst of self-loathing. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● He should tap into the passion he experienced to create art. ● He could help other people who have been bullied. ● He needs to listen to his heart. ● He needs to start alchemizing his pain. ● He should practice release writing when he feels sadness. Assignments: ● Read The Lesson Quest and Your Life’s Purpose in Chapter 9, The Spiritual Level in Expectation Hangover. ● Be honest about what you are attempting to figure out, and alchemize it. ● Listen to my Coaches Corner with Jim Kwik. ● Volunteer and be of service to someone else to help you with your inner critic. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Over It and On With It Listener Survey Expectation Hangover Inner Circle Membership Community Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Jill@Christinehassler.com for Bali Retreat Information Bali Retreat Enrollment Page
This episode ROCKS!! Listen to Jim share some brain-changing tips that will change your life. Get ready to take some notes and have your mind blown in the best possible way as Jim shares tips for learning, improving memory, rewiring your brain, and altering your self-talk. Learn more about Jim and get some free goodies here: https://kwiklearning.com/ And check out his Kwik brain podcast here: https://kwikbrain.com/podcast
This episode is about issue-based relationships. Today’s caller, Rachel, has been in a relationship for 6 years, and for most of that time she has been uneasy and lonely. She says she doesn’t know if she should leave the relationship. But as you will hear in the call, Rachel knew the answer to her question before she even asked it. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode81] More often than not, the issue that comes up in our romantic relationships has to do with our parents. Whatever we craved but didn’t get from our mother or father, is what we tend to look for in a mate. And, until you heal your core issues, you will continue to seek out approval or attention from your parents, in your romantic relationships. During the call, it was clear to me Rachel was in an issue-based relationship. Issue-based relationships have a lot of chemistry, and the couple is super-attracted to each other. The physical part of the relationship, especially the making up, hooks you in. One of the reasons you are attracted to the other person is because your issues dovetail. The beautiful thing about issue-based relationships is they are learning opportunities. They bring unresolved issues to the surface, which makes them easier to identify and heal. It is time to be honest with yourself about the kind of person you are attracted to. Are you playing out unresolved issues from your past in your current relationships? I recommended Rachel join my Inner Circle Community to give her a support system, and a place where she can openly share. It is truly a place where you can invest in yourself. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Whose love, attention, or approval did you crave the most as a child? How has that played out in your relationships? ● Are you in a relationship you are questioning? ● Do you know you should be single, but you are frightened by the thought of it? ● Is your connection with a higher power something you would like to deepen? Rachel's Question: Rachel wants to know if she should stick with a relationship she feels uneasy and lonely in. Rachel's Key Insights and Ahas: ● She’s not sure what she loves about her partner. ● As a child, she craved her father’s approval. ● She entered into the relationship without knowing who he was, because she wanted to be chosen. ● She feels like she is falling apart. ● She’s unfamiliar with being by herself. ● She needed permission to trust her intuition. ● She feels it’s time to fly. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● She should take a break from the relationship, and work on herself. ● She should ask for help from her higher power. ● She should take a year off from dating. ● She should move out on her own. ● She needs to get some outside support. Assignments: ● Think about whose love, attention, approval, and affection you craved the most, your mom or dad’s? How are you still searching for it in other people? ● Start journaling. A good sentence starter is … Dear Mom, I wish you … or Dear Dad, I wish you … ● Get individual therapy or coaching. ● Ask for help. ● Make yourself your number one priority. ● Join my Inner Circle Community for support from those who WANT to support you. Sponsor: Freshbooks: Get a Free 30-Day Unrestricted Trial to Online Accounting Software. Enter “Over It and On With It” in the ‘How did you hear about us?’ section. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Over It and On With It Listener Survey Expectation Hangover Inner Circle Membership Community Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Jill@Christinehassler.com for Bali Retreat Information Bali Retreat Enrollment Page The Work by Byron Katie
Your wish is my command :) Many of you asked for a guided meditation to support you in listening to the wisdom of your heart so here it is. Enjoy. Big love from my heart, Christine
This episode is about freeing yourself from pain and anxiety. Today’s caller, Nicole, is struggling to find her true intuition. She feels it may be lost to her, or clouded over by her deep-seated anxiety. She has used her anxiety for many years to protect herself, but she now realizes it is time to get over it and on with it. We made a beautiful discovery together I hope helps you connect some of the puzzle pieces in your own life. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode80] The wonderful thing about pain and anxiety is that we have the power to free ourselves from it. Many of the overwhelming feelings we are having now are rooted somewhere in our past. Something devastating caused our young minds to create a program to follow, so we didn’t have to feel that way ever again. As we grow, the ability to address our fears, and overcome our ‘victim story’ becomes available to us. We are able to comfort our younger selves by self-parenting and through work that is healing. We also have the ability to acknowledge our need for protection, thank it for its service to us, and move our energy to where we need it now. We can then replace our impulsive responses with our inner voice, which is guided by our intuition. When we find our higher purpose, we find another more self-honoring, self-supportive way to get it. Retreat Information — Enrollment is now open for the upcoming Bali Retreat in September. Step into your dreams. Don’t let excuses stop you. Contact Jill@ChristineHassler.com to sign up. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Do you suffer from anxiety? Is there something you would like to be free of? ● Whenever you try anything new, does it come with a lot of fear? ● Do you prefer control over uncertainty? ● Did something happen in your past that might still be impacting you, but you are not sure what to do about it? Nicole's Question: Nicole has anxiety-driven panic attacks, and lacks self-confidence. She longs to have a deeper life and become connected to the world. Nicole's Key Insights and Ahas: ● She uses her anxiety as a source of protection. ● She needs to feel she is in control of a situation. ● As a child, she felt vulnerable. ● Her intuition will be clearer when anxiety subsides. ● She needs to respond rather than react. ● It’s OK for her to make mistakes. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● She should tell her younger self, “things will be alright.” ● Say, “I accept,” and then, “I am choosing to.” ● Interrupt the patterns of anxiety. ● Turn up the volume of her calm inner voice. ● Understand the difference between resignation and acceptance. Assignments: ● Think about the “big deals,” or significant events in your life. What belief systems were formed then, that might be impacting you today? ● Tell yourself the things you needed to hear during your “big deals.” ● Understand that it was not your fault. ● How does your protective mechanism serve you? Give it a new job description. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Inner Circle Membership Community Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Jill@Christinehassler.com for Bali Retreat Information Bali Retreat Enrollment Page
Listen in as Christine answers two listener questions. The first is about how to handle very different decisions making strategies in a marriage. The second is about opening your heart and being more vulnerable in dating after you have been hurt in the past.
This episode is about self-sabotage. Today’s caller, Drew, is an inspiring entrepreneur who has overcome odds such as being homeless and obesity but he is still getting in his own way. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode79] I acknowledge Drew for being honest, real and raw during our call. He is a seeker who is committed to his growth. He truly believes he is worthy and is committed to shifting. Often, we doubt ourselves because we haven’t made the changes we want, or haven’t achieved as much as we would like. The discomfort that comes from the feeling of not living into our potential, and the seeker who emerges from within us, are feedback to let us know we are well on our way. We do not optimize ourselves overnight. Part of living into our potential is feeling and dealing with the pain of not being there yet. It’s how we polish the diamond of our spirit. The problem is we label it as suffering because it’s uncomfortable. What if feeling a desire to transform is a symptom of being a seeker? It’s important to keep going. You will eventually feel a shift. You will start feeling less pain and more purpose. Your focus will shift from yourself to your mission and vision. You will heal core wounds and let go of limiting beliefs. This will attract different things into your life. What you do is not as important as how you do it. Allow your choices and subsequent actions to come from a place of self-love, acceptance, and service. A podcast I did with my friend Aubrey on his podcast is a great supplemental resource to this session with Drew. We talked a lot about self-love, judgment, and the inner critic. The Aubrey Marcus Podcast #89 — Self-Love and Psychedelic Medicine. Retreat Information — Bali is a place of healing. I have been visiting for 10 years, so my retreats offer an authentic Balinese experience, in addition to the retreat work. Enrollment is now open for the upcoming Bali Retreat in September. Step into your dreams. Don’t let excuses stop you. Contact Jill@ChristineHassler.com to sign up. Learn ways to trust yourself in my Inner Circle private membership community. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Have you overcome huge obstacles, but still don’t feel over the hump, or are still facing large obstacles? ● Do you feel like you have something to prove, and is it often the fuel that drives you? ● Are your self-worth and self-love conditional? ● Do you have an expectation to be strong and confident, but feel rejected on the inside? Drew's Question: Drew would like to know how to stop self-sabotaging himself and how to find the strength to pursue and achieve his goals. Drew's Key Insights and Ahas: ● He knows he is not broken. ● He feels he needs to prove himself. ● He sees himself through a lens of judgment. ● He puts conditions on his self-worth. ● He has a huge, low ego. ● He has felt invisible and rejected most of his life. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● He needs to create a daily practice around own his worth. ● He needs to become a better friend to himself. ● He should remove the conditions he puts on love, acceptance, and worthiness. ● He needs to stop trying to prove himself. ● He should use the Release Writing exercise in Expectation Hangover before meditating. ● When he feels himself drifting into self-sabotage he should remind himself of his why, his worth, and his true value, and feel love. Assignments: ● Examine what is driving your behavior. ● Write out your conditions of worthiness. ● Write out new rules, or the truth about your worthiness. ● Try a heart meditation. Allow love to fill your entire physical being. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Inner Circle Membership Community Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Jill@Christinehassler.com for Bali Retreat Information Bali Retreat Enrollment Page The Aubrey Marcus Podcast #89
This is a MUST LISTEN!! So real, raw and FULL of wisdom. Christine speaks with Ali Golden, the author of “A Good Soldier.” When Ally Golden heads off to college, she breathes a sigh of relief; she is ready to discover herself, independent of her mother. However, this newfound freedom and several failed attempts at intimacy soon leave Golden feeling adrift. But even as she withdraws from the world, Golden feels an all-powerful emotional connection to the woman who raised her. Moving into adulthood, Golden tries to envision a future in which she can begin her own family—as the mental decline of her mother reaches its lowest point. Will Golden be able to heal her relationship with her mother before it’s too late? Golden’s raw honesty and stunning emotional insights will comfort anyone who has been on the chaotic and unpredictable journey with a mentally ill friend or family member. Check out A Good Soldier on Amazon in trade paperback or ebook
This episode is about being conflicted when making a choice. Today’s caller, Anna, wants to leave her marriage but is unsure as to whether or not it is “the right thing to do.” [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode78] There is no right or wrong when it comes to ending anything. Giving up or getting out of something just because it’s hard or takes work is quitting, but opting out of something because it doesn’t align with your core values is a self-honoring choice. So, how do you know if you are quitting or giving up too early, versus when something has reached its expiration date? I believe any relationship takes work, and can be transformed, but sometimes it doesn’t serve either partner to stay together just because they made a commitment, if there is a drastic difference in values and vision. And, having guilt is useless. We feel guilty when we judge ourselves for doing something “bad or wrong,” and we think to suffer through the feeling of guilt somehow makes it better. If you are not married yet, my advice is to wait to marry until you are in a place where you are not looking for someone to fill a void or to meet a need, but rather someone to share your life with. Trusting ourselves is important. If you want to live in integrity, you have to have self-trust. You can learn ways to trust yourself in my Inner Circle private membership community. Retreat Information — Bali is a place of healing. I have been visiting for 10 years, so my retreats offer an authentic Balinese experience, in addition to the retreat work. Enrollment is now open for the next Bali Retreat in September. If you have objections, but you really want to do it. Don’t let excuses stop you. Contact Jill@ChristineHassler.com to sign up. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Are you in a situation that has reached its expiration date? ● Are you paying more attention to the opinions of others, rather than your own voice? ● Have you left a situation, but feel tremendous guilt about it? ● Do you tend to jump from relationship to relationship, believing that it will be different? Anna's Question: Anna wants to be sure she is not making a decision to leave her marriage from a place of fear. Anna's Key Insights and Ahas: ● She doesn’t need someone to make her feel safe anymore. ● She doesn’t want her marriage to work out. ● She doesn’t know how to deal with the guilt of leaving. ● She needs to take ownership of her feelings. ● She felt she couldn’t trust her own voice. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● She should acknowledge and appreciate everything her husband has done for her. ● She should use listen to her inner voice and find her own truth. ● She needs to forgive herself for buying into the misunderstanding that she was a bad person. ● She should be clear about why she is leaving, and honor it by being a partner to herself. Takeaways: ● If you are trying to stick it out in a situation out of pride, fear, or worry about what others will think, be honest with yourself, and make a self-honoring choice. ● Reach out to people who support you and can give you spiritual altitude. ● Make a list of all the qualities you want in a partner, and become all of those things. ● Find yourself during my retreat in Bali. Sponsor: Freshbooks: Get a Free 30-Day Unrestricted Trial to Online Accounting Software. Enter “Over It and On With It” in the ‘How did you hear about us?’ section. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Inner Circle Membership Community Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Jill@Christinehassler.com for Bali Retreat Information Marie Forleo’s B-School
Listen in as Christine answers listener questions. The first if from Jessica who is new on the personal growth path and having difficulty dealing with all the awareness and changes that are coming up. She has found herself in a funk and wants to know how to get out of it. The second one is from Lara who is asking about the difference between spiritual bypass and actually doing the work. And finally Christine takes on a question from Kelly who wants to leave her “safe” job and go for her dreams but is scared of leaving the security of a salary and benefits. And remember: FreshBooks is offering a 30 day, unrestricted free trial to my listeners. To claim it, just go to FreshBooks.com / CHRISTINE and enter OVER IT AND ON WITH IT in the “How Did You Hear About Us?” section.
This episode is about pursuing dreams, overcoming fears, and stepping into the freedom of being an entrepreneur. Today’s caller, Katie, feels a calling to start a business as a coach, but fear is holding her back.
We don’t get out of fear with pep talks or trying to push our way through. We get out of fear through action. One of Katie’s action steps is enrolling in B-School.
[For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode77]
Fear about what other people think of you will paralyze you, if you are not focused on service and impact. If you make your work about you, it will drain you emotionally. You will constantly be trying to protect yourself from criticism or judgment. It is not possible for everyone to like you. Feedback is feedback. You can choose to get triggered by it, and take it personally, or you can receive it neutrally. You have your own unique group of people you are supposed to help. Stop giving your energy to the people who aren’t your people.
If you stop analyzing everything, and start taking action, you will be able to use the energy to generate momentum in your business. Please stop wasting your time and energy obsessing about what other people think.
If you feel a calling and feel like you have gifts to share, stop stalling, and trust your gifts; it wouldn’t be there if it wasn’t leading you somewhere. Your dreams and desires are not random. But, only you can turn them into reality.
If you desire freedom of time and freedom of self expression, or you can feel a calling to do what you love, enroll in Marie Forleo’s B-School. I use what I learned in B-School in my business. It has helped me to uplevel every aspect of my business. Enrollment ends March 3rd, so use the payment plan and get started. It pays for itself. I am offering 4 free 90-minute group coaching calls, access to a private Facebook group, guided meditations, mastermind day and other bonuses because I believe in the program so much.
Katie would like to know how to get through the fear and anxiety that has come with the attention her new business is getting.
Katie's Key Insights and Ahas:
How to Get Over It and On With It:
Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler
Listen in as Christine coaches Chip, a fitness entrepreneur who wants to increase his impact and income by launching an online course but is not sure of where to begin. You’ll get to hear a different side of Christine’s coaching as she puts on her business / entrepreneur hat and supports Chip in getting clarity on the specifics of his course and launch. If you are an aspiring entrepreneur and want a clear step-by-step plan for how to build or grow your business AND would love Christine’s coaching then you will LOVE B-School which is the the world-renowned online business school for modern entrepreneurs. The 8-week online training offers step-by-step guidance on how to build a profitable brand that stands out, market your business in an authentic, non-sleazy way, and seriously increase your online presence so that you can spread your message to the masses - and make money! Enrollment opens only once a year, so if you’re considering B-School do not delay! Go there to see the bonuses Christine is offering and to enroll: www.christinehassler.com/bschool
This episode is about becoming getting over your past and becoming connected to your heart. Today’s caller, Jane is still impacted by a traumatic childhood. She would like to move past it and find someone to share her feelings with. [For show notes go here: http://christinehassler.com/episode76] I acknowledge Jane for her courage and her vulnerability. Just calling in is a testament to how far she has come. It’s true that when we are ready, we are guided toward our resources and teachers to help us heal. Jane said she felt anxious. For many people, anxiousness comes from having a chaotic childhood, not having structure, or having too much structure. If it’s true for you, don’t make yourself wrong, but also don’t use your past as an excuse to either be a rebel, or to feel like you can’t parent yourself or add structure to your life. You can. Our hearts are an intuitive voice of wisdom, guidance and reassurance. In our logical, mind-based world it is often easier to think than to feel, but emotional processing and healing cannot be done in our heads. People tend to be able to process and release emotions through writing. If you have been repressing your emotions, or distracting or numbing yourself, try writing down your feelings to help you hear your heart. Remember strength is not pushing through something. Strength is vulnerability. To truly live into our potential, we must connect to our hearts. Special announcement — We hit 1 million downloads in February! I am so grateful to all of you, and to celebrate I am giving away a gift to 3 of you. The prize is one month in my Inner Circle membership community for free. You can win by sharing why you like #overitandonwithit on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook. Just post, tag me, and don’t forget to add the #overitandonwithit hashtag! I recently spoke about the importance of connecting to our hearts at Aubrey Marcus’s Go For Your Win event. You can listen to what is probably my favorite interview of all time, Coaches Corner episode with Aubrey, if you are not familiar with him. Would you like to connect deeply to your feminine power, and get clarity that leads to deep healing? At the end of September 2017, I am hosting a retreat in a place which has cracked open my heart. Enrollment is now open for my women’s only Spiritual and Self Love Retreat in Bali. Contact Jill@ChristineHassler.com to register. If you want to actualize your dreams and have a heart-based online business, enroll in Marie Forleo’s B-School. I am offering free mastermind day and other bonuses because I believe in the program so much. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Is there something from your past that is creating problems in your present? Are you frustrated, and believe you should be over it by now? ● Do you deal with rushing around, running late, and feel like you are not meeting your deadlines? ● Would you like to be able to feel and connect to listening to your heart? Jane's Question: Jane would like to finally like to move past her traumatic childhood. Jane's Key Insights and Ahas: ● She recognizes how strong she had to be, to get through her childhood. ● She has a lot of anger and sadness. ● She has felt alone for a large part of her life. ● She appreciates her ability to keep trying. ● She welcomes people in her life to share her feelings and to be honest with. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● She should practice more release writing. ● She should get Expectation Hangover and perform the Temper Tantrum technique. ● She should find a professional to help her process her feelings. ● She should tell the universe she is ready for her guides to come forward. ● She should find a place to volunteer with children. ● She should say 3 loving things to herself about herself. Assignments: ● Practice release writing. I teach you how to do it in Expectation Hangover. ● In your spiritual practice, pray for your spirits, guides, healers, or coaches to come forward in a physical human form. ● If you are processing pain from your childhood, volunteer with children or animals to feel unconditional love. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Marie Forleo’s B-School
Listen in as Christine answers listener questions. The first one is from Frank who is 34 and dealing with a massive career expectation hangover. He keeps experiencing setbacks at work which are negatively impacting his confidence and ability to financially support himself. The second question is from Debra who at 52 found herself having a very unexpected (and inappropriate) romantic connection with a 33 year old colleague. Also be sure not to miss the FREE video training series about how to build a business and life you love from Marie Forleo. Go here to check it out: http://bit.ly/2kl15Wg And for more info on Christine’s retreat to Bali go here: http://christinehassler.com/bali-retreat-2017/
Today’s episode is about manifesting a relationship. Leila has been impacted by her father’s happiness, or lack of it, much more than she realizes. She would like guidance on how to remove any blocks she has formed. [For show notes go here: http://christinehassler.com/episode75] As you heard in the call, Leila’s true inspiration for calling in was the desire to be in a loving relationship, and to understand why she wasn’t attracting the kind of relationship she wants in her life. Programming from our past can impact us more than we are aware. In Leila’s case, she didn’t realize her father’s apathy towards his own life affected her. As a child, she felt like he wasn’t excited to be with her, and she felt not chosen and not fully seen. She longed for a connection with her father. We can only give the love we give ourselves. A parent’s impact on us is often more obvious when they have been abusive or suffer from an addiction. It’s important to look at the more subtle things that may be affecting you. Leila also didn’t want to take on the responsibility of fixing someone or making them happy. She felt taking on a relationship would be a heavy weight and a burden, and she would be responsible for making the man happy. It’s important to note that the role of a romantic partner and role of a parent are two very different things. Listen to my Coaches Corner with Marie Forleo of B-School. B-School is an online business school that covers everything you need to know to start your own business, plus I am offering bonuses because I believe in the program so much. I am offering four live group coaching calls, a guided meditation and visualization for each module and some new surprises for 2017! Email Jill@christinehassler.com. And Andrea Owen from my favorite podcast, Your Kick Ass Life is offering her e-book and audio, How the Crap Talk in Your Head is Making You Crazy and 3 Ways to Change It, for free if you text ‘selftalk’ to 444999. Consider/Ask Yourself: ● How has your parents’ overall level of happiness affected your level of happiness? Leila's Question: Leila would like to more deeply understand her feelings surrounding her father’s work, to make sense of why she has difficulty with committed relationships. Leila's Key Insights and Ahas: ● She picked up her father’s shame about his job. ● She doesn’t share details of her life with her father. ● She never felt important to her dad. ● It is not her job to fix her dad. ● She is looking to fill a void. ● She feels an over-responsibility towards men. How to Get Over It and On With It: ● Make a list of what she wanted from her dad, and forgive him for not being able to give her those things. ● It is time for her to get a clear idea of what she wants from a romantic relationship. ● She should step into her divine masculine energy and give herself the validation, appreciation, and encouragement she longed for from her dad. ● She should let go of the belief she has a block towards being in a relationship. ● She needs to break the pattern of believing she needs to fix anyone. Assignments: ● Look at beliefs or ways of being you have taken on from your parents, and write a letter to them giving those things back. Rip it up or burn it, afterward. Do a visualization of you giving unwanted fears, judgments, or limiting beliefs you acquired from your parents back to them with love and forgiveness. ● If you want to attract a romantic relationship or upgrade the one you have, have a clear picture of what you want and what you have to give. ● Let go of the belief of a relationship block, or you are doing something wrong, and get excited about any investment you make in yourself in a way of giving to your future partner and family. ● If you want to make a change in your career, or take your business to the next level, look into B-School. Resources: Christine Hassler Christine Hassler Podcasts Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram Christine@christinehassler.com Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Send your questions to Christine, to be answered on Coaches Corner. Marie Forleo’s B-School Your Kick Ass Life Podcast
I have such a treat for you all this week as Marie Forleo joins us on Coaches Corner. She drops SO much wisdom in this interview. Some of the topics we cover include: What “modern marketing” really is all about – and why it’s not sleazy! How to overcome fear when it comes to your business and stepping into your purpose The reason why taking action is critical . . . even if you do not know your final destination How to get clarity in ANY situation What you can do to figure out if your business is viable idea Marie just released a FREE video training series where she gives you some incredible guidance on starting or building your business.
Go HERE to get it. (http://bit.ly/2kMiqV0) Also, I am a proud affiliate partner of B School and will be announcing my special bonuses soon (one of them is coming to my home in San Diego for a free masterminding day with me!). Be sure to sign up at www.christinehassler.com for my emails so you stay in the know. A little more about Marie Forleo: Named by Oprah as a thought leader for the next generation and one of Inc.’s 500 fastest growing companies, Marie's mission is to help you build a life you love and use your gifts to change the world. She’s the creator of the award-winning online show MarieTV with over 26 million views on YouTube with an audience in 195 countries. She’s the founder of B-School, an online business school for modern entrepreneurs. Through her Change Your Life, Change The World initiative, every product purchased helps support a person in need.